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Dating, women and the 'hobby'...


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I certainly sympathise with the hearing, although I've never been able to hear as high as you , I'm extremely sensitive to the level of sound. I could never go into a disco as I found the music sound level painful to the ears.

Even today I take earplugs with me if I go to a dinner where music will be played. As it is once the chat starts and lots of people start talking everywhere I get overload, and withdraw from conversations.

 

It's a bit of a problem at exhibitions, especially if I'm standing next to a fully sound fitted layout and I tend to head for a corner out of the way during the most crowded times. As I hate crowds anyway, its often time for a long tea or lunch break.

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19 hours ago, Grizz said:

Dating, Women and ‘the Hobby’..

 

Let’s face it in the past ‘the hobby’ has suffered from what is now referred to as ‘Image Issues’. And not without justification.
This has not helped in the dating stakes for some. Although as some have previously said it is slightly more acceptable today.
 

After passing an initial, very discreet, comment to me regarding this episode nothing else was said, but Mrs Grizz and I later talked at some length about the show and the characterful nature of some of the attendees. She asked why you don’t see these people on a daily basis in the street. To be clear she wasn’t being derogatory or unkind in her comments, possibly a bit shocked. Couldn’t really answer her question. . What is it about ‘the hobby’ that attracts people of a certain appearance and, for want of a better word, Smell?????? They seem to be drawn to model railways, railways, steam and diesel galas in general and possibly buses? 
 

Anyone else noticed this? Is it something that is peculiar to the UK? I have travelled extensively on railways in Northern Europe and hung around railway stations taking photos etc and been to numerous model railway events and museums etc and yet I have never seen the equivalent obsessive, often disheveled type of character? 
 

 

 

Firstly on the "image" problem, many years ago (probably the 80s) I took my Dad to a Model Railway Exhibition at the Wembley Conference Centre.  I had an interest in modelling, more plastic kits at the time, but Dad was a keen railway modeller.  At the same time there was a country music festival at the Empire Pool (I think it's called the Wembley Arena nowadays), so there were country music fans dressed as cowboys, complete with (I assume) replica six-shooters and covered in rhinestones, walking by and taking the piss out of those playing with "toy trains".  The irony was not lost on me.

 

On the second point about less hygienic characters at shows, I still make scale models and these folk are a regular subject of discussion on the modelling forums.  They do not just frequent model railway shows.  I cannot explain their behaviour, though one hopes they are at least washing their hands at the moment.

 

As to seeing these unfortunates "in the street", I have encountered several, both male and female, over the years at work, so I think you can assume they are about in the community. 

 

jch

 

 

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Mention of hearing difficulties associated with Autism reminded me. Although my hearing is normal, I do not require hearing aids I do tend to have the volume tuned up on the radio and TV as other sounds tend to drown them out, other people speaking alongside me even if quietly.

Edited by PhilJ W
fat finger syndrome
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Roger the Rabbit, the film is derived from a novel called “Who Censored Roger Rabbit?”

 

Americans definitely don’t understand this particular reference, or indeed the one to his sea-going cousin. I’ve played the Pugwash tune a couple of times at sessions in the US and just pass it off as “a traditional British hornpipe”. 

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I have a niece who turned down a rather well meaning chap on the grounds that he lived with his mother, and had a model railway. Considering that she is twice divorced and has seven kids by three different fathers, I’d say he was ahead of the game....

 

A while ago, a doubtless well-intentioned social worker instilled the idea that she might be “on the spectrum”. One of her children certainly has clear symptoms. She was told by several relatives that she would be well advised to leave This particular contribution aside; I’m inclined to agree. Her late mother was a notably deficient judge of the male character, and “what would you expect” seems to cover it when she needs assístance. 

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3 hours ago, PhilJ W said:

Mention of hearing difficulties associated with Autism reminded me. Although my hearing is normal, I do not require hearing aids I do tend to have the volume tuned up on the radio and TV as other sounds tend to drown them out, other people speaking alongside me even if quietly.

 

My Dad used to have that issue, and I have noticed that I can be similar but with me, lately I have given up watching things if someone else is in a conversation at the same time as I can't concentrate on the one thing. I used to be able to but after I hit the last burnout it has been noticeable.

 

One thing I rarely ever do is to switch a radio on in the car while I am driving, and once when driving to a place where I had to take two others and find the place we were going, one guy happened to have a satnav on his phone. Well... No way could I follow the sat navs instructions because the messages were coming too fast for my mind to process while I was driving. I have always used a map because I have a mind which thinks in pictures, so I pull in somewhere, look at a map and study the next couple of miles and remember it, and move on like that...

But the day of the guys satnav was unreal. On this large roundabout that came off the M4 in the Bridgend area there were around 150 armed guards surrounding the roundabout as some world leader happened to be visiting Newport which was around 30 miles away. What they must have thought of us on that day "Acting suspiciously" going round the roundabout six times on and off as I kept taking wrong lanes trying to listen to the satnav ladies voice but by the time the next instruction sankin with the other guys trying to tell me getting nurvous themselves as we were attracting attention... All those voices! Haha! And those big guns... I was glad that we did find the place we were looking for! :D

 

 

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2 hours ago, rockershovel said:

Roger the Rabbit, the film is derived from a novel called “Who Censored Roger Rabbit?”

