Judge Dread

In the far gone days there used to be a product for clearing drains strangely called "Draino" which I believe was caustic soda. It came in a tin and was in crystal form. For my sins I used it to clear out the silencers on my Ariel Arrow. The procedure was to remove the silencers and pour half of the tin's contents into both from the entry ends. Then block that opening with a large potato firmly pressed in. Then invert one silencer and prop it up over an outside drain and at arms length quickly pour in as much boiling water as you could and as fast as you could. Then stand clear and I mean clear! The open of the silencer would erupt like a volcano and how! It was left until all was quiet and then hosed down. Carefully cutting off the potato and inserting hose pipe into the other end it was left to flush. Re boiling the kettle the process was repeated with the other silencer. Those in the know will be saying by now, but the baffles in those silencers where removable. Well I never could remove them, even when I bought a brand new pair of silencers , I still could not remove the baffles. Also there will be those who will be saying, "Ah, Ariel Arrows/Leaders, smoked worst than a WW1 destroyer!" They certainly did, I took mine to the Highlands of Scotland in 1963 and I don't think the twin trails of smoke have cleared yet!"

My wife's late aunt Sjaan was Dutch and she always said I didn't have to learn their language because so many of the Dutch spoke English. She also said, that one reason for that was the high number of throat cancer cases. I must admit that my own command of the Dutch language was limited to Please and Thank you. Whilst abroad it became obvious to us that an English person stood out by the way they dressed and the average local waited until we attempted to make our request in their native tongue however badly that might be. If you make the effort, usually you will be helped. I have witnessed colleagues attempt the slow and loud in English method to no avail and be ignored. Serve them right.

My 14 year old grand daughter has been doing Latin for some time now as an "extra" subject. Evidently it allows you to learn more easily most European languages. I am informed that only last evening my daughter, her mother, announced on Face Book, that she had been asked if they could take on a mother/daughter project, and was told,"OK,we will learn Dutch!". I, for one, await results with nervous anticipation!

We do our main shopping at a Bradford based superstore and the only item I had to refuse to drink was their cranberry juice because it was far too sweet. A special call had to be made to another local large supermarket as their own brand was much better. Now it seems those visits are over but I did notice that their petrol is well priced. No I won't be drinking it!

Trouble with the prostate has been a "worry" of mine for several years now and upon advice from my GP I have been having a daily glass of Cranberry juice. When I was discharged from hospital during the week, I received directions on what I should now avoid drinking and eating. There listed was Cranberry juice!

I think "jealous" would be a better term for such as these.

When my wife and I were tasked to take the grand daughter with us to Morrison's on shopping day, the only to keep her quite was to give her a small bunch of grapes to eat as we went around. The bag was held onto and presented with the rest of our shopping for payment at the tills. It is "Bribery and Corruption" but it kept her quiet. Now at the knowledgeable age of 14, if she condescends to go with us, we dump her near the magazine rack and she is to be seen, sat cross-legged on the floor, reading!

Too many years ago whilst I was working as an electrician, I was sent to a job at the Queen's Gardens Police station here in Hull. The job was quite straight forward, fit an extract fan into a toilet wall. The compilation came when I realised that it wasn't through an outside wall but through the room next door. That room was the armoury. The arrangement was that at all times a member of staff would watch over me whilst I was in the armoury. The shelves had various boxes on them looking very much ex army and in any case they were not in my way, so I ignored them. The item that caught my eye was a "Sten"gun complete with webbing strap. After a while I had a visit from an inspector to as how long I was going to be. I took the chance to mention the Sten gun and was told it had been handed in during a recent amnesty. "Is it loaded?" I asked and "Why is it stored with it's magazine clip?" A member of the armed police squad was sent for and on removing the clip it was found to be full. They were separated in the armoury immediately. My old dad told me that the place to look for ex German light weapons was off the quayside at Dover, as when returning soldiers saw the sign to the effect that all souvenirs would be confiscated, they threw them overboard there.

I have a Citroen Berlingo which I bought to transport my layout. Shortly after the purchase, "the powers that be" decided I could take some household rubbish down to the Corporation tip and there I was stopped because I was driving a "van". When they saw what I was actually carrying, it was decided that I could go ahead and tip but my details would be forwarded to the Guildhall here in Hull. I was then issued with 12 passes which would allow me access to the tip at the rate of no more than once per month. After ten years I still have three passes left.

