Approaching retirement

[APOLLO]

40 minutes ago, Gilbert said:

I'll just leave this here...get a dog that's a train spotter. Exercise and trains plus companionship and something to care about.

 

 

Is he/she a wagon spotter by any chance ?

 

 

Cats, dogs and gunpowder - what could possibly go wrong ?

 

Brit15

[SamThomas]

I'm well past retirement age & went "full time retired" about 18 months ago.

 

Plenty (in fact more than enough) to do but I felt I had "lost my purpose" in life. I'm not really one for exercise & felt both my physical & mental health were possibly declining. Mrs T stated that my demise would be earlier than I thought if I did not "do something" about it.

 

So, I found a part time, 3 x days a week HGV driving. Certainly, the 03:00H starts are a bit of a pain, but I'm out there doing something I love - driving, driving something that many other people could not. I stop & help other road users & drive my vehicle in a manner that can only improve the image of the logistics industry. I feel my physical & mental health is much better (as Mrs T will testify -= she no longer plots my demise). When driving home after a shift I reflect on a day well done. Sometimes, I get unnecessary grief from a shop but hey, next week they may want a favour "can you put that round the back ?" "no, sorry sir we only have to deliver it to the front door" - or "can you take this out of date food back ?" "no, sorry sir we have run out of waste transfer notes". (Moral here is the delivery driver can be your best friend or worse enemy).

Double manned days can be that much of a laugh if you are paired with someone with a GSOF that it goes quickly - most jobs are what you make of it anyway.

I do actually meet some great people, work with some great guys (as an aside I also meet a fair amount of stupid people, mostly driving other vehicles). I get some exercise & fresh air, paid for by other people.

 

So, my advice to retiree's is to keep occupled, find something regular to do away from our collective hobby (that should always remain a hobby) - look to the past - anything you have fancied doingg - play the piono ? (or other musical instrument, then take up some lessons, flying, like Koi Carp - anything you always fancied doing but work got in the way then take it up or at least look into it. Maybe something with your good lady, ballroom dancing maybe.

Whatever you do don't vegitate.

 

You have earned your retirement - enjoy it.

[MyRule1]

I took redundancy/retired back in 2010 but we are all different so my experience, and thus advice, may not suit every one. My interests were such that  the time I  could spare was taken up with volunteering with a number of organisations. In addition I kept my mental abilities going with a number of free courses available through the interest, physically I joined the local ramblers, Through volunteering I am now in a post I really enjoy and feel I am doing "good".

[AndrueC]

13 hours ago, Andy Kirkham said:

The guys I envy are those who have had a lifelong passion for golf or fishing, for whom every duty of adult life has been to them nothing but an impediment to an existence of continuous golf or fishing, and for whom, freed from the wearisome obligation to work, their life is now a joyous carnival of uninterrupted golf or fishing. Such people seem to be amongst the happiest I have met. 

Lol. The great thing about is golf is that you always have some aspect of your game that you would like to improve. The bad thing about golf is that there are days when there are some aspects of your game that you have to improve.

 

The trick is to accept the bad days

Edited October 31, 2021 by AndrueC

[alastairq]

My position is quite different from most of the above.

After 3 divorces [not all at the same time!!]....and a sorting of others financial difficulties [I'm not affeared of financial difficulty...any more]....I find myself no longer a property 'owner', but in the private rental sphere.

 

So, income-wise, my somewhat sparse pensions have to cover a significant rent cost.

 

I didn't have to give up work [from my last job].

Indeed, even from a health perspective, I could have kept on turning up, and drawing a salary, for a good 10 or more years after I actually ceased work. Indeed there were some of my 'colleagues' who were well into their late 70's!    [Recruitment is, & was, a constant difficulty, with stringent pre-conditions being applied to the 'job' that made things awkward in that respect.]

 

However, there came a time when I really knew I wanted to leave the workplace environment.  

