Edwardian Posted February 5, 2020 Author Share Posted February 5, 2020 Are there any Parishioners conveniently located for Bedford? I ask because I've done a Foolish Thing, and it turns out that Achingham Gasworks is there. 13 1 Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nearholmer Posted February 5, 2020 Share Posted February 5, 2020 That is rather good. Yes, Not far from Bedford, but not sure I could promise to collect very soon - I’m quite busy currently. K 1 Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
RMweb Premium Compound2632 Posted February 5, 2020 RMweb Premium Share Posted February 5, 2020 Aha. And there was I thinking: https://library.thehumanjourney.net/4140/1/BEGAS17.pdf. 1 2 Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Edwardian Posted February 5, 2020 Author Share Posted February 5, 2020 (edited) It's very inconsiderate and foolish of me, I acknowledge, but this was another instance of someone's old work that was nicely done and full of character and, I thought, deserved a second life. It seemed a very good fit for Achingham Gas Works and something that could be sympathetically enhanced. As usual, however, the practicalities eluded me. Heart over head, I'm afraid. EDIT: I really am an idiot, I've just seen that it's a 7-hour round trip by road! Edited February 5, 2020 by Edwardian 6 Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
RMweb Gold Regularity Posted February 5, 2020 RMweb Gold Share Posted February 5, 2020 7 hours ago, Edwardian said: Are there any Parishioners conveniently located for Bedford? That's rather lovely. Annoyingly, yes to your question, and I will be seeing you at the weekend, but unfortunately I don't think I can safely get it into the car along with Lydham Heath! On the plus side, it does mean I won't be tempted to keep it for myself! 2 Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Edwardian Posted February 5, 2020 Author Share Posted February 5, 2020 4 minutes ago, Regularity said: That's rather lovely. Annoyingly, yes to your question, and I will be seeing you at the weekend, but unfortunately I don't think I can safely get it into the car along with Lydham Heath! On the plus side, it does mean I won't be tempted to keep it for myself! You're very sure of seeing me this weekend, considering that I only emailed about my Doncaster ticket today. Apparently I'm on the list for admission on Saturday. It would be lovely to see you, even if you are not accompanied by Achingham Gas Works. It's 33" long, 10" at its widest, and 8" tall without the chimney in place. I should think that would fit in almost any domestic motor vehicle. Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
RMweb Gold Regularity Posted February 5, 2020 RMweb Gold Share Posted February 5, 2020 I can't guarantee its safe delivery, unfortunately. Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Edwardian Posted February 5, 2020 Author Share Posted February 5, 2020 2 hours ago, Regularity said: I can't guarantee its safe delivery, unfortunately. I didn't know you worked for My Hermes 6 Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hroth Posted February 5, 2020 Share Posted February 5, 2020 (edited) On 05/02/2020 at 17:21, Edwardian said: I didn't know you worked for My Hermes With that shower, getting things in fragments or their habit of pre-binning the remains, is the least of your worries. The algorithm for finding a parcel "delivered" by these yahoos is... giveup = 3 // giveup is the amount of time you want to keep looking for the damn parcel. This may be adjusted parcel_visible = see_parcel() parcel_inbin = lookinbin() IF(parcel_visible=1 or parcel_inbin=1) then parcel_found=1 ELSE DO // loop until you find the parcel or give up parcel_found=parcelhunt() giveup=giveup-1 WHILE (parcel_found=0 OR giveup>0) ENDIF IF (parcel_found =1) takeindoors() ELSE have_exasperating_phone_conversation_with_courier() cry() ENDIF Something like that, anyway... Hmmmm.... Replace IF(parcel_visible=1 or parcel_inbin=1) then parcel_found=1 ELSE DO // loop until you find the parcel or give up parcel_found=parcelhunt() giveup=giveup-1 WHILE (parcel_found=0 OR giveup>0) ENDIF with IF(parcel_visible=1 or parcel_inbin=1) then parcel_found=1 ELSE parcel_found=parcelhunt(giveup) ENDIF which is much tidier! Edited February 6, 2020 by Hroth misc typos. (later) A typical late evening effort. In the cold light of day I feel that the Do...WHILE loop would be within parcelhunt and the number of tries passed as a parameter. Much tidier! 4 1 3 Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nearholmer Posted February 6, 2020 Share Posted February 6, 2020 Black hole, inside a giant sorting warehouse in Calais, parcels are tracked inwards, but never emerge in our time/space dimension. 1 Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
DonB Posted February 6, 2020 Share Posted February 6, 2020 OMG, ... just had a notification from Hermes.... "We have your parcel......" Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
RMweb Gold Regularity Posted February 6, 2020 RMweb Gold Share Posted February 6, 2020 On 05/02/2020 at 17:21, Edwardian said: I didn't know you worked for My Hermes I started training at a very young age. People told me that there were no career prospects in ringing doorbells and then running away, but they were wrong. 12 Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nearholmer Posted February 6, 2020 Share Posted February 6, 2020 (edited) We’ve got one of those spooky doorbell setups that takes video and sound recording, and, on the 1:10000 occasions where you are connected to the worlds fastest WiFi, allows you to view and converse with the visitor from your phone. Today, I was able to watch from afar as Mr My Hermes ‘hid’ a parcel in the hedge where any passerby could have lifted it. Royal Mail always to the parcel away of nobody is home - luckily we can collect from their depot, which is nearby and open all the hours god sends. Edited February 6, 2020 by Nearholmer 2 Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Edwardian Posted February 6, 2020 Author Share Posted February 6, 2020 2 hours ago, Regularity said: I started training at a very young age. People told me that there were no career prospects in ringing doorbells and then running away, but they were wrong. 4 Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
RMweb Gold ian Posted February 6, 2020 RMweb Gold Share Posted February 6, 2020 5 hours ago, DonB said: OMG, ... just had a notification from Hermes.... "We have your parcel......" "...Do not call the police. If you ever wish to see it again leave £1,000 in used notes........" 1 6 Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