Greetings all, I can now report that reports of my demise have been exaggerated. Thanks to the staff on ward 27 at the Castle Hill hospital near Hull having worked their wonders. Although it must be said that I did my very best to thwart them. Well I had the operation to fit a new valve, on Monday morning last week, and when I was returned to the recovery ward all seemed well. The next day, I was unplumbed and was actually able to reach the toilets, although the nurses told me off for trying to move alone. On Tuesday I started to experience moving wallpaper and was told it was due the post-op pain killer, Tramadol. Later that night as the ward settled down for the night, leastways the patients, I noticed that the staff seemed to be sat about talking loudly and when a fellow patient complained, the remark was made, “There’s number one”. I realised that I could not reach my case with my “dolly bag” in it to insert my ear plugs and after a while I had had enough on the general noise levels. I got out of bed, unplugged my link to the overhead display and started pulling on my trousers over my pyjamas. Case in hand, I set off for the door with one of the smallest nurses in pursuit. A couple of porters appeared to cut off my progress to the fire exit and I had to divert to another one. En-route I had an idea, set off the fire alarm! This cleared my path out of the door along the side of the building with an increase in numbers of porters unfortunately. As we walked, I text-ed my wife to come and get me. You may think these are rambling of a mad man and you would be half right. The further I got, the more I questioned my reasons for what I was doing. The fresh air must have been working on me and I finally stopped to answer the basic reason for doing what I was doing. I was invited to get into an ambulance which had arrived, and I did so. It took me around the building to front door and at that moment, my wife arrived. Everyone was so kind and understanding. The registrar asked if he organised a side single bed room, would I go into it. He arranged also a sleeping tablet, which didn’t really work and bedding so as my wife could watch over me until I fell asleep. The next day was a little better but there was a different pattern on the wall. My own surgeon arrived, along with Matron, to find out exactly what had taken place. I was prescribed a better sleeping tablet which was said to be so good as to require me to visit the toilet etc and be ready for bed before I took it! That one worked just fine. It was also pointed out to me that heart operation’ set free toxins into one’s system and these can cause hallucinations. Every one has been so wonderful and I have done my share of grovelling but every one has told me such behaviour is taken as to be normal, it’s down to the strength of the pain killer. I now have to visit a “Warfarin” clinic to thin my blood so as the metal valve will work successfully. Every day at first and then monthly, finally three monthly. Now for the exercise walks, up to the first lamp-post in the street and back, then to the second and so on and so on. Unfortunately there are no steps in our area, from the top of which I can shout “Yoh Adrian!!” Tramadol http://www.patient.co.uk/medicine/tramadol-for-pain-relief Warfarin http://www.nhs.uk/conditions/anticoagulants-warfarin-/Pages/Introduction.aspx I have posted this account of my experiences for anyone’s information and not to make any comment whatsoever of the running of the N.H.S. So please don’t bother to try and make any derogatory comments about that fine organisation. Thank you.

My 1961 Morris Minor caused me a great deal of embarrassment because of its starting handle. Falling out from the firm's annual dance, more the worse for drink I will admit, it was realised the car's battery was flat when the starter knob was pulled. By the way, I wasn't driving, I never was that daft but when I tried to get the handle inserted it just wouldn't go in. As the weather at the time was very cold, a standard modification was in use, that of a sheet of cardboard inserted behind the grill and in front of the radiator. This piece of cardboard had slipped right down and was blocking the opening under the radiator where the handle had to go. It took me several attempts to get my fingers through the grill, lift up the card and insert the handle. All this to the ribald comments of my colleagues passing by. The most polite one was something along the lines of, "Oh look, a clockwork car!" To be fair, once the handle was in place, the car started second try. Just in case any one reading any of these postings on starting handles and their use who may have the opportunity to have a try at this more forgotten art, I would say to them,"You must grip the handle with all digits, thumb and fingers, on the same side of the handle". If you have the misfortune to have the vehicle "backfire", you will not get a broken wrist for your troubles!

In where Barry?

Something tells me that the "P" reference to Barton and Holland, will be Barton on Humber and New Holland (Town or Pier). Town??, the last time I looked there were about six houses in New Holland Town, mind you it was in 1970!

