Giz Puk

try getting her to play Monopoly. 'Oh dear I seem to have mislaid the pieces.... do you mind using this train for you and i'll have the iron?' If she likes the train..... you win, and if she thinks you're the man for her because you didn't assume the iron was for her.... you win again!!!!! Yours Aye, giz

When the wet weather sets in I bet Duncans' walk home can be quite 'Slow and Dirty'..... and with his jacket draped over his shoulder like that it looks like he's got a 'Withered Arm'. Yours Aye, Giz

I once met Duncan Bisskits and his wife'She's really quite 'NICE' you know. (much nicer than that Italian guards wife.... Mrs Garibaldi). Yours Aye, Giz

With so many people holding the HST in such high regard, how about seeking to keep just one complete set to sit alongside the prototype and the APT-E? With some many favourite liveries to choose from I believe that there can only be one livery that would meet everyones' approval, and this weekend is the ideal time to recognise that. Yes you guessed it... none other than 'Harry Patch' and with next year being the 100th anniversary of 'The Great War' and 'The War to end all Wars', I think that it would be fitting to use this to tour the British Isles at the start of next years poppy Campaign and for many years to come. What better to way to introduce future generations to the sacrifices made by their forefathers, their local history and the part railways played and continue to play today. Either way, my 'Harry Patch' was at the head of 'The Poppy Express' on my layout today..... departing at 11:02 as it did on Saturday...... and will do for years to come. Thank You 'Harry' and all those of your generation who fought and died for our freedom....... 'We will remember you'. Yours Aye, Giz

I told my wife that I was entering a 'Cake Box challenge' She immediately started laughing and said.... ' don't bother......... I've seen your cooking attempts before!!' Yours aye, giz

I've just seen my wifes' entry to the cake box challenge. When I asked what it was she said 'three used tea bags hanging off a bit of chord' I asked 'why aren't there any trains?' and she replied ...... ' cos theres leaves on the line silly!!!!!!'

I think we all agree that ground breaking concepts such as the HST is worthy of preservation in some form, but what about those more abundant yet almost insignificant items that we take for granted every day, items such as signals, line -side boxes etc as after all these are the red phone boxes and ticket machines of our childhood ? I wonder if in fifty years time people might say 'oh I wish they'd preserved one of those .....' when talking about a vending machine or even a modern station sign. I think I might even fancy one of those ticket machines at Bristol Templemeads that you have to go through to enter/exit the platform, it would be an ideal talking point for entry to the railway room...... and perhaps i could control who comes in as well....bonus!!

Now I'm not suggesting my missus ain't a looker............. but this week 'Frankie' went for a job in Hollywood after mistaking it for the one in the local gazette (Hollywood Bowl it should have been!!). Anyways no sooner had she got there for the interview and got comfortable on the casting couch with the old Weinstien........ than he starts claiming that she touched him and he wants damages!!!! Pity the ticket wasn't one-way as she'll be coming back now to try for a job with that Paul Hollywood...... I bet he don't like her cooking neither....So she'll get voted off straight away. Yours Aye, Giz

Just noticed that on the front page it says we have over 35,500 members on this forum site. Brilliant!!! If we all donate ten bob... (that's 50p for all you TOPs blue diesels..... and roughly half a guinea for all you pre-nationalisation lot.... and two turnips and a mangle wurzle for those of us down 'ere in the West Country), we could afford to buy them ourselves and donate them to be displayed in the BRM. (Sorry Andy Y .... my mistake.... I meant to put NRM but the B and the N are next to each other on the keyboard). Those of you who do the modern stuff can get a loan from 'The Bank of Mum and Dad'......... and yes we will accept Euro's (for another 2 yrs anyway). Perhaps as its part of our heritage..... the 'English Heritage' ( bit secular that title don't you think) could make a donation too, after all we are all British regardless of still having strong allegencies to 'the big 4' and 'privateers' aaaargh! my hearty. Failing that I could ask 'The Wicked Witch of The West Country' to curse em with 'The Black Spot' for eternal damnation and misery............. She did it to me when she uttered those heinous words......' I DO'. Yours Aye, Giz

