Steve K

Nicely-taken penalty by the new captain, but I'm not convinced that England will be cheered off the pitch if it's only 1-0 in 20 minutes' time...

I think Man U are in danger of the Fur Cup this season... In other news, I see that Wayne Rooney is now captain of England and Manchester United, thus ensuring that neither of them will win anything any time soon. Seriously, the schadenfreude at Manchester United's awfulness is starting to wear off. I'm actually getting fed up with them being crap, but appointing Rooney to his new position will be neutral at best, and possibly detrimental to the team's performance. He runs and runs tirelessly, I know, but so did Forrest Gump, and I wouldn't want him in charge of another 10 men, either. Is there some secret PL prize for the team whose captain picks up the most bookings and sending offs? Have UEFA turned the fair play rule on its head, or something? My biggest worry about the Man U situation is the thought that maybe they were always a bit average, but everyone was so scared of Fergie that they didn't notice.

Quite - if you can't read their handwriting, they can't play. Simple as that.

Suddenly, I feel a craving for bananas...

"If this is a repeat"? Most amusing! If that (still quite funny, I admit) joke hasn't been posted at least 5 times on here already, then I'm a monkey's uncle!

Apart from 35 years and 10 inches between them, it's uncanny! To be fair, Britney Spears and "presbyterians" are also anagrams, but they're not regularly mistaken for one another... Start with the "team" thing, and take it from there, I reckon. Nail. Head. Nectar points, you mean?

Of course, they can't unveil him at the stadium, due to the terms of his ban, so it's been suggested that the ceremony will occur at the side of a motorway. Apparently, Luis is a big fan of the hard shoulder...

Things you never hear at the World Cup, part 37: "I'm really looking forward to the 3rd place play-off tomorrow night!"

Well, there were 2 ex-PL players, in Gyan and Essien, but the rest were mostly unknowns to me. Incidentally, last night's match must have been one of the first internationals where 2 brothers played against each other! Carlos Queiroz looks far more impressive as manager of Iran than he did when we all thought he was simply Fergie's yes-man. Iran were desperately unlucky not to come away with another point.

At 5-2, I don't think that the French minded too much, even Benzema, who spent a good minute thinking he'd got the 6th! Not banking on it, no. If the manager is brave enough to play some of those who didn't get a game, maybe change the goalkeeper, give Rooney a well-earned(!) rest, then it's possible that a new-look England team might just go out and play for pride. After all, there's still the chance to avoid the disgrace of being 4th in the group!

Think you're being harsh on Lampard - he hasn't even been given the chance to be rubbish this time! Blimey, Michael, it's only a game! And really, do we think those 2 games were entirely down to Roy? I'd ask what the team psychologist has been doing for his money, if the players always turn into headless chickens when they concede the first goal. Mind you, the idea of Liverpool fans being generous supporters of the wider game has been destroyed for me already this year, but even so, surely you're not still bitter about Roy's tenure, of all things? In other words, Glen Johnson is not a defender. He's always been praised for his attacking prowess, but I have no idea why that qualifies him as a left back. James Milner would have been better in both capacities. Easier to start from the bottom, I suspect...

... and all of them were speaking up in defence of diving in the box. Awful. Still, most of the football has been much better that we've come to expect from opening matches, so I'm just going to try to ignore the idiot "experts" in the studio!

I also agree with Roy's sentiments in this matter, but don't forget that Spain managed to win the World Cup without any of their players singing along to the national anthem! I'm looking forward to the next time England play Liechtenstein, to see the confusion on the England players' faces when the opposition's anthem starts up...

Not at all, his brand of slightly bemused blokeishness is starting to grate on me, too. I used to find it quite endearing, but it's wearing a bit thin.

It's the punctuation that makes it funny.

Hi Can anyone enlighten me as to what that loop is for? I'm assuming that there was once a station, but the SE end of the loop doesn't join up with the main line. Thanks, and carry on with the game!

Possibly, Colin, but current referees are presumably also football fans who follow one club above all others - we just don't get to hear about it much. I'm not sure what, if any, bearing, this has on the matches at which they are allowed to officiate, but someone must have considered this. In the event they do appear to show bias, I dare say their boss would have something to say, and do, about it.