{ I strongly believe there are three stages to life....school, work, and so-called 'retirement'....and in my experience, no stage has any particular relevance to any other stage!  ]

It helps when one reaches the third stage, to have already had good practice at reverting to one's childhood....Second or third childhoods are beneficial!

 

But, there was a definite feeling of having 'had enough'....

I know of colleagues who planned  their 'futures' by having 'targets'....[ie, when I get to 25 years , or such & such an age, etc]

 

The discovery that pensions don't suddenly 'jump' when one reaches 20, or 30 years of contribution....so actually calling it a 'day and leaving at 19 years 8 months doesn't make diddly-squat difference to one's monthly income!!

 

It was a case [on my part] of deciding what I did need, and what I no longer needed.

 

So for me, so-called 'retirement' became, in my mind's eye, the third stage of life....where the pressures imposed by society concerning 'work', and 'contribution,' could be disposed of completely.

There came a time when I sat down and said, ''why not?''

So, I left work, and the working environment, behind me.

To the extent I'm not sure I could even survive very long in a new working environment??

As soon as DVLA asked me to go for a medical for my vocational licenses, I took the step of returning them......I viewed it as taking away the 'temptation'.

I can still get them back...and, given the last 20 years of employment, no driving test in this country holds any fears for me ......but, thus far, I've not been tempted.

I spend my days, playing around with my stuff, be that model railways, or my old cars [of which I have several]...

Living alone [a choice, not an outcome]...there are domestic duties I need to perform....I have my family, present & past...who manage to require my attentions on a regular basis, and I have good relationships with all my Ex's...

Covid and it's attendant changes held little or nothing  in the way of  problems for me [I have never been infected]....

Yup, I watch the pennies, acutely.....so I cannot do stuff merely on a whim, if it involves a cost....which really doesn't bother me at all.

The house I rent has all that I need, for the moment. [Here's hoping the landlord doesn't want to try to raise the rent, etc?}...garden, plenty of drive space for my projects, a rural environment, workshop, etc....all of which I know I would have struggled with if I had still been in the property-owning market....

Neighbours who provide entertainment rather than issues......

 

In other words, rather than being labelled as 'retired', I'm sure psychologists would label me as a 'drop-out' from society...and all its superficialities.

 

I'm warm of a winter's night [log fire, free from a friendly tree surgeon, who I helped out  a while back]...I eat well enough , without any  need for 'fancy' foods...I get my clothes from a good workplace attire spot, so they last [better than Matalan!!]....since I really do not care how I appear in the eyes of others.

All this amounts to, is a rejection of what was 'expected' by the rest of society at large, of someone like me.

 have transport [even if some of it is over 70 years old, and without a heater!]

 

I don't  feel the need to seek out groups of others....to adapt my behaviors to comply with an accepted 'norm'......

So maybe I'm anti social at heart? Who knows!  My son must get his Asperger's [autism] from somewhere. Maybe partly from me?

 

I must admit to adjusting what I do now, to suit an aching body, even more so these days.....I'm not one for deliberately going off walking or riding....Chopping logs, and getting from one end of the garden to the other  many times a day does that for me, I suspect?

 

Also, shunning the advantages of living within a vast housing estate, or a big conurbation, means I have no real desires to hurtle off ''somewhere else'' just for  a 'change'...a 'break?'

Indeed, I have no real desires to go and enjoy someone else's part of the world!!  

Indeed, if I ever found myself wanting to be somewhere else all the time, I would go & live there!

 

So I have little advice regarding ''retirement' other than, if one hasn't acquired the frame of mind to leave the present 'world' behind, then carry on working.

 

If one has to seriously look for 'something to do' then now is not the time to retire!

 

Swapping one workplace for another isn't 'retiremetn' in my view.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

[Michael Hodgson]

2 hours ago, AndrueC said:

The great thing about is golf is that you always have some aspect of your game that you would like to improve.

Yep - the time spent at the 19th hole.

[Tim V]

The problem with golf is, that after a career (!) of 50 years playing the game, all you have to show for it is a set of rusty clubs, maybe some trophies.