I can only hope that these stay in the public domain such as the NRM or alike for all to enjoy. Failing that please, please, please....if they have to go into a private collection.... may it be that of Pete Waterman or another worthy champion of our railway heritage. Heaven forbid though that they should get snapped up by 'someone wiv money' whose only reason for buying them is 'cos they might be worf summat and cos they match my interior designers feng shui like'. If there really is a father crimbo... maybe...just maybe.... a deal can be done between the seller and the NRM so that they don't have to go to auction. (I'd love to buy them but I'm still waiting to win the euro millions to have enough to buy that sandwich from the APT to donate to the NRM) Wouldn't it be ironic though if someone could secure EU funding from johnny foreigner to save them before we leave.. after all they owe us for saving them in '45. Sorry Brussels me old sprout, but Messrs Mulder and Skulley keep saying 'The truth is out there'. I'd even be nice to Donald Trump if he bought them for us....... well initially anyway. Yours Aye, Giz. By the way this is 'Fake News ' right?

My missus always says that when she wants my opinion..... she'll tell me what it is !!!!! Seeing as she's busy at the moment it looks like I've got free reign for a minute so............. break it to her slowly and wait for the right time...... she'll tell you when that is!!!!! Seriously though, I took her and her folks to 'The Great Gathering' at York using my sneaky mr fox skills to work on the parents first..... mum and dad loved it, she loved it because obviously mum and dad approved, especially as I drove, we walked around York, had some lunch which I paid for again (just fish and chips nothing fancy) then I drove home. Everyone had a 'Grand Day Out-Grommit' and she discovered that she loves A4's...... but only if they are blue. RESULT-Yeah baby!!! motto: if you can, let her friends, or better still her parents and family, provide the excuse for bringing it up as then it won't be your idea. If she still doesn't like it after all that..... cut your losses and run or get a boyfriend instead ( as long as he likes trains that is). Spookily enough whilst waiting in the cue for literally hours, just before we got to the door a man six feet in front of us turned round to look back at the queue and nearly fell over when I called out 'Hello Shippers'. It was an old close friend that I had not seen or heard of for over 20 yrs!!!!!!!! So if you are reading this Mr Mark Wilson from Guz (Plymouth to you non wurzels) we'd love to hear from you and no we didn't realise that you liked trains either. Yours Aye, Giz

Blimey Kevin, you better get on Cash in the attic Directly. I wonder what its worth...... that is as its obviously the steam era we must be talking 'Old Monet' Yours Aye, giz

AS James May would say.....'Thats my kind of train set' Thanks for sharing..... i'm now off to Cogload Junction to get my weekly fix from 'The Ministry Of Sound' also known as the West Coast line. Anyone who likes the Beach Boys knows the best sounds come from the West Coast .... Although I know the East Coast Massive will beg to differ. Yours Aye, Giz

My foreign pen-pal mate Denzil he do live abroad down in Kernow. I know tis abroad cos you do have to cross over that there bit of water called the Tamar. It's like the English channel but not as wide and it do still have a ferry to get across just like them gurt big P+O ones I done see at Dover on his TV. It's real true you know cos it's in colour n'all... tis so. Anyways he's dead posh cos he married his cousin.... an she wern't even pregnant.....now that is posh innum. He did say that them there filo pastry scientists or filosiphers wot do think a lot, now know that a snails shell is aerodynamic............... if it wasn't they'd be sluggish. Yours Aye, Giz

my mate Denzil Pendragon says the only bit of the sun he thought was hot was that there Linda Lusardi on page 3 cos she's proper hot and if she wanted him to land on her at night he be straight round there.............DIRECTLY!!!!!! (note: for those not familiar with west country terminology.... it means shes scrum diddly in Somerset and Well Sic for all you cosmopolitans up there in LA LA Land. Personally I'd rather be down 'ere in BAA BAA Land aaargh innum, aint that right Taffy boy. Proper Job. Yours Aye, Giz

Thank you, and..... Bagpuss, oh Bagpuss, Old fat furry catpuss, Wake up... and see this thing that I bring........ It's made in a cake box..... which fits in a tin. I know you like railways, often people say, the bestest of all............ is Gods' Wonderful Railway. Yours Aye, Giz

Lovely photos Kevin, the black and white images seem to slow the whole pace of the scene down totally as if the culmination of a long working day with the light starting to fail..... or is he returning from the night shift having just seen the arrival of the early milk train and hoping to get home for a cup of tea and full English before the sun gets up? Wish the image was DCC sound as we could press f--- and listen to that sizzling bacon.... mmm starting to feel hungry myself. any chance of a few images in Sepia for all us 'Bagpuss lovers'............(Big Yawn).... I've just come over all sleepy. Yours Aye, Giz

