The Night Mail

[AndyID]

This was the rear-end of the much-relayed XC

 

Some might be familiar with the message although it was sometimes followed by "and bring your knitting".

 

It was a sort of hint that I liked to ski but it was also a veiled threat to my employer that I would buffer-off back to Idaho if the company didn't perform. (It didn't and I did.)

 

The best bit was when a Lexus buzzed me on the freeway. His plate read "EBYGUM". Clearly a former native of the Home Counties.

 

 

 

Edited November 18, 2021 by AndyID
Doh

[Dunsignalling]

1 hour ago, polybear said:

 

There is at least one model of Volvo where it's necessary to practically dismantle the front of the car in order to change a headlight bulb (pre-LED).  I wonder what superstar came up with that design - and the Bozo's that approved it....

Quite common on some 1990s cars, I think. One of the Renault Meganes (the model with the weird shaped back end IIRC) was a particular bu99er. The "book" method took something like 1.5 hours per side but certain mechanics discovered they could do both sides in less than that by removing  the front bumper. 

 

Even where dismantling wasn't necessary there were some quirky arrangements. I had a Peugeot 206 and, whilst changing headlight bulbs was a doddle (so long as ones hands weren't too big), sufficient grip to release the fog light clips could only be exerted from directly below. That necessitated putting the car on a ramp, so it was a garage job! Working from the side, even with the wheel removed, got you nowhere. 

 

John  

Edited November 18, 2021 by Dunsignalling

[Dunsignalling]

56 minutes ago, laurenceb said:

Headlights should be repairable by the roadside without major surgery (and tail lights)

and without tools, IMHO.

 

John

[PhilJ W]

The easiest car that I had for changing bulbs was a 1988 Nissan Prairie. You just unplugged the bulb holder from the back of the reflector. The rear lights you just released the press studs holding the interior panels first.

[Dunsignalling]

54 minutes ago, laurenceb said:

On the subject of deliveries, we had a chain break on the combine. A replacement had to come from Belgium which duly arrived the following morning. On opening the box it turned out to have been made in Burton, about 7 miles from its ultimate home.

If you needed new brake discs on 1990s Peugeots, they came in boxes marked Peugeot at one price or Hepolite for half that.

 

Having opened the boxes, guess the difference. Yep, just the price....

 

John

Edited November 18, 2021 by Dunsignalling

[Stubby47]

1 hour ago, jamie92208 said:

Simples, book a ticket from Leeds to Heysham harbour leaving after 12 noon. It sends you via Liverpool and Douglas with an overnight stay in Douglas.  Remarkably cheap though.

 

An excellent suggestion, apart from the starting from Leeds bit.

 

I'm in Cornwall...

[SM42]

My nearside headlight, Honda Accord, require you to partially unclip the wheel arch liner, disconnect the air filter supply pipe, remove rear lamp cover, unclip lamp and remove.

Then carry out the Haynes SOP to fit the new one. 

 

All this is done by feel whilst up to your armpit in the wheel arch. 

 

Oh and don't touch the new halogen lamp against anything in the process.

 

I find paying the dealer to do it a better bet. (£20 here,£8 in the Motherland) They take about 45 minutes to do the job.  The Poles are a little quicker.

 

I've got a sidelights to do, but IIRC that is less hassle

 

Andy

[Happy Hippo]

2 hours ago, laurenceb said:

Headlights should be repairable by the roadside without major surgery (and tail lights)

I had the same conversation with a roads policing officer a few years back.

 

The nearside headlight lamp had failed on my Fiat Tipo (which was a brilliant car).

 

I had the replacement and it's receipt on the passenger seat as I'd just bought it from the local motor factors and was going home to fix it in the morning.

 

I was stopped and asked whether I knew I had a defective front headlight.

 

I replied that I did, produced the bulb and receipt to show what a responsible person I was, and asked the member of the constabulary if he was that concerned, would he help me fit the new lamp to the vehicle, so I could drive home 'legally'.  I had tried when I got the new lamp but had been unsuccessful in my repairs.

 

Since it was cold, dark and raining, assistance was not really forthcoming and I was set on my way.

 

But not before he'd had a look, and had come to the conclusion that car designers were all failed gynaecologists, who still insisted in everything being able to be worked on through an awkwardly placed small hole.

