Claude_Dreyfus

S*******s I j*** f****** h*** l*****, I really ** :-(

This is Stockholm calling.....

People called Romanes they go the 'ouse

People called Romanes they go the 'ouse

The Living Daylights

Oh dear. The annual sock audit and related Konmari of the sock drawer, has revealed that I need to go sock shopping this lunchtime.

Full Southern timetable today. Hooray! First London Bridge train cancelled at Gatwick, second only 8 coaches instead of 12 and this evening's train will only stop at 4 out of 14 stations due to a camera fault. Just like old times!

Warwells to the left of me, warwells to the right, here I am, stuck in the middle with you!

Well with the uk leaving the EU! Trump in charge of the US! Ex-ukip leader heading over there. And nuclear missile which can't tell east from west! What can possibly go wrong!

Well with the uk leaving the EU! Trump in charge of the US! Ex-ukip leader heading over there. And nuclear missile which can't tell east from west! What can possibly go wrong!

Wonders when Aunt Bessie's roasties are going to start carrying Government health warnings.

Wonders when Aunt Bessie's roasties are going to start carrying Government health warnings.

I've got £5.. looks it's worth £4, £3, £2..

Do I not like orange - RIP Graham Taylor.

..has woken up in Helsinki this morning. .

recommends craunching a marmoset.

Mobby Dyk

Definition of justice? How about Southern's Director of Passenger services having to stand on the packed 17:57 to Brighton because everything else has been cancelled? #luckyforhernobodyknowsherfromadam #smallscalepayback

really should remember not to sit in the local curry house with his trouser zip undone. It makes the staff very unhappy.

really should remember not to sit in the local curry house with his trouser zip undone. It makes the staff very unhappy.

really should remember not to sit in the local curry house with his trouser zip undone. It makes the staff very unhappy.

Would anyone care for a turkey sandwich ......... or perhaps some turkey curry.

Squirty McBumchunder is in residence for Christmas

Time for a Yule log

Has just realised he is down to his last 3 pints of milk, 5 tins of beans, two loaves of bread, 8 bottles of wine, 10 bottles of beer, and 2 tubs of twigglets to last the Christmas weekend. Emergency trip to the supermarket may be required...