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The Sheep Chronicles : Chapter 5: Outwool. The Sheep goes East. These are the continuing adventures of Norman Lockhart, connoisseur of traditional British breakfasts and fine cream teas.


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49 minutes ago, NHY 581 said:

 

For the record, I find that I am not in such a position to confirm, or deny that any such conduct, unbecoming or otherwise, did or did not in fact take place.

 

Furthermore, ordinarily and without hesitation, I  would of course draw attention  to records held but it is with some regret that at this moment in time, it would appear that we are unable to locate said records which would of course shed light on such matters to the undeniable benefit of all parties concerned.  

 

Subsequently, without prejudice and whole heartedly in the spirit of furthering the further furtherance, so as to ensure the avoidance of any doubt, I feel that there is but little by way of an  alternative other than to make direct reference to the utterances alluded to above. I would therefore, respectfully draw attention to what many consider to be a well known fact, by agreement I'm sure, in that it is widely and well documented in popular culture that , put simply and without any form of embellishment, sheep bleat, not heckle.

 

Therefore it would appear to be only right and proper to conclude that this whole unfortunate, regretable anď some might say, tawdry episode would appear to come down to that of  a simple case of mistaken identity. 

 

 

Thank you Sir Humphrey  

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On 22/10/2020 at 10:45, MrWolf said:

Also, calling cousin Rhydian for directions could have resulted in questions such as "Where are you to?" Causing yet more confusion.

Did he ever say "If you're coming here, I would'na start from there". :jester:

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2 hours ago, NHY 581 said:

 

For the record, I find that I am not in such a position to confirm, or deny that any such conduct, unbecoming or otherwise, did or did not in fact take place.

 

Furthermore, ordinarily and without hesitation, I  would of course draw attention  to records held but it is with some regret that at this moment in time, it would appear that we are unable to locate said records which would of course shed light on such matters to the undeniable benefit of all parties concerned.  

 

Subsequently, without prejudice and whole heartedly in the spirit of furthering the further furtherance, so as to ensure the avoidance of any doubt, I feel that there is but little by way of an  alternative other than to make direct reference to the utterances alluded to above. I would therefore, respectfully draw attention to what many consider to be a well known fact, by agreement I'm sure, in that it is widely and well documented in popular culture that , put simply and without any form of embellishment, sheep bleat, not heckle.

 

Therefore it would appear to be only right and proper to conclude that this whole unfortunate, regretable anď some might say, tawdry episode would appear to come down to that of  a simple case of mistaken identity. 

 

 

I couldn't have put that better myself!

 

I might try to have a go though, later.

 

In the meantime, what you don't need is anything from the East, the South or the North. You need something from the West, young man and it begins with a 'Pa' or 'Pe' (although an 'Av' would suit equally well, if you were able to find one).

 

 

 

 

And in any case, Toads to the lot of you!

 

 

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2 hours ago, NHY 581 said:

put simply and without any form of embellishment, sheep bleat, not heckle.

 

1)     Heckling – heckling was originally the process of removing knots from wool by combing the raw fleeces. Dundee was a centre for textile processing in the nineteenth century, and its workers were renowned for their radical and combative trade unionism. Thus, the process by which they ‘teased’ and ‘combed’ political speeches by shouting out objection and observations became known as heckling.

2)     Book sizes – if you are reading this on an ipad or e-reader, the size of the screen is linked to the dimensions of a sheep. Or, more correctly, the dimensions of a killed, skinned and stretched sheep. Sheepskin was commonly used to make books (vellum, from the skin of calfs, was premium stuff reserved for the classiest of publications). Take one sheepskin, trim it down to the size of a rectangle and fold it in half three times and you get the rough size of a modern hardback book. Or ipad.

 

https://www.vaguelyinteresting.co.uk/sheep-and-the-dimensions-of-the-ipad/

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55 minutes ago, Stubby47 said:

 

1)     Heckling – heckling was originally the process of removing knots from wool by combing the raw fleeces. Dundee was a centre for textile processing in the nineteenth century, and its workers were renowned for their radical and combative trade unionism. Thus, the process by which they ‘teased’ and ‘combed’ political speeches by shouting out objection and observations became known as heckling.

