Dating, women and the 'hobby'...

[johnofwessex]

Personal experience suggests that an unwillingness to fire a full sized locomotive is never a good sign in any relationship

[The Johnster]

However, willingness to get into the cab is a good sign.

[Gibbo675]

On 20/02/2019 at 20:54, The Johnster said:

I have just repaired a pair of earrings using modelling tools and skills.  Brownie points, yay...

Did you repaint them into GWR lined green ?

[Gibbo675]

Hi Chaps,

 

I've just stumbled across this thread and my experience of women is that rather unfortunately they come in three main basic types with an extremely elusive fourth category that I have yet to encounter:

1. Plain not interested.
2. Certifiably neurotic.
3. Morbidly miserable.
4. Pleasant.

Live in hope, die in despair !

 

Gibbo.

[rockershovel]

7 hours ago, Gibbo675 said:

Hi Chaps,

 

I've just stumbled across this thread and my experience of women is that rather unfortunately they come in three main basic types with an extremely elusive fourth category that I have yet to encounter:

1. Plain not interested.
2. Certifiably neurotic.
3. Morbidly miserable.
4. Pleasant.

Live in hope, die in despair !

 

Gibbo.

 

I have to remark at this point that despite my widespread reputation for cynicism and misanthropy, I’ve been happily married for 36 years now. My good wife takes no interest whatsoever in my various interests and enthusiasms, and I’ve never doubted that this is an important element of that. 

 

Secondary aspects include a line of work which at times, produces sufficient cash flow to “stock up” against times when time is available and money is less so, without it actually passing through the domestic accounting process. 

 

No 1 Son is now promoting the idea that Grandad should build a “train set” for his toddler, my granddaughter, incorporating elements of his 1990s Hornby trainset, believed to be in the loft somewhere.. get the next generation on your side, however nominally, and you are off and running!

 

 

 

 

 

 

Edited March 23, 2019 by rockershovel

[jamie92208]

My daughter and her partner, who are expecting grandchild no 1 (A young lady) have stated quite categorically, that grandad will have to build a trainset for young Emily when she appears later this year.  Like Rockershovel above, my good lady has no real interest in trains.  However she has tolerated my hobby over the years.   She also has her own interests.   It seems to work.

 

Jamie

[Gibbo675]

2 hours ago, rockershovel said:

 

I have to remark at this point that despite my widespread reputation for cynicism and misanthropy, I’ve been happily married for 36 years now. My good wife takes no interest whatsoever in my various interests and enthusiasms, and I’ve never doubted that this is an important element of that. 

 

Secondary aspects include a line of work which at times, produces sufficient cash flow to “stock up” against times when time is available and money is less so, without it actually passing through the domestic accounting process. 

 

No 1 Son is now promoting the idea that Grandad should build a “train set” for his toddler, my granddaughter, incorporating elements of his 1990s Hornby trainset, believed to be in the loft somewhere.. get the next generation on your side, however nominally, and you are off and running!

 

 

 

 

 

 

Hi Mr Shovel,

 

You must have found one of those elusive fourth category types. Both my grandfathers, my father and brother seem to have managed the same feat as yourself, I have not yet been so lucky.

 

Fair play to you,

 

Gibbo.

[south_tyne]

17 hours ago, Gibbo675 said:

Hi Chaps,

 

I've just stumbled across this thread and my experience of women is that rather unfortunately they come in three main basic types with an extremely elusive fourth category that I have yet to encounter:

1. Plain not interested.
2. Certifiably neurotic.
3. Morbidly miserable.
4. Pleasant.

Live in hope, die in despair !

 

Gibbo.

 

Well you've successfully just written off half the world's population in one-fell swoop there......

 

In my humble opinion, lots of partners of modellers  (whether male or female) put up with an awful lot and are very understanding. It can be a very demanding hobby in terms of time, money and space, sometimes unreasonably so. 

 

There are plenty of your 'category 4' ladies out there. All about give and take - I hope you find the right one for you! A more positive attitude may help! 

Edited March 23, 2019 by south_tyne

[Gibbo675]

58 minutes ago, south_tyne said:

 

Well you've successfully just written off half the world's population in one-fell swoop there......

 

In my humble opinion, lots of partners of modellers  (whether male or female) put up with an awful lot and are very understanding. It can be a very demanding hobby in terms of time, money and space, sometimes unreasonably so. 

 

There are plenty of your 'category 4' ladies out there. All about give and take - I hope you find the right one for you! A more positive attitude may help! 

My dear fellow,

 

I would appreciate and respectfully request that you read what I wrote correctly and comment appropriately instead of putting words into my mouth. I have been made to feel very unhappy in my life and I wrote about my experience and not of any specific generality.

 

I wrote:

 

"I've just stumbled across this thread and my experience of women is that rather unfortunately they come in three main basic types with an extremely elusive fourth category that I have yet to encounter:

1. Plain not interested.
2. Certifiably neurotic.
3. Morbidly miserable.
4. Pleasant.

 

Live in hope, die in despair !"