I haven't read the report, let alone read it in full (and I'm guessing that not many others have yet, either), so I'm going to avoid jumping on the anti-Dyke bandwagon, as the national media and many here have done, not until I'm much better informed. However, it seems that Mr Dyke and his team have tried to identify areas of concern, and create a discussion document with several possible ideas for improving those areas. I think we would mostly concur that promising English junior players, many of them at extremely successful clubs, disappear without trace by the age of 21 because their opportunities for 1st-team PL football are small or non-existent. Surely it is better to suggest one possible way in which young players could play competitive football than to suggest doing nothing at all. Yes, on reflection, putting them up against non-league blood-and-thunder teams might not be the ideal way to improve their skills, but at least they'd get a glimpse of the real world, where tattoos and Bentleys count for very little. The other areas of concern, such as the lack of English coaching talent, and the need for support for grass-roots football, are also pretty uncontroversial, I should have thought - we can all see that something needs to be done, but what? At least this commission has got us all talking. Another real area of concern to me (and as I say, I've only skimmed the news, so I don't know whether it was covered) is the scarcity of players who go on to become referees. We're all used to the likes of Shearer, Savage and so on, bemoaning in front of millions of MOTD viewers that the ref got a decision wrong because "he's never played the game". Well, why not get all these recently retired players with their big egos and bigger opinions to take a refereeing course, and show us all how it should be done? Personally, I think the current refs do a decent job under difficult circumstances, but we'll never know whether the ex-pros could do better until they give it a go!

Slight abuse of the word "tragic", even if you're a fan of LFC. Disappointing, frustrating, yes, but a tragedy? Worse things happen at sea, you know...

Where's the "groan" button... ?

I agree, Colin (and not only because I'm also a Chelsea fan!) - I just don't see the need for this hatred of other clubs that almost seems to outweigh support for one's own chosen team. Once rivalry goes so far beyond mere banter, I really worry that the fans concerned need to take a step back and think about what they are saying. OK, I've enjoyed a certain Schadenfreude at Man U's problems this season (it's nice that their supporters can no longer bang on about how they're not a sacking club, for instance), but I know it's only a temporary situation, and I don't hate them, or Liverpool, or anyone else. Certain individuals rile me quite badly, but not whole teams! The things I most dislike about the game are the stupid wages (which this season have made Rooney look like the most over-rated player in history - not his fault, as he would hardly say no to £300k per week, would he?), the cheating, and the encouragement of the cheating from many ex-pro pundits (eg "there was contact, so he had every right to fling himself to the floor").

Not entirely disagreeing with your sentiments about Wazza, but surely "world class" and "international class" mean exactly the same thing? Exactly what they do mean, of course, is very much open to debate...

I suppose BT will have paid over the odds if it turns out that they make no profit on the deal. However, while I agree with your sentiment (ie that the amount of money spent in and around football is ridiculous), I suspect that some very clever people at BT will have done a lot of work to ensure that they make money on the Champions League. Sky, too, have only "b*ggered up" football, cricket etc from the point of view of those who don't have Sky. Eveyone who does have it is presumably quite happy with what they've done (while simultaneously complaining about the silly amounts of money thrown around). It's probably the wrong place to ask (this being a football thread), but I'd love to know why you find athletics "pretty pointless". Of course, we all have sports we don't like - for me, boxing leaves me cold, as does racing, a sport that exists only so that people can bet on it - but I still see the point of them. Surely, finding out who is the fastest runner, the highest jumper, etc, is the purest kind of "point" to a sport that there is (and I'm by no means an athletics fanatic)?

Was that the Polish team?

And my question is "what's wrong with that?". What you get nowadays (in the same situation where a corner is awarded at the death) is that ref almost always allows play to go on until the defending side has cleared or until the ball is out of play. It shouldn't be like that - football is played for 90 minutes, plus any time that needs adding on. Unlike rugby union, there's no provision that I'm aware of which calls for play to continue until the ball is dead.