The Night Mail

[Winslow Boy]

1 hour ago, Happy Hippo said:

I wouldn't be so cruel, wot with all them spiders.

 

Dave could sleep in the workshop (once he'd tidied it up) and could be put to work finishing all my unfinished railway jobs.

 

There's a fridge, cake, whisky, cider and beer.

 

What's not to like?

 

Hmm I see a slight problem there.

[Oldddudders]

1 hour ago, jamie92208 said:

I suspect that French divorce lawyers could be expensive.

If you can find one who actually does something. Alison is tearing her hair out - she has very thick hair - at the non-progress of François's divorce. Apparently there will be a hearing with a judge on 23rd November. French legal processes take an age.

[jamie92208]

39 minutes ago, Happy Hippo said:

He was busted!

 

I wonder if he was busted again whence he got home?

 

Considering that he was shorter than her and about half her weight, I would not like to have been in his shoes.

 

Jamie

[PhilJ W]

2 hours ago, jamie92208 said:

I might as well tell the tale.  A Boxing day night with fresh snow on thd ground. As the duty Inspector I'd taken the Sgt out for a walk round Pontefract town centre. We discovered a broken lingerie shop window. I noticed fresh footprints heading away so left the Sgt to sort things out and followed the tracks.  The shift already knew that I did strange things.  Anyway I followed the tracks into, then out of the hallway of a block of flats, down to the main road then up past Baghill station heading  towards Chequerfield. Near the bridge over the railway, Simon will know where I mean, I found the miscreant, stumbling along rather slowly. Drunk as a skunk with a very fetching set of bright red bra and panties in his coat. Size 34B.  He was duly locked up and left to sober up till he could be questioned.  Two PC's were delegated to deal with him for burglary.  About 03.00 we had to go and tell his wife.  It was not a pretty sight that filled the doorway wearing a nightie and no teeth. Large was an understatement.  We duly told her that her dearly beloved was in the cells .  As we left, the PC that I was with remarked that the stolen bra might just fit round one of her assets. Ponte was never very politically correct.  I was then able to tease the shift that it was time that they went and found some burglars. All good fun.  

 

Jamie

 

1 hour ago, Happy Hippo said:

He was busted!

 

I wonder if he was busted again whence he got home?

 

If the undies weren't for his missus who were they for?

[Stubby47]

2 minutes ago, PhilJ W said:

 

If the undies weren't for his missus who were they for?

 

No, don't go there.....

[PhilJ W]

Depends on who's asking the question, his missus or the police.

[simontaylor484]

He might have been wanting to go to the big house away from the missus.

Sounds like Raymond the bar steward on D wing would be better looking.

[simontaylor484]

Just out of interest the lingerie shop still existed last time I was in town pre pandemic and Ponte still isnt very politically correct either. I have escaped 3 times and still ended up back living here.

First was to uni in Sheffield

Second was working in Abingdon 

Third our first house was in Featherstone 

[polybear]

3 hours ago, Compound2632 said:

But at the end he was under a vest....

 

Noooooo.....

Bear surrenders - I'll come quietly.....

[jamie92208]

37 minutes ago, simontaylor484 said:

Just out of interest the lingerie shop still existed last time I was in town pre pandemic and Ponte still isnt very politically correct either. I have escaped 3 times and still ended up back living here.

First was to uni in Sheffield

Second was working in Abingdon 

Third our first house was in Featherstone 

From memory it was come out of the Town Hall then turn left and it was on the right. Out of interest it wasn't the only time that I got prisoners by tracking footprintscin fresh snow. I got two motorbike thieves like that one night in South Leeds, through a back gatden, straight through a house, across the street and they were just taking their wet boots off in the house opposite. We got the bike back virtually undamaged as well. All part of life's rich pattern on the Middleton estate when a bobby ru s through your house from back to front, says hi and departs.

 

Jamie

Edited July 8, 2021 by jamie92208

[Stubby47]

Here's a question....

 

On Google Maps, in satellite view, you can see all the vehicles using the roads.

But, looking at the same place in Google Earth, all the moving vehicles have been removed.

 

Did someone really digitally remove every one and replace with roadway ? 

 

This only happens where Google Earth has a 3D imagery, for example in Plymouth, but not Truro.

[Northmoor]

54 minutes ago, Stubby47 said:

Here's a question....

 

On Google Maps, in satellite view, you can see all the vehicles using the roads.

But, looking at the same place in Google Earth, all the moving vehicles have been removed.

 

Did someone really digitally remove every one and replace with roadway ? 

 

This only happens where Google Earth has a 3D imagery, for example in Plymouth, but not Truro.

Not near my house it isn't.  It might be that it was simply photographed at a different (quiet) time.

[Dave Hunt]

Attractive though HH's offer of accommodation is, at the moment I'm basking in the lap of luxury. We are house, horse, cat and koi carp sitting for our friends who are slumming it in their second home in France and we are enjoying the experience of how the other half live. The house is an old and large, six bedroom, three bathroom job in a delightfully rural setting with several acres of land encompassing a granny annexe, paddocks and stables for the horses, a large heated, indoor swimming pool, greenhouses and a couple of outbuildings, either of which could comfortably house my layout. All we have to do is feed the animals, discourage squatters and drink the contents of the wine cellar, the latter being well within my sphere of abilities. I'm due to be here for the next three or four days but already I'm getting quite used to the lifestyle and could happily stay on. Jill will be back here next week and the owners are due to return on the 19th but I'm secretly hoping that by then there will be a travel ban between France and the UK.

 

Have to go now for a swim before dinner. It's rough but someone has to do it.

 

Dave

 

[Dave Hunt]

3 hours ago, jamie92208 said:

......it wasn't the only time that I got prisoners by tracking footprintscin fresh snow. I got two motorbike thieves like that one night in South Leeds.........