 

Whereas with model railways (other hobbies are available) at least there is something tangible ...

[TheQ]

14 months to go or maybe, 17 months if I decide to stay until the end of Feb 2023 to collect the annual bonus.

 

 I'm too junior to be allowed to stay on part time, not that I want it.

 

My plans. 

I sail / race most Sundays, this will be expanded to include the Summer Saturday afternoon evening sundowner racing. (Emphasis on the sundowner)

I may volunteer for the Sailing School on Thursday afternoon evenings.

MRC is at the moment Friday evenings only, another evening will be included. Plus the home layout.

I intend to volunteer one day a week at the Radar Museum.

plus an acre and a half of garden /jungle.

 

So I've plenty to do .

 

SWMBO already spends most of two part days out at weaving or art clubs.. plus does a lot of that at home.

 

As for money I think we'll be OK, £2500 of not needed fuel costs to and from work helps. With that and my pensions, it's around 2/3s of current pay and over half of that is covered by the tax free allowance.

SWMBO is already on one pension and of course we will gain her part of the state pension soon after, overall our Joint income will only a little below our current income.

 

We too live away from housing estates, being retired will allow more log chopping but spread over more time.. no hurry on a weekend..

 

 

 

[4901]

Look after your health - adequate sleep, healthy food, exercise.  Having social contacts is vital to one' outlook on life.  Keep in touch with family.  A wonderful advantage of retirement is if you stay up late or are really tired, sleep some more.  Keep a to-do list and plan your week so you don't just get up and think what should I do today.  And you can always put off something to another day and not feel guilty.  Have things to look forward to.  Read the books you have never got round to reading.  Serving others (even the community) makes for a good day.  Keep your mind occupied.  Take further education courses.  (My wife took a course in micro-biology and when the pandemic struck, she was able to understand the scientific advice and weed-out the myths.)   No TV before 5 pm except for Saturday, in my case.   

 

Have fun.

 

 

[Michael Hodgson]

2 hours ago, TheQ said:

14 months to go or maybe, 17 months if I decide to stay until the end of Feb 2023 to collect the annual bonus.

 

 I'm too junior to be allowed to stay on part time, not that I want it.

 

 

So you're still in your probationary period are you?  

Mind there's somebody who's still serving an even longer apprenticeship ... the next King of England!

[Andy Hayter]

I cannot really offer any better advice than that already given - just experience.

 

Retired now for 8 years and because our house was always a project, the retirement/redundancy bonuses meant that the major jobs that had to be done by professionals could be financed.  The other long list of items/issues is a Work in Progress.  Even now the model railway projects are still very much projects rather than achievements although when I do have spare time then I crack on.

 

There were some unexpected things that happened on retirement.  My job had involved a lot  travelling and this allowed a lot of time to pick up a model railway magazine and read a few pages:  On the train/tram to the airport, that 30 minute wait at the airport gate for boarding, sat on the plane waiting for take-off when all electronic kit has to be shut down etc.   On retirement I have found I no longer have the time to read all of these magazines.  I don't seem to get the odd 20 minutes any more and I have cancelled probably half of the subscriptions that I had.   Strange having more time but less time to do some things.  

 

 My job involved a lot of travelling plus I was based in Germany but the house was in France so each weekend I would commute home.  I thought I might miss all of the travelling, meeting up with folk etc.  but since retirement I have made just one return flight (Warley) and I don't think I miss it at all.  

 

I did know what I wanted to do on retirement and had a long list of tasks - many now crossed off, some replaced with new tasks, but still a long list that will keep me busy for quite a while.

[Gilbert]

I very much identify with your point on reading time...constant backlogs and reduced subscriptions...and yes to those lists..

Chris

[AyJay]

Gosh! That is a strong response. Yet again, I seem to have touched a point that provoked a lot of interesting, and varied responses.

Thank you all for the humour, the soul-searching, sound advice and the honesty.