I can see why this isn't on the Bargains thread................... THIS IS A GIFT !!!!! Thank you Andy Y and others and I hope that the 'Santa Express' leaves you all a nice little gift in your Christmas stocking this year..... You certainly have been good. Yours Aye, Giz

For anyone wishing for views of the new 800's on the Dawlish riviera please see the link attached for the Kernow society..... I know some might think it should be under 'foreign railways' but unlike Catalonia I don't think the mayor of Truro (bright lights-big city) has declared independence yet. I love this site nearly as much as this one in that it is both friendly and informative, updated constantly...... and a great source of material for anyone modelling the South West. Some great ideas and inspiration for the cake box challenge can be found here too. So everyone..... Lets bake, eat cake (CK take note) or better still just enjoy. or if you prefer... Keep dancing, modelling, enjoying. Hope you all agree that the new challenge is a ...good game, good game and looking at that thread.... didn't they do well !! here's looking forward to the next brucie bonus Yours Aye, Giz http://www.cornwallrailwaysociety.org.uk/

T Talking of the Irish, get onto you tube and watch the Spike Milligan sketch about the Irish astronauts..... I know its from a different era when things didn't have to be PC.... but my colostomy bay split half way through I was laughing so much.... The only consolation was when the wife said 'That's it you're in the S*** now', I started laughing again and had a little dribble too!!!! NO... down my chin

Totally agree with everything you mentioned here with reference to both the functions provided and how we drive our locomotives. I can't help thinking that we are so lucky to have both manufacturers and specialist sound providers alike who are willing to provide everyone with a sound option that is suitable for both their needs and their budget. Wouldn't it be nice if that at every exhibition someone had the time, inclination and patience to enable people both young and old, to 'have a go' at driving a locomotive 'properly'. I appreciate that many exhibitors may already do this at various events and this would not be feasible at large events as this may clog up the system and prevent the majority of people being able to get up close to layouts due to the crowd waiting to take their turn. What better way of encouraging those we see at events who are too timid to approach exhibitors for fear of being looked down upon, than to get them to feel part of our community and to educate at the same time. I also think it would be good if one day manufacturers supplied all locomotives (and rolling stock where applicable) with the facility and space to easily and quickly fit speakers, chips and lights similar to a plug and play format. I know some will say that certain suppliers and manufacturers already do this, but some of these systems are currently beyond the acceptable price range that modellers on a budget are able to afford and if we wish that sound is to become a highly desired and achievable function then it needs to be simple to fit, operate and update as the quality improves. All my locomotives currently have non-operating lights, but should I ever be able to go over to DCC than I can think of nothing better than can add to the realism of a layout than the use of lights and sound........ other than realistic smells of course but that's another subject in itself. I just know that a new thread will spring up now concerning the lighting of layouts and do exhibitors have theirs on too bright, and when is an exhibition hall too dark.......... bring on the lighting police. Other than the excellent and intuitive..... though deemed controversial to many, layout depicting 'The Great Train Robbery' ,do any other layouts get exhibited as winter/night time rosters? Yours Aye, Giz

Wasn't it fortunate that the Halloween Ball in the House of Commons was two weeks ago and not this weekend. Had it been, the PM would have needed to get skeleton costumes for herself and her front bench..... because if any more resign she'll have no-body to go with. BOOM BOOM!!!!!!!! Yours Aye, giz (Who let that bloody fox back in????)

just found a ticket from the Nene Valley Railway. No 0350 Second Return (Child) from Wansford to Ferry Meadows. Don't know the date but it must be before Feb 75 as I remember going on the bus with my grandad and he snuffed it then....as one would say. Yours aye, Giz

my eldest lad just bought a property 8 doors down from me, built sometime in the 30's When we took the alcove boarding out in his front room, the funny looking girder that supports the fireplace in the back bedroom..... when viewed upside down is part of the old SDJR track that ran through Bawdrip approx 150m from where it is now. Currently planning to paint it and leave it as a feature...... mind you if it ever goes missing he'll know it's in my man cave next to the raised vegetable beds built from old sleepers. Yours Aye, Giz

I had some pet Herrings once, or were they Kippers? No they must have been Herrings as my house is smoke free too Yours Aye, giz