 

For your information, I do actually live in the optimistic hope that I meet one of those women that are described as category four for I am more than well aware that they exist and indeed form greater part of the female part of the population. Should you read one of my replies to an above post you will note that my grandfathers, my father and brother have all met what may be termed category four women.

 

Unfortunately for me I have not, what is more I have been twice financially ruined and suffered a lot rather unpleasant emotional upset due to the perniciously selfish behaviours of two of my ex partners. That was my unfortunate experience, and what is more, not of my causation and is not a general observation.

 

May I add I am very sorry if you do not like my reply but it is both my unfortunate and unhappy truth.

 

Gibbo.

 

 

 

[johnofwessex]

At the expense of forum drift, what might the hobby be like if more women were involved?

[The Johnster]

A lot more attractive in general.

[Gibbo675]

12 hours ago, johnofwessex said:

At the expense of forum drift, what might the hobby be like if more women were involved?

Hi John,

 

At risk of forum drift and the undoubted barrage of criticisms that may follow, they way I see things are as follow:

 

1. Men and women are of quite different types of energy, should they be of combined energies we would be androgyne as species.
2. Because of the different forms of energies involved in the make up of the genders that form a duality within the universal experience, the way the genders both experience and display materially any interests that define their specific energies will be different. In short trains are boys toys.
3. To further complicate matters despite that the male and female genders form a duality the recreation of the universal experience is actually made up from a triplicity of experience. With boys toys, as above mentioned, the male energy, part one, creates a system that represents part two,that system, part two, is then controlled by the male energy. It is this element of control that forms the third part of that triplicity which is the recreation part of the universal experience. In general most women do not seek to control the material realm to anything like the extent that most men do, they do however have greater interest and power over the etheric realm, (girls toys).
4. Autism is far more prevalent in men than in women, how many autistic or those with autistic traits, myself included, are involved in a hobby that requires such order and control over a system ?

To assist in understanding what I have written what I have written, here are the seven Hermetic Principals:

 

 

Sorry, but you did ask !!!

 

Gibbo.

 

 

[Porkscratching]

I honestly wouldn't expect most women to have much interest in the kind of stuff I like....any more than I'd be interested in clothes shoes and TV junk that seems to appeal to them, Vive la difference eh!

[jonny777]

On 22/03/2019 at 22:43, Gibbo675 said:

Hi Chaps,

 

I've just stumbled across this thread and my experience of women is that rather unfortunately they come in three main basic types with an extremely elusive fourth category that I have yet to encounter:

1. Plain not interested.
2. Certifiably neurotic.
3. Morbidly miserable.
4. Pleasant.

Live in hope, die in despair !

 

Gibbo.

 

 

You may not have met one yet, but from experience I would have to move category 4 to 5, in order to add a new category 4 which is a combination of categories 1 to 3 but with the added problem of considering a gathering of railway enthusiasts (minimum 2) to be something to steer well clear of at all times. 

 

This may not be a barrier to a relationship, because I have been married to her for almost 44 years without too many hiccups. I have my hobby, she has hers - and we don't really intrude on each others' specialisms. 

 

However, the very mention of a special train, open day, preserved railway, model railway exhibition, etc., etc. and she will immediately have thought of one hundred better things to do with her time. 

 

She has no problems with railways in the form of "get on a train, find a seat (if possible), ride to destination, get off the train"; but that is the sum total of her association with them. 

[Steamport Southport]

On ‎23‎/‎03‎/‎2019 at 22:31, johnofwessex said:

At the expense of forum drift, what might the hobby be like if more women were involved?

 

Probably the same but with curtains and cushions....

 

What is it about cushions?

 

Never understood that one. Or OCD as it's called. Obsessive Cushion Desire.

 

 

BTW there have always been some talented lady modellers out there. One of the first layouts I liked was Eastbourne built by Vivien Thompson. Didn't even occur to me at the time that a lady modeller was rare.

 

 

Jason

Edited March 25, 2019 by Steamport Southport

[rockershovel]

My good wife does actually have one railway related interest - taking the children to the steam railway. We live quite near the NVR, so walking alongside the line, waving at people on the train, picking blackberries in season, running around at Ferry Meadows was always a popular distraction when they were small. 

 

We had a holiday cottage in Whitby for a number of years, and trips there often included a roundabout itinerary from Whitby to Goathland by local train, ride on the NYMR, run about at Pickering Castle or Levisham, sometimes the quite amazing ride by local bus over the moors from Goathland ... it’s amazing how children will travel provided that getting in a car isn’t involved. 

 

 

[south_tyne]

9 hours ago, Steamport Southport said:

Never understood that one. Or OCD as it's called. Obsessive Cushion Desire.

