NIK

Perhaps they are suggesting future letters be in the shape of paper aeroplanes that will be launched from the hoppers as they pass through towns.

I think you put your foot in it.

Everybody else take five.

Satirist's answerphone message: "I can't come to the phone right now as I'm in an impossible and odious position."

"Earth to earth, ashes to ashes, calories to joules, in the sure and certain hope of the recycling being done with minimal use of non renewable fuels".

Hornby have had a 21 pin decoder in production for many many years but has been said it only has four function outputs. The Zimo MX638D with 6 functions @ £24 has a larger range of features and is cheaper even after the latest 20% price hike but may be in shorter supply at the moment. Regards Nick

I'm learning a new country song on my geeetar written by poor, humble, peace lovin little Willy Brown just before the feds stormed his mansion just for him keeping a tank or ten on his drive. The title is "Well I shot the dog and I shot your ma and now I'm gunnnin for you."

A great dairy farmer always gets a pat on the back. What do you call a champion farmer?: a good man in his field.

What do you call the state when the ends of your feet go to sleep?: Comatoes.

'Shome chicken, some neck and some poppadums' please'. Winston Churchill, Birmingham Conservative Club restaurant 1941.

If its a road for people after sheep then it should have a sign to the leisure centre.

Hi, Jokes only for this topic please or I will send in more of my own jokes only worse than before. I won't give examples of bad jokes - I will leave you to imagine the worst - maybe think the comic equivalent of a bad Disc Jockey's quips or the jokes at the end of Kernow Model Centres weekly customer E-mails. However, thinking of DJs - Graffiti in a Medical School Bar loo: A full bottle in front of me is better than a full frontal lobotomy. Regards

New definition: Tractable: claiming you were looking on your phone for agricultural equipment but found porn.

Hi, The ribbon cable connection looks very similar to that in a photo of an LGB sound decoder. The large black item appears to be a heat sink used to dissipate power. Regards Nick

Hi, Assuming you have Pro Cab plugged directly into the command station: If it is a PowerPro (with black box command station) then the following sequence may help: Power down system. Touch something that is grounded such as a nearby radiator. Unscrew lid of black box command station. Push down on daughter board that plugs into big circuit board underneath. Put lid back on. Power up and check Pro Cab display. Power down and screw lid back on. Regards

When I was young I used to draw a circle around a word on each page of a library book, now I'm older I just want to draw a line under it.

Hi, You may find the link to more info you need about the stay alive capacitor is hidden in the photo under the DCC decoder. Regards Nick

What do you call a Spanish driver whose who has had his motor stolen?: Carlos

Essex Council deny that they are filling in pot holes near Rod Stewart's house because he threatened to sing to them. 'You are failing, you are failing, road too bumpy, for my sports car .... and for me'.

Hi Mick, The problem might be because you have a Z21 controller feeding one power district and Z21 Dual booster feeding two more districts. This could be causing a phase difference between the Z21 and the two booster districts. Phase difference is a common cause of locos with diagonal pickups stopping at power district boundaries. A more standard DCC configuration for multiple boosters is to have the controller - the DCC command station feeding just boosters and not directly feeding a power district. You can check for phase difference being the cause by disconnecting the Z21 command station from its power district and powering that district from one of the boosters. If that particular loco no longer halts at any boundary that would be good evidence for phase difference having been the cause. If so have a good look in the command stations manufacturers info to see if there is a recommended way to use their boosters on a DCC layout. Regards Nick

President Putin walks into a bar. 'take down that bar and send it to Siberia'

I just sold a painting of sun flowers to an art dealer for a pound, you should have seen his van go.

What kind of quiche is really wrinkly?. Quiche Richards, man...............

Hi, Some filming for Doctor Who was done not too far from above location shown in the pictures in what the actress playing the Doctor's assistant at the time described as a quarry. Regards Nick

UK Police alert: The former cast of TV's The Bill have escaped into the community. They will become unpredictable if they hear the following words: Rehearsals, awards, re-takes, Baftas, career and repeat fees. The public are asked to look out for persons acting strangely or not acting at all.