A man boards the Caledonian Sleeper and tells the attendant "I have to get off the train at Perth. I'm a heavy sleeper, but I must get off there. I don't care what I say, make sure you put me off."
He wakes up the next morning to find that the train is pulling into Inverness. Enraged, he finds the attendant and gives him a piece of his mind before storming off to the ticket office, still turning the air blue.
Another passenger says to the attendant, "You're very patient, mate, I wouldn't have tolerated such abuse."
"That's nothing," the attendant says, "You should have heard the bloke I put off at Perth!"