monkeysarefun

My partner has a rabbit, she'll love to watch this... In a variation on the theme, there is Black Sheep, an attempt to fleece the zombie sheep fans.

This movie is the perfect date film - zombies and hotties for the lads, Jane Austin for the gentler sex: Pride And Prejudice And Zombies

I know I should be spending every spare minute I have extending my model building experience , but sometimes I come home and the choice will be between cutting out several hundred slates and gluing them to a bit of cardboard roofing, OR logging into World Of Tanks and working up to getting the DERP gun on my Hetzer, I know its kind of stretching the boundaries of what this forum is about, but maybe if we start with games with trains in them we can prevent waves, and just go from there.

As an overpaid home grown government IT consultant I'll just divert you with this picture of King parrots in my back yard ...... ...... ....... ....... ...... whilst I sneak away!

Hey, we live in a magical place. Down here you can leave Liverpool and drive to Camden in 30 minutes. Perth takes 3 days but,

This little memory was prior to the Waterfall train crash, which was tragic, and unfortunately occurred in a particularly rugged section of the line, being a sandstone cutting with difficult access which made getting equipment and rescuers to the site very difficult despite being about 20km from the Sydney CBD. Similar to the Glenbrook train crash of 4 years or so before that one - again in difficult sandstone country. At the time I worked at the Glenbrook RAAF base and the RAAF played a big part in logistically supporting the recovery operation there, In fact we had our Christmas party organised for that day but the food, BBQ's and RAAFie cooks were diverted to the accident site to feed the emergency services. I've not had to catch a Sydney train for quite some time so when googling for a generic picture of the destination boards I chose the first one. I know Waterfall isn't on the route to Blackwood because Blackwood isn't even a place - its BlackTOWN. I just found a random pic to illustrate what the boards here look like. But anyway, I was surprised to see the countdown clock thing, thats new, I guess its meant to stop people hurtling down the escalators and bouncing off the closing doors. And as to punctuality, the NSW liberal government fixed that magically by just changing the definition of a train being 'late' from 3 minutes later than the timetabled time to 6 minutes or something. NO need for expensive overseas contractors any more -Job done!

But even worse than that was when one of your programmes got popular down here, and so once it started to flag there, the producers thought that they could milk it a bit more if they made an orstryalian version. First you send us your convicts, and then you send us "Are You Being Served Down Under..." https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aGiEH5UpZm8 I know its not a movie but it should have been because it would have been shorter than a TV series . In horse racing terms that the Queen would understand if she reads this - It was just crying out for the stewards to put the screens up around it and let the vet put it out of its misery with a shotty.* *Shotty - Australian for shotgun. AND you know what that means when you are in a thread that brings up Australia AND shotguns at the same time - the greatest use of film stock ever - a little bit more of Mad Max one !

My main issue with Blair Witch was wondering where they got those amazing camcorder batteries that lasted the whole weekend. My camcorder at the time would die in under 40 minutes., which would have made my Blair Witch movie ending with me working out where to park the car and then going back to double check that I hadn't left my lights on.

Way down here our platforms have blue screens that announce train departures, like this: I remember one afternoon being on Town Hall station when the screens all crashed, and just showed the infamous windows blue screen of death, (file image!): Two little old ladies were beside me intently studying the screen covered in this microsoft gobbledygook , and one turns to the other and asks "Does it stop at Waterfall?"

Here's one for consideration. I actually really like it but whenever I talk other people into watching it afterwards they always say "Thats the Worlds Worst Movie!" An early movie from Peter Jackson of Lord Of The Rings and Hobbit fame, and also owner of Wingnut Wings, a model kit company that makes the best ever plastic kits of WW1 aircraft. As a keen WW1 aircraft modeller himself, he wasn't able to find a decent kit of the planes he wanted to build and so when he got rich (despite this movie!) he created a company to make them for him. How cool that is. Anyway, this one goes out to Allan! https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G4HvQtZWR2A

"When the Wind Blows" was like that - my sister put it on for my son when he was about 8 because it was a cartoon. I don't think he's smiled since and that was 14 years ago..