They certainly did build Vincent's in Stevenage. Oh how I wish I could afford one again. It would be no good as I would be frightened to let it out of my sight. Have a look at " britainfromabove EPW013408" as to where they were born. Doofa-doofa-doofa-doofa indeed but only 3,500 of them at 100 m.p.h and only on 77 octane petrol @ 6.45 compression ratio at that!

"Never volunteer for anything", I thought the navy had taught you that!

The very latest update and I post this without wishing to make any comments on the state of the N.H.S. mainly because my wife is a retired S.E.N. My date for my operation, Feb 12th was put back to March 2nd but on the very morning I received that news I had a phone call to tell me that a new date was being offered, that of Feb 16th. I have also being informed that a young lady who was born shortly after moving in next door, too many years ago is now the Matron at the hospital I shall be going into next Sunday afternoon. She has promised to look after "Uncle John". Her mother and my wife have been friends for the last 42 years. I'm boned!

Not so complex but more "Brio". Taken outside the depot in Ostend on the Coast Tramway.

I used to work in the same factory as my brother and the only time I saw him was when he wanted something!

There's posh, mine came from the "Army & Navy" stores!

On the subject of never started, or unfinished or just a heap of **** kits. I have no qualms of buying such examples in the high hopes that I may one day make something of them but I will not pay a king's (or queen's) ransom for the privilege! I have, in the past, spent a considerable time removing moulding seems from kits and when I had to chance to complain to the manufacturer, I was told "We would have done that but then we would have had to charge you for that!" Looking back, fair comment I suppose. As a school lad, I was advised to build kits in three's. First number one until you became frustrated with it and it was put to one side for more thought. These were the days before the internet by the way. Kit two would be worked on until the same situation arose. Then onto kit three and hopefully when that one was pushed aside, you had a solution to the problem with kit number one. If the problems were not solved then you took them to your club's exhibition and sold them on the second hand stall and this is where I came in!

My reaction to this is to say "I wouldn't know weather I was coming or going" but on second thoughts, I don't think I'll bother!

I confess, I modelled the "bus on the bridge" and I would like one other offence taken into consideration.(There's another one on the other bridge). The crime took place on "Brockley Green SE4". I don't think some people take into consideration the expense of such an undertaking. The example in view, a Routemaster of course, was given free gratis but I don't just plonk any vehicle on the layout. This one was opened up and had some 20 passengers and a crew added at about a £1 each. The blinds were changed to include one that had "Brockley" on it and although Modelmaster came up trumps the only one I could find was 36B. A couple of years down the road and at an exhibition (no names, no pack drill) a very loud mouthed individual announced to all and sundry, "Ah, 36B service, that's Saturdays only!". My reply was easy, "And to-day is?". I resolved that if that question was to be asked on a Sunday, I would reply, "It's always Saturday on this layout". To keep in the mode of this line of enquiry, I would firstly direct your attention to the "badly drawn sunflower" in the bottom right hand corner. When the children notice it, the duty layout operator reaches underneath the layout where there is a handle. Pulling it down makes the "sunflower" raise up about 20 scale feet or so. Secondly, in the central first floor window of the printer's, on the left of the "RM" can be see a couple. I'll say no more on that subject.

I'm not late on parade, I was up at 8ish but my tasks have taken a while to complete. I had to have a little go at the snow but only a little one. The news here is that my operation has been cancelled! The operating theatre will not be available on the date required. It's no use me complaining, as if I would.I have to be positive, it now means that I can get on with the layout, all thou under strict supervision. Let's be careful out there. Many thanks again for all the "Friendly/Supportive" postings.

All this talk of frozen windscreens, if you had a Morris Minor, you would have discovered that their windscreens froze up on the inside as well. It is very important to clear windscreens by any method possible but not by pouring hot water on them! A few years ago a very good friend of mine was knocked down and killed on Boxing Day by a driver who had just cleaned a small hole in the screen. Whilst I'm in rant mode, clear all screens all the way around. If you had got the weather forecast in good time, you could have got up that little bit earlier and had plenty of time to do that. It upsets me to see drivers get into a snow covered car and clear the screen by putting the wipers on only. Finest thing for that job is a soft sweeping brush. Rant over!

My previous layout "Brockley Green SE4" had platforms that disappeared under a bridge. Incidently there is a bus on that bridge and the bridge at the other end of the scenic section had one on too!