 

 

Me neither.... although it's probably a cheaper hobby than OLD (obsessive loco desire) to be fair 

['CHARD]

On 24/03/2019 at 12:01, Gibbo675 said:

1. Men and women are of quite different types of energy, should they be of combined energies we would be androgyne as species.
2. Because of the different forms of energies involved in the make up of the genders that form a duality within the universal experience, the way the genders both experience and display materially any interests that define their specific energies will be different. In short trains are boys toys.
3. To further complicate matters despite that the male and female genders form a duality the recreation of the universal experience is actually made up from a triplicity of experience. With boys toys, as above mentioned, the male energy, part one, creates a system that represents part two,that system, part two, is then controlled by the male energy. It is this element of control that forms the third part of that triplicity which is the recreation part of the universal experience. In general most women do not seek to control the material realm to anything like the extent that most men do, they do however have greater interest and power over the etheric realm, (girls toys).

 

 

Do I dare mention the current era's prevailing belief that the issue of gender can't be reduced to 'duality.'

[MarkC]

On 23/03/2019 at 23:31, johnofwessex said:

At the expense of forum drift, what might the hobby be like if more women were involved?

Judging by comments frequently made:-

 

The air at exhibitions might smell better?

 

Hat, coat, gone... 

[Gibbo675]

3 hours ago, 'CHARD said:

 

Do I dare mention the current era's prevailing belief that the issue of gender can't be reduced to 'duality.'

Hi Chard,

 

Belief is a form of ignorance, you may either know or not know, a duality in and of itself.

 

I would also suggest that the negation of the laws of nature is a ridiculous fantasy, which should you do so proves that you are already along the path of self denial.

 

To align ones self with the current fad that is political correctness, which has sadly affected so many virtue signalling fools, is to self censor, therefore allowing for the immediate curtailment of all forms of discussion upon all sorts of interesting and important topics. Do please mention away while all the time being human about it.

 

Me Too !!!!

 

Gibbo.

 

[Doncaster]

 

 

On 25/03/2019 at 23:46, Steamport Southport said:

BTW there have always been some talented lady modellers out there. One of the first layouts I liked was Eastbourne built by Vivien Thompson. Didn't even occur to me at the time that a lady modeller was rare.

 

 

Jason

 

Vivien Thompson was a prolific modeller back in my teenage years in the 70s.  Her output seemed phenomenal.   There were masses of scratch built buildings and loads of other LBSCR stuff.  A shining light at the time.  I believe she resurfaced in the RM a few years ago.  I do hope she's still modelling. 

 

More recently, Maggie Gravett has emerged as an inspirational lady modeller.  She is a very approachable demonstrator. 

 

They are there but sadly few and far between.  The "Joy of Train Sets" programme saw the hobby as a very male space.  I'm lucky my good lady has no problem with my modelling.

 

I don't think our hobby is unwelcoming or anti, we have plenty of transgender modellers who seem to be comfortable in our company.  And that's a good thing.  Rather I think that it hasn't appealed as a mainstream hobby for women.

 

Vernon

[Chamby]

On 22/03/2019 at 22:43, Gibbo675 said:

Hi Chaps,

 

I've just stumbled across this thread and my experience of women is that rather unfortunately they come in three main basic types with an extremely elusive fourth category that I have yet to encounter:

1. Plain not interested.
2. Certifiably neurotic.
3. Morbidly miserable.
4. Pleasant.

Live in hope, die in despair !

 

Gibbo.

 

The 'elusive category 4' can indeed be found.  It helps a lot if you fit into the male version of that category...  

[nick_bastable]

On 23/03/2019 at 22:31, johnofwessex said:

At the expense of forum drift, what might the hobby be like if more women were involved?

exhibitions would smell nicer

 

Nick

[TheQ]

9 minutes ago, AVS1998 said:

 

I'd like to think the mean hair colour at a show may not be solidly white...

 

 

 

 

Signal red,?

Caledonian Blue, ,?

Middle Chrome Green,,?

 Stroudley Improved engine green?

 

[Steamport Southport]

1 hour ago, AVS1998 said:

 

I'd like to think the mean hair colour at a show may not be solidly white...

 

And I imagine if there were more women in our midst, we'd potentially have more specialist interests? The handful of fellow lady-modellers I know are all pre-grouping or independent/fictional company modellers, with their own specific sets of skills or talents. That isn't to say that men don't possess these talents - they verily do, and demonstrate them frequently - but it would be interesting to see a different take on things. 

 

Otherwise, I just foresee the same standards of modelling produced by any other modeller, regardless of gender. 

 

Although I will say the smattering of female representatives we have in the pre-grouping corner certainly pour a very unique type of humour into the pot, and I enjoy it. 

 

 

 

I'm wondering whether that's because  females generally prefer brighter colours. The same applies to youngsters, many of whom want to model pre-grouping, fictional or current liveries. 

 

With us blokes it's all black, maroon, Brunswick green and BR Blue. Nice simple, dull colours. Even most men who model pre grouping seem to go for the railways that had dull colours such as the LNWR, MR, NER, L&Y and GWR.

 

 

 

Jason