I waited for you early adopters to confirm if it worked before I commited..

Hmmm, I just took the focus ring off of the original lens, am I the only one who did that...?

That made me remember "Santa Claus Conquers The Martians" Here's the trailer, it only goes for 1:26, go on - do yourselves a favour! https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HnEJrwYXXsI

You can annoy her again with this one then, at 5:12. German troops being shipped off to the Russian front with the help of the traitorous GWR: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SiZnPyNF2fs Other than that, this isn't a WORLDS WORST movie.

And, on the subject of British horror, I'm surprised that none of Hammer's offerings seem to have had a mention yet. Mind you, As I recall, although Hammer's were often quite silly, not too many were completely devoid of redeeming features. They did venture into sci-fi with Night of The Big Heat, which was a bit iffy (well, I thought they did, although Wiki seems to reckon it was by Planet Film Productions). Especially laughable was the idea that the aliens were capable of completely incinerating a human with the energy drawn from a single car battery. Given that my experience of the average big, rubber car battery was that it barely held sufficient energy to start a car,I found this idea hugely amusing . I think Sci Fi movies generally are the worst since if the writers hit a plot hole they can just invent "Gravity waves" or "molecular regenerators" or so on to get the heroes out of trouble. Its lazy writing. Was it Independence Day that had Jeff Goldblum get into the Alien space ship and connect his laptop or whatever to their control system and save the world? (I forget the exact details so apologies to Independence Day fans!) How would that happen in real life? I have enough trouble finding the right lead to connect my phone to my car.

I know the name of this movie! "The current Australian Liberal Party"

Totally agree, with the soundtrack and Oddballs character to me it seems to be a Vietnam War movie set in World War 2, such a contrast to all the straight laced traditional WW2 movies prior to it.

I could look at your brickwork all day!

Russian WW2 movies seem to be the most accurate when it comes to hardware, maybe they still have lots of them lying around or something. I can't thing of a ' worst' Russian movie to help the thread along, but the most enjoyable one would be White Tiger: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qiGDJ5-dXaI Which has Panzer 111's, T34's and even lend lease Matildas and Lees.

We sure did have a lot of car movies back in the '70's. The cars that Ate Paris, Midnight Spares, Running On Empty, Metal Skin, and then the Mad Max stuff. I guess that reflected our car culture here back then, especially pre 1974 before the oil crisis killed it, along with the media beat ups about our death trap V8 suicide cars that were killing our kids Looking back though, it was a bit mental. For instance I remember the little old lady next door to me when I was back in primary school. ( well at the time she seemed to 11 year old me to be a little old lady but she was probably actually about 35) Her husband had died and she had to learn to drive his car. It was a bright yellow XA Falcon GT coupe, which had a 5,8litre V8 in it. One of these - But back then that didn't even seem strange that a litle old lady would have that kind of car. In fact I wanted her to adopt me because my dad was English and so our family car was a Wolsely 24/80 which he thought made us posh. It's big selling point was the Wolsely badge on the grill that lit up at night, but to me it was still an embarrassment and source of shame. I've gone a bit off topic, so to bring it back to bad movies you did mention at the end of your post a zombie movie that you can't find. That reminds me of another bad Australian movie from 1977 that is also not findable, other than in fragments on youtube etc Called 'Cosy Cool" apparently everyone who had anything to do with it was permanently stoned and just made it up each day as they went along. Here is a small snippet. interesting mainly because of all those great old 70's cars and bad old 70's facial hair.... https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=k6OkaOMI_f4

A young couple were making passionate love in the blokes panel van (you know, shagpile carpets, big double mattress in the back ... all that stuff that was huge in Australian '70's panel vans...) when suddenly the girl, being a bit on the kinky side, yells out "Oh please, whip me, whip me!" The bloke, not wanting to pass up this unique opportunity, but not having any whips to hand, in a flash of inspiration, opens the window, snaps the aerial off the van and proceeds to whip the girl until they both collapse in sadomasochistic ecstasy. About a week later, the girl notices that the marks left by the whipping session are still raw red welts so she goes to the doctor. The doctor takes one look at the wounds and asks, "Did you get these marks having sex?" The girl is a little embarrassed but admits that, yes, she did. Nodding his head knowingly the doctor exclaims, "I thought so, because in all my years of doctoring...........You've got the worst case of VAN AERIAL DISEASE that I've ever seen."