2)     Book sizes – if you are reading this on an ipad or e-reader, the size of the screen is linked to the dimensions of a sheep. Or, more correctly, the dimensions of a killed, skinned and stretched sheep. Sheepskin was commonly used to make books (vellum, from the skin of calfs, was premium stuff reserved for the classiest of publications). Take one sheepskin, trim it down to the size of a rectangle and fold it in half three times and you get the rough size of a modern hardback book. Or ipad.

 

https://www.vaguelyinteresting.co.uk/sheep-and-the-dimensions-of-the-ipad/

 

 

Whilst acknowledging your kind observations as detailed above in the initial point of your  most recent of recent correspondence,  which of course should be regarded as being duly noted  and received, I would respectfully put forth and would ask you to consider, or not as the case may or may not be, the notion that we should or otherwise regard that the matter to which you refer in the first part is that which is, at best or in fact not so, the modern and common interpretation of the terminology rather than the original discourse so offered. 

 

I would therefore ask due consideration be given to the fact that the original meaning of the term being ovine related is simply that of a coincidence and nothing more and not something I can be  held to account for or in fact one that should be taken into account. It is simply an attempt to make capital by virtue of said coincidence. Nothing more, nothing less. 

 We should be mindful that one Swallow does not a Summer make.

As such I would promote the notion that this be disregarded as a consequence arising from the first part of both parts but not abutting to the second part, the part which I will come onto after addressing those matters arising from the first part of said both parts. 

Moving onto the most recent adoption of the phrase, one should take the view, or not, as it suits either way, that which was described as and I may make so bold as to quote the exact phrase as being that of 'incessant heckling' is simply and unassailably so, incorrect and not something we are able to recall as such. 

 

What may or may not have been offered and this is in no way to be considered as such, was nothing more as an attempt to avoid an extremely unfortunate and erroneous course of conduct which could only been of detriment to all those involved. 

 

In respect of the  second part of the first part above, I would venture that this is nothing more than a vacuous, yes vacuous attempt at the utterance of what quite simply constitutes very unseemly menaces which quite frankly merits little more than a raised eyebrow which rest assured is duly raised in neither dramatic nor provocative fashion but by way of this simple gesture being simply one of, and I dare to articulate but feel compelled to venture forth, one of abject disappointment. 

 

Edited by NHY 581
Clarity.
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4 hours ago, Captain Kernow said:

I couldn't have put that better myself!

 

I might try to have a go though, later.

 

In the meantime, what you don't need is anything from the East, the South or the North. You need something from the West, young man and it begins with a 'Pa' or 'Pe' (although an 'Av' would suit equally well, if you were able to find one).

 

 

 

 

And in any case, Toads to the lot of you!

 

 

 

I have found that whilst trundling around the local moors on the BSA, (looking for all the world like the couple on the 1949 advert, me dressed up in tweeds and briar pipe like Kenneth Moore and Miss Riding Hood wearing a cute little hat  with a feather in it) that sheep are impervious to the horn and the antediluvian roar emanating from the exhausts.

Not even the distinct possibility of being ground into Katt-o-meat by one of Small Heath's iron horses seems to ruffle their fleece and they remain resolutely in the road.

If however, one gets up really close and having selected the Alpha sheep, one yells "Pannier!" at it with gusto, the entire flock scatter in panicked disarray. 

I was initially sceptical about using this tactic as we are well into LNWR territory. 

As you are a notable expert on ovine psychology, I thought I would bring it to your attention as it may give us further insight into why sheep always look like they're about to say something profound, but never do.

 

I look forward to hearing from you at your earliest convenience etc etc...

 

Sincerely

Lt. R. Kitts-Wolfe

 

Edited by MrWolf
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1 hour ago, NHY 581 said:

Whilst acknowledging your kind observations as detailed above in the initial point of your  most recent of recent correspondence, .......................  and I dare to articulate but feel compelled to venture forth, one of abject disappointment. 

I hope Admin have taken note of this exemplary reply and have it to hand to use as a reply to defeat any future contributor who is/has over-steeped the bounds of dedecensy, I think.... 
Time for another pint me thinks.

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8 minutes ago, MrWolf said:

As you are a notable expect on ovine psychology, I thought I would bring it to your attention as it may give us further insight into why sheep always look like they're about to say something profound, but never do.