[BR60103]

I went to our dealer to have a headlight bulb replaced on our Focus. The fellow behind the counter asked if we had cruise control (we didn't). He said that on his Focus, the cruise control module was placed directly behind the headlight and had to be shifted to change the bulb.

 

[iL Dottore]

All this talk of complicated car repairs makes me pine for two of my very first cars: a 1960s first generation Ford Falcon and a 70s Plymouth Fury (ex Police). Both pretty reasonable cars, both very simple to fix, but both devoid of the creature comforts (and safety features) that we now take for granted.

 

It may be hard for the young folk to believe, but I used to drive cars without power windows, central locking, air conditioning or even seat belts! (although the latter IS going back quite a bit….)

[AndyID]

A lady showed up at the door today. She wanted to know if I would help support another lady who was running for Lieutenant Governor or something like that. I asked if she was running as a Republican or a Democrat.

 

She didn't hang about.

 

[pH]

4 minutes ago, AndyID said:

A lady showed up at the door today. She wanted to know if I would help support another lady who was running for Lieutenant Governor or something like that. I asked if she was running as a Republican or a Democrat.

 

She didn't hang about.

 

We have multi-party elections. We often take a yard sign for one party, and it ensures we don’t get any visits like that - one party presumes they’ve got votes here, and the others don’t think it’s worth knocking the door. Only downside is a possible difference of opinion with neighbours (if they’re neighbours we care about!).

[jamie92208]

6 hours ago, Stubby47 said:

 

An excellent suggestion, apart from the starting from Leeds bit.

 

I'm in Cornwall...

Even more simple move oop North. There's space now that we've moved to France.

 

Jamie

Edited November 19, 2021 by jamie92208

[TheQ]

Many Audi's need half the front of the car removing to change a bulb, I believe some even have their bonnet screwed down with just cover for oil, water, etc

Perhaps this is why Audi indicators don't work... Not sure why BMW indicators don't work though..

[AndyID]

32 minutes ago, pH said:

We have multi-party elections. We often take a yard sign for one party, and it ensures we don’t get any visits like that - one party presumes they’ve got votes here, and the others don’t think it’s worth knocking the door. Only downside is a possible difference of opinion with neighbours (if they’re neighbours we care about!).

 

We'd do something like that but there are so many total headbangers here it would actually be quite dangerous. The extent of political polarization in the US is quite incredible. It's almost impossible to have any sort of meaningful dialogue with someone from "the other side". I have tried but it's completely pointless.

 

I am not at all optimistic about the future of the US. It never really was a democracy and if certain elements get their way it will descend into a complete dictatorship. I hope ROW is as alarmed as I am.

[AndyID]

50 minutes ago, AndyID said:

 

We'd do something like that but there are so many total headbangers here it would actually be quite dangerous. The extent of political polarization in the US is quite incredible. It's almost impossible to have any sort of meaningful dialogue with someone from "the other side". I have tried but it's completely pointless.

 

I am not at all optimistic about the future of the US. It never really was a democracy and if certain elements get their way it will descend into a complete dictatorship. I hope ROW is as alarmed as I am.

 

Adding on a bit from there the US Dollar is a dominant currency for two reasons - volume and stability. If stability goes out the window it will tank.

[Dave Hunt]

8 hours ago, Dunsignalling said:

If you needed new brake discs on 1990s Peugeots, they came in boxes marked Peugeot at one price or Hepolite for half that.

 

Having opened the boxes, guess the difference. Yep, just the price....

 

John

 

The auto gearbox torque converter on my old BMW failed and when I took it in for repair the chap in the garage (which was a main agent) said that I could have a BMW one at £X or a ZF one at about half £X. I asked him what the difference was and he said, "One has BMW on the side, the other has ZF." Guess which one I chose? 

 

Dave

[Stubby47]

1 hour ago, jamie92208 said:

Even more simple move oop North. There's space now that we've moved to France.

 

Jamie

 

So you've moved all the way to France to get away from oop North, but you're suggesting I move there ??

Edited November 19, 2021 by Stubby47

[iL Dottore]

2 minutes ago, Stubby47 said:

 

So you've moved all the way to France to get away from oop North, but you're suggesting I move there ??

Oh, I don’t know, Stubby. I could well imagine you in a beret, stripy jersey with a Gauloises Caporal drooping nonchalantly from a lower lip, as you reply to a question about delivery dates with a Gallic shrug……

 

It worked for @jamie92208 

[polybear]

8 hours ago, PhilJ W said:

The easiest car that I had for changing bulbs was a 1988 Nissan Prairie. You just unplugged the bulb holder from the back of the reflector. The rear lights you just released the press studs holding the interior panels first.

