Shamouti Ben Yafo Posted February 16, 2011 Share Posted February 16, 2011 Just as aside, I am beginning to agree with Shortliner's post a few pages back, about the "attention seeking" nature of the OP.... the writer of which has not condescended to post any further at all here, in acknowledgment or otherwise, in 4 pages-worth of thread... so what really is going on there?? I for one would be keeping a low profile, given some of the replies on here. Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pennine MC Posted February 16, 2011 Share Posted February 16, 2011 but in some cases it's clear that folk need the sort of help that we can't give. But that latter bit? Diagnostician, are we? I dont need to be. I can think of at least three members (past or present) who have by their own admission had some form of mental disorder or affliction*; balance of probabilities suggests that in 10,000 members there'll be a few more. Then on top of that, there's my own judgment, based on comparing my own reactions to certain situations. I believe it's called 'emotional intelligence'. * That's not intended as any sort of judgement, it's a case of 'there but for the grace of God go I', but the observation I made is surely in their own interests, is it not? (BTW before anybody says the OP isnt one of them, let's not forget I'm talking in a general sense) ... the OP.... the writer of which has not condescended to post any further at all here, in acknowledgment or otherwise, in 4 pages-worth of thread... so what really is going on there Last active this afternoon, Jordan. I for one would be keeping a low profile, given some of the replies on here. That's pretty much the way it goes, I'm afraid, we're all ultimately responsible for the consequences of what we post here. If you voice an opinion, you cant do it in the expectation that everybody will agree with you. Likewise if you over-react, you cant guarantee that people will pussyfoot around you and not tell you as much. I do say that from the position of someone who's done both. Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
RMweb Gold The Stationmaster Posted February 16, 2011 RMweb Gold Share Posted February 16, 2011 Oh and Retail Therapy truly can be therapy.....So if things are getting more expensive you cant get as much therapy But it could be more highly detailed therapy Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
darren01 Posted February 16, 2011 Author Share Posted February 16, 2011 Hi all First of all I would like to say thank you to you all for your replays, I am shocked and overwhelmed with number of you that has shown me support! I never know I would have this amount of replays to what I said, I have read all your post and have taken a few days to take it all in and write this replay, to why I had a 3 o’clock in the morning freak out. I want to give you a frank and honest reply to you all; This has been hard for me to write as I am not one to open up, but after reading you replays, I feel I must share with you why I posted this about me leaving model railways. The truth of the mater is my partner was taken very ill just before Christmas and had to have a number of operations to have cancerous growths removed, but thank god she is on the mend and is clear of cancer now. This has made me very down over the last few months and made me look at what is important in life. All through this one thing that has kept me seine and that has been doing my model railway, as it helped Me relaxed and to get away for a bit. But when I saw what was going on with the new price I felt that what I loved was being taken away; could I really justify the cost of my hobby; A man needs a hobby, and in way I did over react to the new prices, and what had been going on for the last few month in my life I felt was the last strew! . I am sorry my over reaction I really am to the new price, I just have to learn to be more thoughtful in what I buy in the future, we all will. So now I must pick myself up and now move on, and that is to continue and grow me knowledge and skills in building model railways. I can never give up on railways as it has been apart of my life for so many years, I bet not many people can say they went trains spotting at nine Elms when they where a year and a half old! (1967) Do I love Railways? Yes! I will never forget that child standing at the end of the platform, at Paddington during the rush hour collecting number. And Bunking sheds all over London and getting thrown out of a few, No it will always be apart of me . Will I give up on model railways, No, never, it has always been a part of me; When I started this hobbies I did not know very much about how you go around building one, but I was told about Rmweb and joined and with your help I built Torrington. I have always wanted to build a model railway ,but never had the money or the space to have one , then my life and job changed and I was in a able at last have a go at building one. I spent just over five years building Torrington, and it has been a labour of love, and has enjoyed every moment building it. Yes did get a bit of the Torrington blues when I finished it, but I will be starting my new layout and this will get me focused again? We all just have to accept the world has change along with our hobby that we will have to take a longer look at what we buy. I don’t like the price increase that has happened but I have to accept it and move on. Torrington would have never been built with out the help I got from you all on here, with my incessant questions. You are all true gentle man, and should be prude of what we do on here for the hobby. I tank you for your knowledge you have shared with me since I have been a member. And I will continue joining in, as I learn more I will in years to come pass on what I have learned from you to the next generation that comes to the our hobby . That what Rmweb is about! All the very best to you all Darren Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
RMweb Gold The Stationmaster Posted February 16, 2011 RMweb Gold Share Posted February 16, 2011 Darren, I'm glad to see I won't have to give you a shake if we make it to SWAG day at Taunton I'm very sorry to hear about your wife and can quite understand - fortunately without a directly similar experience - some of the pressure you have felt and how seeing those new recommended prices must have seemed like the last straw. I hope some of what we've said has helped and that we'll be seeing more of your scenic work in the future. All the best. Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pennine MC Posted February 16, 2011 Share Posted February 16, 2011 This has been hard for me to write as I am not one to open up, ... Darren, I sensed that and I do understand, but I hope you feel better now you've shared it. I hinted at an underlying reason, obviously I had no idea what that was. A lot of what I've said has been general, not aimed at you as such but please accept my sincere apologies if anything I've written has hurt you or your better half. I hope she goes on OK - and one thing I'd add is that I'm sure she wouldn't want you to give up on the hobby that you obviously have an aptitude for. All the best to you both. Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest jim s-w Posted February 16, 2011 Share Posted February 16, 2011 Hi Darren Lets all hope your partner's condition continues to improve. In some respects what you say is true, its only a hobby and as such you can take it an leave it but at the same time you are very right when you say that it can also be a break or a distraction from the real world. Glad you are sticking around. Jim Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