RMweb Gold Donw Posted February 7, 2020 RMweb Gold Share Posted February 7, 2020 I think it must be down to local depots. Hermes here gives a good service our problem courier is DX we have had numerous problems failing to make 'Named day Deliveries' the Exeter deport send a lrge roll of vynyl to Plymouth instead of delivering it to us it then took 4 days to recover and deliver it. Things got rather heated when the local manager told the supplier he had personally phoned to apologise and update us when he had done no such thing. Next time we were expecting some plants to be delivered a 48hr delivery took 10 days to arrive rejected the plants as they were useless by then. The Gas works does look nice but collection is a tad difficult I should imagine. Rather off the beaten track from West Somerset. Besides it wouldn't help bringing back here. Don 1 Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
RMweb Premium Annie Posted February 7, 2020 RMweb Premium Share Posted February 7, 2020 (edited) I shall very much do my best to treasure our local couriers who are lovely. Being local country folk they know very well that I'm not fast on my feet and might take a little while to come to the door and if a parcel is heavy they will even offer to carry it inside the house for me. 2 hours ago, Donw said: Things got rather heated when the local manager told the supplier he had personally phoned to apologise and update us when he had done no such thing. Ex-used car salesman is he? 7 hours ago, Nearholmer said: Today, I was able to watch from afar as Mr My Hermes ‘hid’ a parcel in the hedge where any passerby could have lifted it. Perhaps you need an attachment to your doorbell that makes loud and dramatic HG Wells like statements about being watched from afar. Edited February 7, 2020 by Annie can't spell for toffee 1 2 Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Edwardian Posted February 7, 2020 Author Share Posted February 7, 2020 From time to time I wonder who is reading the set of Midland Record that Tricky of this parish entrusted to My Hermes, but which never reached me. Here, of course, in the NE, everyone is good and kind and lovely, and our local guy is diamond. Whatever courier service you use, this same guy turns up! I am forced to conclude that his counterpart in Trickyshire is a lying, thieving git. My Hermes as an organisation just stepped away and I got nowhere. I'm afraid that once you get on my sh1t list ...... 2 Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nearholmer Posted February 7, 2020 Share Posted February 7, 2020 6 hours ago, Annie said: Perhaps you need an attachment to your doorbell that makes loud and dramatic HG Wells like statements about being watched from afar. That is a brilliant idea. I think that if I spent several lifetimes reading the manual (then passed it to young son, who would instantly tell me what to do, without reading it), it is possible to get the system to play recorded sounds when triggered by motion - it suggests the barking of ferocious dogs IIRC. Having Richard Burton annunciating in clear and portentous tones would be very effective in terrifying innocent passersby, cats, my good lady when she comes home very late from PTA meetings etc. It might also guarantee that we never, ever receive a parcel delivery again, which is what is called an 'unintended consequence', I think. 4 1 Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hroth Posted February 7, 2020 Share Posted February 7, 2020 1 minute ago, Nearholmer said: which is what is called an 'unintended consequence', I think. But so much fun! 1 1 Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Edwardian Posted February 7, 2020 Author Share Posted February 7, 2020 Anyone at the Doncaster show tomorrow? Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Edwardian Posted February 7, 2020 Author Share Posted February 7, 2020 All Hail ChrisF! Achingham Gas Works is currently nestling in his car. We shall take tea at Doncaster tomorrow. Anyone I know not actively seeking to avoid me should make themselves known if attending the show! Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Edwardian Posted February 7, 2020 Author Share Posted February 7, 2020 9 hours ago, Annie said: Perhaps you need an attachment to your doorbell that makes loud and dramatic HG Wells like statements about being watched from afar. 3 hours ago, Nearholmer said: That is a brilliant idea. Having Richard Burton annunciating in clear and portentous tones would be very effective in terrifying innocent passersby, cats, my good lady when she comes home very late from PTA meetings etc. It might also guarantee that we never, ever receive a parcel delivery again, which is what is called an 'unintended consequence', I think. "No one would have believed that in the last few seconds since you rang this doorbell, minds immeasurably superior to yours regraded you as the squirming little microbe you are! "Now put the parcel down and F- off!" 1 Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nearholmer Posted February 7, 2020 Share Posted February 7, 2020 (edited) The system was clearly developed with an American worldview in mind, because some of the ‘how to’ videos that go with it are really (without quite saying so) all about terrifying anyone who even approaches the boundary of ‘your property’ with threats of lethal force ....... it won’t be long before we read reports of how a paranoid individual has forged a Bluetooth link between his doorbell and a remotely controlled machine-gun, and accidentally reduced his wife to a twitching corpse. I only installed it to help my good lady when she was confined to bed undergoing very hefty medical treatment last winter, and am still not totally comfortable with it. PS: it would make an interesting test case, wouldn’t it? Does the constitutional right to bear arms extend to remotely controlled and/or automatically controlled weaponry? Are drone-mounted weapons included? Edited February 7, 2020 by Nearholmer Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
RMweb Premium TheQ Posted February 7, 2020 RMweb Premium Share Posted February 7, 2020 16 minutes ago, Edwardian said: "No one would have believed that in the last few seconds since you rang this doorbell, minds immeasurably superior to yours regraded you as the squirming little microbe you are! "Now put the parcel down and F- off!" That would have to be in / Polish / Albainian/ Lithuainian/ Estonian / Romainian/ whatever ex communist country cheap labour they are using.. Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
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