Come again?

At The Bwlch, Nr. Brecon.


 

The Bwlch Sheep.jpg

Edited by Penlan
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3 hours ago, NHY 581 said:

Whilst acknowledging your kind observations as detailed above in the initial point of your  most recent of recent correspondence,  which of course should be regarded as being duly noted  and received, I would respectfully put forth and would ask you to consider, or not as the case may or may not be, the notion that we should or otherwise regard that the matter to which you refer in the first part is that which is, at best or in fact not so, the modern and common interpretation of the terminology rather than the original discourse so offered. 

 

I would therefore ask due consideration be given to the fact that the original meaning of the term being ovine related is simply that of a coincidence and nothing more and not something I can be  held to account for or in fact one that should be taken into account. It is simply an attempt to make capital by virtue of said coincidence. Nothing more, nothing less. 

 We should be mindful that one Swallow does not a Summer make.

As such I would promote the notion that this be disregarded as a consequence arising from the first part of both parts but not abutting to the second part, the part which I will come onto after addressing those matters arising from the first part of said both parts. 

Moving onto the most recent adoption of the phrase, one should take the view, or not, as it suits either way, that which was described as and I may make so bold as to quote the exact phrase as being that of 'incessant heckling' is simply and unassailably so, incorrect and not something we are able to recall as such. 

 

What may or may not have been offered and this is in no way to be considered as such, was nothing more as an attempt to avoid an extremely unfortunate and erroneous course of conduct which could only been of detriment to all those involved. 

 

In respect of the  second part of the first part above, I would venture that this is nothing more than a vacuous, yes vacuous attempt at the utterance of what quite simply constitutes very unseemly menaces which quite frankly merits little more than a raised eyebrow which rest assured is duly raised in neither dramatic nor provocative fashion but by way of this simple gesture being simply one of, and I dare to articulate but feel compelled to venture forth, one of abject disappointment. 

Half a pound of sausages.

 

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2 hours ago, MrWolf said:

If however, one gets up really close and having selected the Alpha sheep, one yells "Pannier!" at it with gusto, the entire flock scatter in panicked disarray. 

 

 

On a school trip many decades ago, some of my class mates (not me, honest guv) found that uttering the phrase "Mint Sauce" had a similar effect.

 

Adrian

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53 minutes ago, Siberian Snooper said:

Were you in Plympton, this lunchtime? The vehicle infront of me as I exited Marsh Mills roundabout had this registration **20 EWE, I assume it's your personal plate.

 

 

Some one told me some time back, that in certain parts of the country where sheep farming is popular, registrations with EWE and RAM are quite popular.  Someone with nothing better to do might consider applying for a grant to investigate this.

 

Adrian

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9 minutes ago, Mick Bonwick said:

There's a distinct lack of modelling going on here.

 

Just in case anybody is feeling bereft, here's a thingy-whatsit:

 

IMG_3046_Cropped.JPG.a25f83f60d4f353c36c9bc41fc6b3e35.JPG

 

BAA! Run for your lives! It's one of them motorbike things!

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2 hours ago, Mick Bonwick said:

There's a distinct lack of modelling going on here.

 

Just in case anybody is feeling bereft, here's a thingy-whatsit:

 

IMG_3046_Cropped.JPG.a25f83f60d4f353c36c9bc41fc6b3e35.JPG

 

Now then Mick, there's rules about that sort of obscenity. Tut tut.

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19 hours ago, NHY 581 said:

Morning all. 

 

Today, at some point, we may enter a perilous period. 

 

I am going to the train shop, somewhere I have not been for a number of weeks. 

 

I have of course prepared a list and will not deviate from it............Nope. Will not. Nothing will tempt me otherwise.....

 

Rob. 

 

It is with some degree of regret I would advise that planned trip to train shop did not take place. 

With some thirty minutes left to go before my shift ended, I was advised that a further eight hours of my time was sought.

 

Therefore, I have just returned home after a further nine hours......... 

 

I thank you. 

 

Rob 

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  • NHY 581 changed the title to The Sheep Chronicles : Chapter 5: Outwool. The Sheep goes East. These are the continuing adventures of Norman Lockhart, connoisseur of traditional British breakfasts and fine cream teas.

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