 

Ricky the Rover:

Open the hatchback, remove the plastic cover over the relevant lamp cluster (2off 1/4 turn screws) and you have access to all the bulbs.  What we have now is called "progress" 

Mickey the MG is very quick too, though it does need a screwdriver.  The front are fairly quick too

 

 

6 hours ago, Happy Hippo said:

I had the same conversation with a roads policing officer a few years back.

 

The nearside headlight lamp had failed on my Fiat Tipo (which was a brilliant car).

 

I had the replacement and it's receipt on the passenger seat as I'd just bought it from the local motor factors and was going home to fix it in the morning.

 

I was stopped and asked whether I knew I had a defective front headlight.

 

I replied that I did, produced the bulb and receipt to show what a responsible person I was, and asked the member of the constabulary if he was that concerned, would he help me fit the new lamp to the vehicle, so I could drive home 'legally'.  I had tried when I got the new lamp but had been unsuccessful in my repairs.

 

Since it was cold, dark and raining, assistance was not really forthcoming and I was set on my way.

 

But not before he'd had a look, and had come to the conclusion that car designers were all failed gynaecologists, who still insisted in everything being able to be worked on through an awkwardly placed small hole.

 

Uncle Psycho Bear (RIP) got a speed camera fine once (Auntie Bear knew nothing about it) - he successfully got it cancelled as:

(a) W. Sussex Police had a policy of only putting cameras in accident blackspots - and this spot wasn't.

(b) He temporarily couldn't see the speedo properly, cos' it was night time (=dark) and the dash bulb had blown - and here's the garage bill to fix it.

Bear was amazed he pulled it off - but he did; I saw the paperwork when I was helping Auntie Bear sort his papers.

 

1 hour ago, pH said:

We have multi-party elections. We often take a yard sign for one party, and it ensures we don’t get any visits like that - one party presumes they’ve got votes here, and the others don’t think it’s worth knocking the door. Only downside is a possible difference of opinion with neighbours (if they’re neighbours we care about!).

 

Put a sign out for The Monster Raving Looney Party (or whatever the US equivalent is).  The neighbours (a) won't take you seriously (hopefully), and (b) leave you alone out of pity - or in case you're nuts too and have an M16 under the bed.

 

6 minutes ago, Dave Hunt said:

 

The auto gearbox torque converter on my old BMW failed and when I took it in for repair the chap in the garage (which was a main agent) said that I could have a BMW one at £X or a ZF one at about half £X. I asked him what the difference was and he said, "One has BMW on the side, the other has ZF." Guess which one I chose? 

 

Dave

 

I heard of one where the guys' dad went for a VW Air filter from the dealership:

"You can have this VW one for forty quid, or this IDENTICAL  one but in a Skoda cardboard box for twenty quid"

"Oh no, I want the genuine VW one!! "

 

You just can't help some people.... 

[TheQ]

I though the previous administration was the Monster Raving loony party..

[PhilJ W]

2 hours ago, AndyID said:

 

We'd do something like that but there are so many total headbangers here it would actually be quite dangerous. The extent of political polarization in the US is quite incredible. It's almost impossible to have any sort of meaningful dialogue with someone from "the other side". I have tried but it's completely pointless.

 

I am not at all optimistic about the future of the US. It never really was a democracy and if certain elements get their way it will descend into a complete dictatorship. I hope ROW is as alarmed as I am.

 

8 minutes ago, TheQ said:

I though the previous administration was the Monster Raving loony party..

Before things get too political I would just like to say that its surprising that someone as completely ignorant as the previous occupant of the white house ever got there in the first place. 

[AndyID]

Sadly 50% Scottish.

[Dave Hunt]

1 hour ago, Stubby47 said:

 

So you've moved all the way to France to get away from oop North, but you're suggesting I move there ??

 

What makes you think that Jamie's move was voluntary? The folks from Oop North  may well have had a say in the matter and remember that antagonism toward the French is well rooted in English history........

 

Dave

[Dave Hunt]

1 minute ago, AndyID said:

Sadly 50% Scottish.

 

Talk about something that will forever be difficult to live down....

 

For the Scots I mean.

 

Dave