RMweb Gold PhilH Posted February 16, 2011 RMweb Gold Share Posted February 16, 2011 Well done Darren, hope your new layout gives you as much pleasure as Torrington has given us. Phil Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shamouti Ben Yafo Posted February 16, 2011 Share Posted February 16, 2011 I dont need to be. I can think of at least three members (past or present) who have by their own admission had some form of mental disorder or affliction*; balance of probabilities suggests that in 10,000 members there'll be a few more. Then on top of that, there's my own judgment, based on comparing my own reactions to certain situations. I believe it's called 'emotional intelligence'.[/size][/font] No, it's not. You have a point re: probability; but I've worked in mental health for more than 12 years now and I'm not qualified to make that call. Therefore I doubt that you are either. Who is to say your reactions are any yardstick? Twelve years on (with a good deal of study before that) and I am yet to find anyone who is at all qualified to state categorically what might be normal bold enough (or silly enough) to do so. In fact, the more experienced professionals are in this field, the less they trust any attempt at defining normality. And if you do suspect that someone is on the verge of some sort of event/collapse/breakdown or what you will - don't bray about it. Either offer support or stand down. Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest dilbert Posted February 16, 2011 Share Posted February 16, 2011 Take care of your wife Darren and the rest will follow... This thread has been strange in a way - there are a couple of posts that quite honestly I would not have thought that the authors would ever pen in the way that they did - disappointing ? Yes... dilbert Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
S.A.C Martin Posted February 16, 2011 Share Posted February 16, 2011 Take care of your wife Darren and the rest will follow... This thread has been strange in a way - there are a couple of posts that quite honestly I would not have thought that the authors would ever pen in the way that they did - disappointing ? Yes... dilbert It's funny how model trains can bring out the worst or best in us. But the variety of opinions on here are all valid, from different standpoints. Hope your missus recovers well Darren - and fair play to you for your honest, brave response. Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Max Stafford Posted February 16, 2011 Share Posted February 16, 2011 Takes a big man to stand up and talk openly about your situation in such a candid manner Darren, you deserve respect for that. I'm glad that your partner is on the mend and I wish you both well for the future. I'm also pleased that reading the responses has helped you get what you want from the hobby in better perspective. It has, in fact brought your work to my closer attention and in fact I'm very impressed with your creation, they're top drawer! I like your description of your experience as a '3am freakout'. Not the first time I've had one of those! I do find a good rant extremely therapeutic though! ;-) All the best. Dave. Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
trisonic Posted February 16, 2011 Share Posted February 16, 2011 I had a 3:00am Freakout this morning too (if it makes you feel any better). Mine was about a stupid 25 second advert for my Wife's company. I'm doing the music. Contrary to popular belief trying to fit three changes of mood in the advert into 25 seconds is really difficult! My Nephew (a Movie Director) is doing the filming and his Aunt made a comment that part of the ad sounded Egyptian.....which made me flip out at the time -------but internally. So this 4:00am I woke convinced that she had persuaded both my Nephew and my Wife to use another composer!!!!! Really stupid, I felt, when I came to my senses. That is what you get in the "Hour of the Wolf" I should have learnt my lesson years ago. Darren - With your skills I would scratchbuild Locos and flog them for lots of dosh! Best, Pete. Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pennine MC Posted February 17, 2011 Share Posted February 17, 2011 And if you do suspect that someone is on the verge of some sort of event/collapse/breakdown or what you will - don't bray about it. Either offer support or stand down. I did give support - just three posts above yours, which you've presumably either not seen or have ignored. You may think it a clumsy attempt - and that is your right - but I have good reason to believe it was appreciated in the spirit it was offered. Who is to say your reactions are any yardstick? Not you. You know nothing about me, my life experiences or how they've shaped me. ... I've worked in mental health for more than 12 years now and I'm not qualified to make that call. Therefore I doubt that you are either. Point taken and I do obviously respect your professional experience, but IMO that doesnt form the whole picture. But this is way OT and out of respect to Darren and the thread that he started, I don't intend to argue the toss any further. Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Theakerr Posted February 17, 2011 Share Posted February 17, 2011 Someone should write a book "Growing old for Dummies". I am not trying to be sarcastic. One of the things which continuously surprises me is that even though I have much less to worry about now, as opposed to when I was say 55, I find myself worried about the most stupid things. I now know it is common and after some research I was able to find confirming data. However up to that point it was really getting to me. Also, what does not help is that we men tend not to talk about such things so we find ourselves isolated when they do happen. Any way it is great to see this thread, I have found it rewarding. GOOD LUCK Darren Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
D802 FORMIDABLE Posted February 17, 2011 Share Posted February 17, 2011 Glad your are not leaving the hobby mate as you still have much teach to the rest of us because your work is allways insirational to those of us that are not quite blessed with your talents. I allways look for updates on Torrington to see what magic you have created. Allways remember that our hobbies are the one thing that allows us to unwind and price rises just mean it takes a little longer to save for. Very glad to hear that your better half/misses is on the mend and doing well mate Best wishes allways Anthony Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Archived
This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.