Let's kick off by 'borrowing' the thoughts of a master wordsmith:

 

"To move, or not to move, that is the question:
Whether 'tis better in the life to suffer
The expanse and pressing of invading neighbours,
Or to get packing against a sprawl of development,
And by moving end it."

 

Sorry, just had to be done.  I have also been known to play around with the work of that other great philosopher, John Lennon.

 

Mrs D is already retired.  It is also second time around for both of us and I moved in with her, so I never really saw this place as 'Mine'.  We are also both fixed in our ways, so there is no shortage of friction, but somehow we manage.

Mrs D hankers after moving south and west, get closer to the coast. Don't know why? I originate from the London/Essex borders and have sisters and their offspring scattered all across the south. I don't feel a calling to any particular area.

 

Numerous times, we have discussed the possibility of moving, find a place that belongs to both of us, have a fresh start.  Where we are is an expanding town, horrible soulless boxes going up everywhere. Also, on our road, we feel pressed on each side by neighbours, one of them not very nice. Our home is also not really a best fit for our lifestyle and is lacking privacy.

So the weight in that pan of the scales is saying 'Move'.

 

On the other pan of the scales is the security of what we already have, the risks of stepping out into the unknown and the financial cost of moving. Also, we are walking distance from the shops, including a supermarket and good transport links.

 

We don’t share any common interests. When we met, MrsD enjoyed better health, we would pootle about on bikes when we were dating. Now her health has taken a downturn and all she wants to do is watch daytime TV. One programme that has caught my eye is ‘Live life in the Country’, just to see what other places look like. Although I have pointed out that this is an unrealistic view because these properties are picked to present what is best in an area and the participants have a few £100k’s more than we do. However, I do like the look of Somerset/Dorset (Anyone down that way recommend a nice place that has the amenities and community a couple of over 60’s need?)

 

I have said all this because if we do decide to move, well that’s my retirement all mapped out.

Yes, a Will is important and we will need to see a solicitor. 2nd time around with offspring on both sides will probably make it complicated.  Due to the health issues, I think that I will be the last one standing and so I am working hard to maintain good links with my sisters numerous offspring, since my own are a serious letdown, thanks to the poison of their Mother.

If we did stay, since I am already a ‘Friend’ at Pendon, I would probably volunteer there. I have also suggested that we look for a dance class together.

There is one friend that I have made at my current employment, also a model railway enthusiast. We chat regularly over the phone and have gone to the Warley/Alexandra Palace exhibitions together; are currently considering travelling up for the Doncaster exhibition in February.

Well, it’s now time to get down to work. Got a lot to do today.

Been good chatting with you all.

 

[TheQ]

11 hours ago, Michael Hodgson said:

 

So you're still in your probationary period are you?  

Mind there's somebody who's still serving an even longer apprenticeship ... the next King of England!

Part time work is reserved for people of much higher status than me, even though I will have been here 15 years by the time I leave.. HR seem they can recruit calibration staff any time and at the level I am, think they can pick up the job in seconds.. They won't even advertise the job till the start of the month After I have left...

 

I've seen many move to Norfolk  on retirement.. it's not actually a good time to retire as you are left with no new circle of friends from work as a starting point. We moved here deliberately while still working, which allowed for extra expenses you find when you move and an Anchor point till you get established..

Moving South and West Is expensive, and was dismissed from our list early on even though I have relatives from Portsmouth through Wiltshire to Devon..

Edited November 1, 2021 by TheQ

[Zomboid]

34 minutes ago, AyJay said:

Now her health has taken a downturn and all she wants to do is watch daytime TV. One programme that has caught my eye is ‘Live life in the Country’, just to see what other places look like.

I'm sure I'm teaching you to suck eggs here, but the idyllic countryside life might not be the best if you've got health issues to handle - you're further from hospitals, doctors, ambulances... And it's entirely possible that one day you'll decide that you're no longer able to drive, so being out in the sticks away from any semblance of public transport may result in being even more cut off. And it's extremely likely that at some point one of you would be living there alone.