 

A railway modelling pal who was a Bobby in Manchester used to say that the best help the police had was the fact that most criminals are thickos. He used to tell the tale of one who held up a bank there by pointing a (fortunately fake) gun at a teller and passing her a note threatening to shoot unless she gave him all the money in the bank. Recognising the amateurly made fake firearm she refused and pressed the alarm button whereupon the miscreant fled. Due to the note being written on the back of an envelope addressed to him, the police were already waiting when he got home.....

 

Dave

[Northmoor]

8 minutes ago, Dave Hunt said:

 

A railway modelling pal who was a Bobby in Manchester used to say that the best help the police had was the fact that most criminals are thickos. He used to tell the tale of one who held up a bank there by pointing a (fortunately fake) gun at a teller and passing her a note threatening to shoot unless she gave him all the money in the bank. Recognising the amateurly made fake firearm she refused and pressed the alarm button whereupon the miscreant fled. Due to the note being written on the back of an envelope addressed to him, the police were already waiting when he got home.....

 

Dave

I remember a similar story on The News Quiz, where the robber wore socks on his hands to avoid leaving fingerprints.  Unfortunately he left the socks behind, complete with the nametags his Mum must have sewn in for him.

[simontaylor484]

That reminds me of an episode of Citizen Smith when they get ski masks knitted by a mates mum she embroidered their names on them so they knew who each other was.

 

My wife appeared on Google maps she was walking home when the Google car passed. Her face was pixelated out but i know its her. My youngest loves google street view he is s local guide on there he is only 11 its part of his autism traits 

[jamie92208]

1 hour ago, Northmoor said:

I remember a similar story on The News Quiz, where the robber wore socks on his hands to avoid leaving fingerprints.  Unfortunately he left the socks behind, complete with the nametags his Mum must have sewn in for him.

We locked up a burglar who couldn't understand  why he'd been caught. He had his driving licence in his trouser pocket and it caught on the window catch as he climbed through, neatly leaving the licence on the window sill.  The other reason that a lot get caught is through upsetting a woman.

 

Jamie

[Happy Hippo]

The SEAT went in for it's MOT and annual service today.

 

It passed with two advisories:  The first was a track rod end cover is cracking and the second is a  rearshock absorber which is on the way out as it is beginning to show signs of oil misting at the top end.

 

Since the parts are original, and the car is 11 years old, I'm not surprised.

 

The garage naturally would like me to go back and get the parts fitted there, but I can probably save myself the cost of a Dapol 7 mm scale  Pannier tank if I do it myself.

 

From my experience of changing shock absorbers in the past, the rear ones are so much easier than the front ones.  The track rod ends are far easier to deal with than anti roll bar bushes.

 

Of course, I will probably only be acting in an assisting role as the PH will be summoned to oversee the action and will no doubt muscle in to help his semi incompetent pater.

 

We're off down to Margam tomorrow  to see my mother for the first time in 18 months.  Returning Sunday evening:  It should be a quick return trip as we will  start our trip back around 1900 by which time the rest of the nation (even Wales) will be hunkered down in front of the square box.

[Dave Hunt]

1 hour ago, jamie92208 said:

We locked up a burglar......... 

The other reason that a lot get caught is through upsetting a woman.

 

In that case, remind me at frequent intervals not to adopt a life of crime.....

 

Dave

[PhilJ W]

Before I retired I used to go over to the local Morrisons of a lunchtime to buy a few items or even have a meal in their cafe. One lunchtime I witnessed a teenager grab a fistful of notes from a till as it was opened and run out of the store. I volunteered a description and a couple of days later a police officer came to my workplace to take my statement after the miscreant had been arrested. I asked if it was likely to end up in court and was told that it was unlikely as another witness was able to give the police his name and address. The other witness was his next door neighbour who he had been speaking to only a few minutes before in the queue for the till which he'd robbed.

[Tony_S]

My GP brother in law arrived at the surgery one day to find they had a break in. Some office equipment had been taken and someone had injured themself attempting to remove a photocopier. They had left a racist/religious insult written in their blood on the wall. Th police officer commented that he didn’t think this was the work of criminal masterminds. 
 

Edited July 8, 2021 by Tony_S

[pH]

A cousin of a mate of mine (he was from the bright side of the family) and another guy tried to break into a pub in the early hours of the morning. They set off the alarm. At that time of the morning, the only way they could think of getting away was by hitching a lift. Fortunately, the first car along stopped for them. Unfortunately, it was a plain-clothes police car responding to the alarm.

[jamie92208]

5 minutes ago, pH said:

A cousin of a mate of mine (he was from the bright side of the family) and another guy tried to break into a pub in the early hours of the morning. They set off the alarm. At that time of the morning, the only way they could think of getting away was by hitching a lift. Fortunately, the first car along stopped for them. Unfortunately, it was a plain-clothes police car responding to the alarm.

It happens, One morning I was in scruffs helping on an operation. Inwasxtaken to acgaragd thst had a stolen car in it and told to wait till a recovery truck arrived. After about an hour a scruffy young man walked up snd said"Helo mate, you haven't seen a garage with a mini 8n it have you," No I answered, what's up.  "My mste's just been nivked and wants mevto shift the mini for him before thecpolic turn up".  I've got news forv pu I said, you're nicked now.  Every one a winner as they say.  

 

Jamie

[New Haven Neil]

Someone say GG1?  Tuscan Red?

 

 

 

[jamie92208]

8 hours ago, New Haven Neil said:

Someone say GG1?  Tuscan Red?

 

 

 

Looks lovely, all I've got is a rathervlong fridge magnet that I boughtvatva service station on the Pennsylvania Turnpike. Oh, and Karl Zimmerman's book about the class.

 

Jamie