Winslow Boy

I do it for you, me old mokur just so long as you pay me travelling expenses to get to Hipposhire. Anyone know o the price of a return from the lowlands of the Northwest to the Mud fields of Hipposhire. oh forgot to say sh.t shovelling is an add on extra so not included in above quote.

Much better. Just how I remembered them back in the good old days.

Those alderman weren't the only clever 'so-and-so's' you know. Why do think the west end is the good bit and the East end is ....... You get the drift-no pun intended.

Why do you think they go so fast! And as any poor putupon sh.t shoveller will testify, sh.t always flows down hill.

Is that what causes the D-NILE of service then.

Been there and got the t-shirt. It was usually the elderly dog owners that were the worst as they could see no reason why they should change the habit of a life time.

By gum that's a bit dear. Saw them in Morrisons yesterday for less than a fiver for a similar size. Hope its a few bags. Or is it something special ie. Canna compost. I will say it's a good idea to only buy fresh as it does go off.

Having spent my professional career- other careers are available, looking after parks and open spaces I can tell you without any question that dogs and their ablutions is the number one complaint that I had to deal with. Whether it was the lack of bins (red or green), the siting of them, the emptying (nothing nicer than carrying a full bag several yards in blazing hot weather) to out of control dogs, dogs in play areas/tennis courts, it not being cleared. You name it I've dealt with it. Incidentally the reason there are two types of bin , red or green is because originally the sh.t was classed as hazardous waste and had to be incinerated. As a result it had to kept separate from ordinary waste. So my advice is two fold. Firstly when you see someone emptying a bin in a park go and thank them because it is literally a 'sh.t' job because if they didn't do it you would be ankle deep in the stuff very quickly. And secondly reinstate dog licences and charge people £1000 because that's the only way you'll get them to take serious just what they are required to do in having a dog. Rant over- I did say it was the bane of my life didn't I.

So spring has definitely sprung. First tulip flowers of the year.

She canner take it, Captain! Im going to lie down in a quiet room. All this excitment is just too much.

Not wishing to dent you upstanding in the community but you could always grass him up to the feds. I photo of the act along with some words ie he lives at so and so would probably elicit a visitation to said property along with some words - book him Jono. Whilst not as satisfying as your proposal it may elicit a more desirable result. Having said that it could also result in you being labelled a snitch and a visit from offender along with g his 'brothers' to have a 'word' . We would of course all chip in and get you a nice wreath and HH would offer to pull the hearse. Once he's been released that is on police bail pending enquires into the 'disappearance' of the miscreant.

Dear Sir I am writing to you in the hope that something can be done. You are my last resort. A certain Mr Peters keeps posting things on his thread. It must stop as I just can't keep up. It used to be alright as he would only post a couple of things such as photos and the occasional video. This wasn't too bad, although I suspect that the videos were being done professionally as they were just tooooo good. However he is now posting all the time and everything is just so good. So please go and have a word with him.. Please. Yours disgruntled and envious. Ian

Target practice Big H?

Well that's excellent news. It did cross my mind that you were going to announce that the missis had been banished to live with offspring and you were going to extend seven mills into Chateau Peters. Only briefly you understand. Glad its sorted. Ian

Being led astray by the Big H.

Ummmm 1938 didn't by any chance have an American accent did they?

You are very wise. I too am not normally a follower of the 'pig bladder troublers' so my apologies and I will go and stand in the corner. I must have had a fit of the vapers.

Many thanks NHN for your erudite explaination. It just shows how even the most simplest 'bangs' can have the most frightening of consequences. Many thanks to other ER's for allowing this indulgence and i promise in future not to cause irritation at such a blatant infringement of ER etiquette.

Not wishing to go too far of track, but I see your local kick ballers have parted company with their manager following there defeat on Sunday at the hands of Salford City FC.

Thats no way to talk about a mate. Yes he might be a bit higgeldy-piggeldy but no need to broadcast the fact. So long as its not going to trigger an episode of PTS but just how did you injure your foot? Playing footie with a cannon ball? Squashing it into a stilheto three sizes too small? Clogg dancing without cloggs?

You mean if they received a booking from HH.

So not nit picking or anything but what's to stop it rolling over with you inside.

Andy we've gone metric so your going to need convert that 11 inches into centimetres I'm afraid. So you're going to have to take all of that imperial 11 inches of insulation and replace instead with certified metric insulation.

Sorry to have to break it you Andy but the medico's have been at work and over eating is now classed as a medical condition.

Now your just showing off. Put it away man your embarrassing yourself