LNERGE
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A week without an internet connection. BT says that is the quickest they can fix it. Stand by for me popping a gasket later if it's not working.
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I had major issues where they lied (the words of their own engineer) about the fault on our line - caused by one of their subbies cutting the cable whilst clearing trees. Eventually I phoned them and told them there were bare cables as a result of the line being cut and any deaths were down to them - an hour later they were there, the next day the cherry picker turned up and the fault was fixed.