 

Of course you could move again as and when, but that'd be stress and expense which you probably won't want at the time of life when you don't feel able to drive and want to be nearer to services.

[alastairq]

I agree with Zomboid's observations, to an extent.

However, I also feel that 'stress' has a part to play in health issues.

 

I don't mean 'stress' in the usual sense, but the 'stress' of life & living where one is, at that moment?

 

I live rurally, in a small village with no immediate services...no bus [mile & a half walk to nearest, infrequent, bus route]..yet there are folk living locally, elderly, without personal transport, who manage quite well, for services.

By 'getting away' from the hubbub of today's society doesn't mean moving somewhere far far away, isolated from everything.

 

It can also mean, simply moving away to the nearest bit of coutnryside.

If I were to suffer a health episode, the responses  from the services would be little, if any, different to those if I were to live in a town, or on the edge of a large city.

Yet, I live at least 6 miles from the nearest 'town ' and all it contains.

 Much of this country's rural environment is within fairly easy access to necessary [health] services...no worse than the smaller towns in that respect, now that we have entered an era of centralisation.

Transport of the personal kind has improved by leaps & bounds over the years, albeit at a cost.  I'm talking about transport of the 'taxi' variety....Yes, costly, but the expense may not often be needed.  Cars still cost, one way or another, even if not used frequently?

Plus, there won't be many rural communities that haven't indulged in the self-help services, openly encouraged by local authorities? 

I suppose the point I am making is that there aren't many places in this country where one can live, far from the madding crowd, yet still be ''just round the corner?''

 

 

[Zomboid]

There's a bit more nuance than I stated. Where I live in Oxfordshire, a lot of villages have a pretty decent connection to the rest of the world. And some others have nothing.

 

But then on those TV shows your do see people who want to retire to rural Powys and live somewhere where there's nobody else for 2 miles, it's 5 to a shop and they rarely grit the roads in winter and that's a different proposition entirely.

 

There's a siding scale between those extremes, and the right place for one person won't be right for another. I'd just advise anyone to think about how remote they want to be in the longer term.

Edited November 1, 2021 by Zomboid

[AyJay]

Very true Zomboid. That is why I'm thinking of market towns, local shops, Supermarket, lively church, Hospital. clubs.

Hello Q. My eldest sister and hubby moved to Norfolk some years back, now he is very frail and their daughters live way down south.  Even aside from the geographical separation, I'm not sure it's wise to go too far down the property price gradient; you can never come back because it's too far uphill.

 

I suppose we could just abandon the idea and stay put. It's not a bad house, although the kitchen and bathroom are crying out for modernising, we share a driveway with several others and the only place I could build a railway was in an outdoor building (note to any nefarious persons:  Nothing valuable kept there when unattended); so with increasing fuel costs, any visit to my mancave in cold weather generates strong protest.

[sjp23480]

I am not really qualified to comment, having left full time employment at the start of the health crisis, I took 9 months off before getting back in the saddle to return to work, albeit on a part time basis and working for myself in a consulting capacity within my profession.  I now work about 70-80 hours a month, almost always from home and for the most part I am very happy.   Mrs SJP works full time so we manage to stay sane - as others have mentioned, its important for you both to have "me time".

 

Despite this, I still consider myself "time poor" - with a long list of things to do, when I get more time.  Almost everyone I know that has retired claim to not have enough time, so I am not sure how much you should worry about staying busy.

 

When it comes to your property situation, if you have not already done so, I would sit down with Mrs D and make a list of what you want, both in terms of the property and the location.  It is important that you are both honest with one another (and yourselves) as to what you want/need.  This may include: bungalow, house, apartment, new build, Victorian, number of bedrooms, railway room, garage, garden size , aspect, proximity to relatives, local amenities, transport links, affordability and so on.  Once I had our list, I put it away and went back to it after a week or so, this reflection time helped me clarify my thoughts.