 

Americans definitely don’t understand this particular reference, or indeed the one to his sea-going cousin. I’ve played the Pugwash tune a couple of times at sessions in the US and just pass it off as “a traditional British hornpipe”. 

 

I'm afraid the references in Captain Pugwash is an urban myth.

 

The characters were...

 

Captain Horatio Pugwash

Master Mate

Barnabas

Willy

Tom The Cabin Boy

Cut Throat Jake

 

 

Only one of those is remotely risqué.

 

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Captain_Pugwash#Libel_case_regarding_double_entendres

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On 28/12/2020 at 02:28, Steamport Southport said:

I wonder whether I would have better success if I changed my Tinder photo?

 

Might start using this one. All the hot babes will be queuing up. :D

 

spacer.png

That looks disturbingly like my father in his later years, and he was never short of female company (to the extent that I felt obliged to hide evidence, in order to spare the feelings of his widow, when I cleared out his car after he died. 

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1 hour ago, Steamport Southport said:

I think I should clarify that's not me and it might not work if you're not well up on UK popular culture. :prankster:

 

It's Roy Cropper, the oddball trainspotter from Coronation Street.....

 

Roy Cropper is an interesting character. He isn’t stupid, not by any means. Considering the sundry misadventures of the fools, alcoholics, wheeler-dealers, philanderers, bigamists, gangsters, abusers and occasional murderers who seem to make up most of the male population of Soapland, you might feel that he was ahead of the game, most of the time. He has never been in prison, had drink problems, been bankrupt or divorced (as far as we know)  or even had a train or aircraft land on his head. 

 

He is generous, but not a soft touch. He is not smartly dressed, but always clean and tidy in his person. He is in regular employment at what (we can only assume) is a modestly successful, self-owned business. He is an empathetic character and a good listener, sometimes acting as a foil to the garrulous cloud-cuckoo-lander Mary. He is confident without being boastful. 

 

From occasional implications, the female characters regard him highly, and there seems to be a considerable female fan base for him. 

 

 

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12 minutes ago, rockershovel said:

 

Roy Cropper is an interesting character. He isn’t stupid, not by any means. Considering the sundry misadventures of the fools, alcoholics, wheeler-dealers, philanderers, bigamists, gangsters, abusers and occasional murderers who seem to make up most of the male population of Soapland, you might feel that he was ahead of the game, most of the time. He has never been in prison, had drink problems, been bankrupt or divorced (as far as we know)  or even had a train or aircraft land on his head. 

 

He is generous, but not a soft touch. He is not smartly dressed, but always clean and tidy in his person. He is in regular employment at what (we can only assume) is a modestly successful, self-owned business. He is an empathetic character and a good listener, sometimes acting as a foil to the garrulous cloud-cuckoo-lander Mary. He is confident without being boastful. 

 

From occasional implications, the female characters regard him highly, and there seems to be a considerable female fan base for him. 

 

 

From memory, and it's a long time since Corrie or any other soap was watched chez MarkC, Roy is autistic; specifically Aspergers. As dad to an Aspie daughter, who is now 25 & doing very well, I have to say that, again from memory, he portrays the many nuances of an Aspie pretty well.

 

Mark

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21 minutes ago, rockershovel said:

 

Roy Cropper is an interesting character. He isn’t stupid, not by any means. Considering the sundry misadventures of the fools, alcoholics, wheeler-dealers, philanderers, bigamists, gangsters, abusers and occasional murderers who seem to make up most of the male population of Soapland, you might feel that he was ahead of the game, most of the time. He has never been in prison, had drink problems, been bankrupt or divorced (as far as we know)  or even had a train or aircraft land on his head. 

 

He is generous, but not a soft touch. He is not smartly dressed, but always clean and tidy in his person. He is in regular employment at what (we can only assume) is a modestly successful, self-owned business. He is an empathetic character and a good listener, sometimes acting as a foil to the garrulous cloud-cuckoo-lander Mary. He is confident without being boastful. 

 

From occasional implications, the female characters regard him highly, and there seems to be a considerable female fan base for him. 

 

 

 

You need to get out more, you're taking soap crap far too seriously!!

Mike.

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16 minutes ago, Enterprisingwestern said:

 

You need to get out more, you're taking soap crap far too seriously!!

Mike.

 

We have, in fact, lately reached the understanding that (as she has now mastered technology more complex than a light switch, and worked out how the “catch up” button works) my good wife doesn’t need to have this rubbish on continuously, evening after evening. I’m quite relived about this: it was getting to the point that I only came in the house to sleep. 

 

A quick google turns up the information that the original character was only signed for six episodes, and was a fairly unpleasant individual, mainly written as a stalker. The character is not specifically described as having Asperger Syndrome in any “canon” source. 