Thanks Allan. I just really really like Mad Max! Your railway modeller articles had the same affect on me!

Mad Max one was a dire film??? Hand back your Australian citizenship, your Aussie flag esky and your thongs* and report to Nauru ready for deportation at once, sir! I recall being at the drive in in 1980 or 81 or whatever, when the ad for it came on and after it finished the whole place just erupted into flashing high beams and blasting air horns. The mostly male audience (because we were too lame to get chicks so went to the drive in with our mates) just went into one big ecstatic eruption. As a historian which I'm not, I reckon that the last time anything remotely like that had happened was when Michelangelo released the preview shots of his Cistene chapel. What makes it even more poignant and therefore a classic movie is that back in 1980 or 81 or whenever it was that I saw the ad, most of the cars AT the drive in could have been extras in the movie. Back then if you didn't have a V8 you were a little bit suss. I had a straight 6, but it was a Torana GTR so I got way with it. The first five minutes of Mad Max 1 has to be the greatest 5 minutes of movie ever filmed bar none not even the moon landing or the bit where the marines raise the flag on Iwo Jima or something comes close.. The yanks reckon they can do cars and guns and cops but we are the quiet achievers. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sOi1l_Dkl-A Here are 2 interesting Mad Max Facts or as I call them Mad Fax: Mad Fax 1: The bloke in the Monaro - the 'Nightrider" - couldn't drive a car. Did George Miller say "sorry mate, you can't drive a car and every scene you are in has you driving a car like a bit of a mental, we;ll have to find someone else"? No. instead they get a stuntman to lie down between the front seats and work the wheel and do the peddle stuff all at insane speeds without being able to see where he was going Mad Fax 2: To do the final destructive bit in the clip above, they attached a rocket to the car. Here is an amusing account of how they all nearly got killed: https://www.theguardian.com/film/2017/jun/01/we-considered-ourselves-dead-the-explosive-tale-of-mad-maxs-rocket-car Now for my 2 cents worth, my worst movie vote goes to The whole movie is available on youtube https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ccYMVM74gAI&t=755s but the trailer is enough to get a sense. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=c1wBOF1aeOI Just on the remote chance you can't bear to watch even that tiny excerpt of brilliance, then the basic plot is that 8 girls at various times for no apparent reason other than the director asked them too, strip down to their underwear and bikinis But for some other even weirder reason the director thought it would all be a much better and more serious highbrow film if he included the worlds worst giant spider (and I live in Australia so I know about giant spiders and this one is crap.and is missing 6 eyes!) If you want my worst Australian movie, I'd go 1983's Turkey Shoot, starring Michael Craig and that gay guy who's name I can never remember but always played villains, usually stroking a cat. Again, here is the trailer which was intended to be watched at the drive in in the freezing cold with the windows all fogged up, and a cold blast coming in through the crack at the top of the drivers window where the speaker was hooked over, with Evalyn Ramsey in the passengers seat who you hoped wouldn't notice your wandering hands but always did so that is why the next week you were back at the drive in with your mates... https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ojai1EcJcV8 Another fact, not a Max Fax but a fact - the final climactic scene is the most activity our RAAF had had since Vietnam. * used here 'thong's are footwear, for you in the UK, see 'flipflops'. It does not refer to underwear that goes up your bum.

I'm not sure what this bird is but it lands on me every time I sit outside and expects me to go get bread or whatever for it Cockies! Very noisy when they land on the plastic roof of my deck, even noisier when they do the screeching thing. These aren't that close, about 100m away in the paddock behind.