 

This process will help you determine what you want and location.  You can then narrow your search and figure out what you can afford and if it meets your requirements.  Saving a search on a real estate website with all your criteria is a good way to figure out the market for your preferred property.  When I stopped work we did this and decided we would stay put, because our current house and location ticked most of our boxes and the risks of moving outweighed the possible advantages.

 

Not sure if this helps, but it enabled us to make a few decisions about our future and address our wanderlust.

 

Steve

 

 

[Andymsa]

Retirement is a very personal choice, from factors like health to finances. I can only speak from personal experience after taking early retirement. Having been a train driver for 42 years I just knew it was the right time to go, to have my play time whilst I am still in reasonable good health. I have seen too many who just stay on late in age and then retire and are not able to do the things they want anymore. Then there are those who retire only to pass away a few years later. We all work most of our lives to build a better home and pay for those things we like to do but on retirement suddenly the drive and direction and purpose is removed, so I would say the most important thing is to wake up every day with a purpose and have life direction. As to home locations I did look into moving to locations more remote, I did find some amazing places that would allow me to build an ultimate layout but as been said already there may come a time where that location could work against me.

[AyJay]

Very true Andy. Each afternoon, I see beautiful properties with vast rooms, suitable candidates for railways. They stand in their own grounds and there is no danger that the next door neighbour will suddenly build an extra floor onto his horrible extension, casting our property into permanent shadow.

Then I have to ask, when there is 4ft of snow outside, will this idyllic property be isolated until the thaw and the answer is , 'Probably yes'.

 

Steve, I like your suggestion of making a list.  High on my list is keeping the place warm and the cost of heating.  I may suggest that we just move within the county, there are plenty of lovely places in Oxfordshire.

[BlackRat]

Everyone is different, so don’t worry about what others do, just think of yourself and your wife and work out what you both want.

 

If you have any dreams, desires or ambitions then now’s the time, you’ve worked for it, you’ve earned it so now go for what YOU want.

 

I’ve  dealt with far to many deaths where the partner left behind tells me of plans, dreams etc which now go unfulfilled.

 

As much as we don’t like to think it, the clocks ticking.

 

I never ever met one person on their death bed, ( more usually  the partner left behind) who said their biggest regret was that they could have worked for longer but didn’t.

 

I have also encountered bitter widows whose joy was unbridled as they ditched golf clubs, fishing rods, and model railway equipment with the words…… he spent all of his spare time on these, such a waste, we could have done so much.

 

Whatever you choose to do, enjoy it.

 

 

[TheQ]

2 hours ago, BlackRat said:

 

 

I have also encountered bitter widows whose joy was unbridled as they ditched golf clubs, fishing rods, and model railway equipment with the words…… he spent all of his spare time on these, such a waste, we could have done so much.

 

Whatever you choose to do, enjoy it.

 

 

And I bet dumping the stuff without realising the value of it...

[alastairq]

3 minutes ago, TheQ said:

And I bet dumping the stuff without realising the value of it...

 The trouble is, it takes a lot of effort to actually realise their value.

Especially at a time when many feel inclined to de-clutter their lives?

[Andy Hayter]

3 hours ago, AyJay said:

 

Then I have to ask, when there is 4ft of snow outside, will this idyllic property be isolated until the thaw and the answer is , 'Probably yes'.

 

 

But that does not have to be a problem if you are aware of the likelihood and plan for it.

 

We live in a small village (pop under 300) 3000ft above sea level.  We expect to get snow and we expect the village to be cut off - worst case so far in 18 years was 8 days - and not because the road was blocked*, but because the snow clearing vehicles came through the village and took the snow off the road and buried the cars parked beside it.   I could have dug the car out but I had no urgent need and did not bother.

 

* The road was cleared early on day 3.

 

But we knew that winters could be hard and have always planned for it.  This time of year we stock up and shopping is on a semi-industrial scale.  I reckon that we could withstand being shut off for over 3 weeks.  The only issue might be if there was a medical emergency but here at least we are well served and the local emergency services are equipped to handle just such issues.