 

In some ways, he has developed as a counter-point to the increasing lurid and implausible melodrama which the medium generally, has embraced. 

Edited by rockershovel
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We exhibited a large Hornby 0 gauge clockwork layout a Blandford a few years ago.  The mayor, who was a young lady, went round the exhibition at lunch time and then she spent the whole afternoon watching us play with the clockwork trains which she found fascinating.  The trains bore little resemblance to the prototype but they don't need to as a Hornby 0 gauge train is the real thing.

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Good and a funnily prickly subject.

 

I think my missus sees the technical side of it all from here on RM Web - she realises that away from the nerdishness there is quite a bit of real talent and expertise not to mention the fact that the "hobby" is an industry in itself. Sold a few Micro Layouts years back which helped pay for a few decent holidays one of which was (conveniently) near Pecorama Devon where the gardens are exceptional.

 

She didn't get the "trainspotting" side of things at all although explaining Bashing still doesn't go in -  not even the camaraderie and adventure of being stuck on Todmorden in the drizzle at 4am

 

The only problem is the Preservation side of it at well known venues in the North West and South West of England when copious amounts of beer is involved :D

 

Ian

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I think the list of Music Industry types has softened the perception  - we all know who these are but to my missus Jools Holland came as quite a surprise - she likes the You Tube clip of Pete getting stuck in to his layout with his mates round doing a bit of ballasting  like an ordinary old bloke - excellent and worth a view.

 

Ian

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I have not had much luck with dating ladies but my friend took an attractive lady to the Severn Valley Railway and she thoroughly enjoyed it.  She even managed to persuade an engine driver to let her into the cab of a locomotive at Hampton Load station.  We had a few drinks at Bridgnorth and on the train and had a walk along the footpath by the track to Highley.  She gave me a hug at the end of the day.

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1 hour ago, Crisis Rail said:

The only problem is the Preservation side of it at well known venues in the North West and South West of England when copious amounts of beer is involved :D

 

Ian

 

The problem at the moment is that Covid has resulted in copious amounts of beer ceasing to be available (unless served with a scotch egg).

 

I think what puts ladies off preservation sites is general appearance of Steptoe's Yard (good name for a layout?) with lines of rolling stock all awaiting possible restoration and sharp bits of rusty metal lying about.  Whilst they might be persuaded to see some beauty in Victorian engineering, the same can't be said for Victorian sanitary arrangements.

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Four years ago when we took Lancaster Green Ayre to Lancaster and exhibited it in the central library, one of the local MP's, an attractive young lady, spent a lot of time by the layout.  She even came back on the 2nd day with her father in tow. She wanted her husband to build her a model railway.  If I had been some 40 years younger and single I might have volunteered.

 

Jamie

 

 

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Last night I realized one of the reasons why I have found it so difficult to ask a girl out. I tend to get mindblank if I try to talk directly, especially if I am nurvous, so I usually avoid direct conversations. I automatically keep going off on tangents to avoid hitting mindblank. 

Also, I miss some of the obvious flirting signs that women do and I can't tell the difference between a flirt and a lady just being nice, so I assume they are being nice. 

It has been pointed out to me many times by others who have noticed ladies flirting with me and i did not know! Why do they tell me AFTER the event?  But also, when a lady has to make it soo obvious that I can't ignore it I think they are being far too forward and I run a mile! :D

 

Finding a lady who likes trains is like discovering gold. Finding a lady that is available and likes trains and likes me is...  (Any word I can use here as I can't think?)

Edited by Mountain Goat
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14 minutes ago, Mountain Goat said:

It has been pointed out to me many times by others who have noticed ladies flirting with me and i did not know! Why do they tell me AFTER the event?  But also, when a lady has to make it soo obvious that I can't ignore it I think they are being far too forward and I run a mile! :D

This reflects being on the spectrum, I suspect.  I can see identical behaviour in myself, I probably only started to understand physical cues of body language in early middle age.  In fact throughout my life, I have only tended to "trust" anything written about me (i.e. in writing) rather than anything said, as I tended to assume I was misunderstanding, or people were just being nice and probably held a suspicion they thought otherwise, behind my back.  Not helped by the fact that in my youth, most of my age group did exactly that.

 

A railway enthusiast friend who had limited success with women, asked me if the lady he had met up with six times was likely to be interested in him.  I really had no clue, based on my lifetime of hopeless experiences at dating, but asked my wife.  Her response was something along the lines of, "She's agreed to meet him SIX times? Is she interested? Well, Duh!".

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51 minutes ago, Mountain Goat said:

 

 

Finding a lady who likes trains is like discovering gold. Finding a lady that is available and likes trains and likes me is...  (Any word I can use here as I can't think?)

As said in blackadder “ like finding a cat who speaks Norwegian. Even rarer “ 

I settled for availability and like me. She puts up with trains and scares herself on what she has picked up just being around me. She prefers trains with comfy seats, if she can have a sleep, if there is nice food and especially if there is nice booze, preferably bubbly.

richard

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