Early Risers.

[Smiffy2]

The whelkmen of Carshalton-sur-Mer, where to begin, where to start…

 

It was in the dark days following the return of the Bourbon dynasty to France (1814) that the pro-Revolutionary whelk fishermen of Brittany and Normandy made a run for it to the southern coast of England.

Knowing that their revolutionary, nay Napoleonic views would not go down well with the people of Bournemouth and Worthing they paddled their coracles across the channel, traditional bright colours overpainted with an early form of dazzle camouflage, but their navigational skills, always a weak point, led them astray, and after a lot of frustration they ended up on the River Wandle, at the place they, optimistically, named Carshalton-sur-Mer.  There they fashioned their crude huts and carried on their unsophisticated lifestyle, still clinging to the Revolutionary Calendar, even though it had been abandoned in France in 1806. They arrived on 21st Fructidor in Year XIX. The use of this calendar - up to the present day (29 Pluviose CCXXXI) - has caused many problems…

 

Having set up home on the banks of the Wandle, a pleasant chalk stream well stocked with ducks, swans and presumably whelks, they began to trade. The local people were not particularly enthusiastic, and the Whelkmen have always been a separate group within the community. They have always kept their own traditions, including  rather obscure Saint’s Days and cultural events such as the weekly Belting The Whelk ceremony. This is, of course, held in private.

 

I am often asked about the Whelkmen’s domestic arrangements. Of course, over the years they have intermarried with the local population, tending to have short, dark sons and tall, willowy daughters. This cannot be explained by normal genetics. They tend to take names from their heroes de la revolution, and their current leader (Chef des Bulots) is one Jean-Paul Robespierre III, who has a particularly fetching coracle for which he is rightly famous. Often one hears the cry “Jean-Paul, show us yer coracle”. He always obliges.

One of the difficulties they face is that whelks are not commonly found in the Wandle, and so whelking days are restricted so as not to overfish. Neither are whelks particularly popular with the general population (or Wockles as the Whelkmen call them). Therefore whelking days are limited, most whelkmen making their living from other trades, such as training racing swans or making lavender bags from discarded Iron Maiden tee shirts, often found in the bushes alongside the river.

 

Today the whelkmen are a small, self-sufficient community, providing a semi-popular service to a limited number of patrons in the local area. Their fame has not spread far, like Marmite on a cold day. They are content to carry on in their traditional manner, wearing traditional nineteenth century whelksmocks, speaking their own patois (Whelshk) and singing their old revolutionary songs, notably La Mayonnaise. “Aux whelks, citoyens,

mangez vos crustaceans!

Bulot, bulot, qu’un whelk impur,

vous provoque des crampes d’estomac!”

 

Watch out for further bulletins.

Written on the feast of Saint Fiesta of Dagenham

Edited February 17 by Smiffy2

[Gwiwer]

I still can’t see the garden gate from the porch. This is a real thick fog and it’s raining through it too. 
 

We have to set off soon for our 60-mile trek. Is this why they call our destination “Lostwithiel”?  

[southern42]

' afternoon all from red dragon land.

Wet stuff has started falling from the sky. 10.8C though I doubt it feels it in the hoolie out there.

 

Feeling a bit sorry for myself today since last Saturday's small procedure, which I was offered at the last minute, renders it inadvisable to go galavanting round the country* to see some fav flute players in concert down darn sarf. Shame because they are on a world tour.

 

*At least two trains worth to get there, probably more the next day, plus a night away.

 

One of my fav vids of them:

 

To add to the disappointment, the unmentionable in a long box from the far sou'west, which was due between 9am and 1130am this morning, has not yet arrived. If it did come up, the Carrier probably saw the narrow road and quick turned back down the hill!

At least my toot on the flute was a bit better this morning. 😁

 

Off to do a mugadecaf.

Take care. Be good... and...er...what was I saying about being patient, yesterday?

Polly

 

Edited February 17 by southern42
suvvern typo

[DaveF]

Just to let you know i am back home.

 

I had a good ride to the Nuffield yesterday afternoon with Mick, one of my neighbours.  I was quickly admitted and prepared for the surgery.  I went to sleep just after 5.30 and was back in my room having a meal just before 8p.m.  Just a very nice tomato soup with things beside tomatoes, then cheese and pickle sandwiches on granary bread.  I had a choice of 8 different sandwiches and several cooked things but opted for sandwiches as I wasn't sure when I'd be able to eat.  I didn't sleep too well as I became more alert as my anaesthetic after effects wore off so I lay in bed and daydreamed.  This morning I felt surprisingly well rested.  I was given a cup of tea at 6.30a.m. along with my medication.  Then breakfast at 8a.m. - just Weetabix followed by toast and marmalade.  I decided I could not face a full English breakfast, even though I could choose how many things I wanted from the 7 or 8 on offer - sausages, bacon, eggs, tomatoes, baked beans etc.

 

Then various people visited to make sure I was OK, medication was given me to bring home  (painkillers and laxatives) and I was allowed home at 11.00.  Ged, a model railway friend, brought me home and also gave me fresh ready meals for today and tomorrow which was very kind of him.  I have to wear anti-embolism stockings for 6 weeks which have been given to me, though I may order some more so I can wash them in batches to make life easier.

 

I have a thick padded dressing to protect things for a few days, then that can be removed.  Under it is a smaller dressing which remains in place for 14 days.  All the flesh stitches are soluble in three separate layers of the body.  The mesh is self sticking put held in place by stitches which will decompose eventually.

 

I now have to be careful, not lift more than a kettle of water, not cross my legs, not strain on the loo, not drive for now and do gentle walks as the tiredness wears off.

 

I will not do anything later today, just read and watch TV or similar.  All being well I'll post something tomorrow here but not photos just yet.

 

David

[woodenhead]

Spent yesterday pootling around south Manchester on the tram.

 

Trafford Centre to Didsbury via Altrincham and Media City (in that order, don't ask).

 

But it was £8 for the two of us to leisurely travel within zones 2,3 & 4 and I realised later that you couldn't do the equivalent on the north side as there is no comparible Cornbrook interchange meaning you need to the purchase the full system pass - not that it is really a lot more.

 

Mrs W found a brilliant little Gluten Free cafe called Off the Wheaten Track in altrincham so we went there and it was so nice to have somewhere she can simply purchase off the menu without having to worry, think we will make a few visits here lots to choose from.

 

Then it was back to Media City for a look around a gym for her followed by alchohol as we had time to kill and it was getting dark before off to number one son's house in Didsbury for one of his homemade wonders, that boy sure can cook before a late couple of trams back home.

 

So much easier than drving and we'll be doing this again as it offers a lot of places to visit for walking, food and drink.

[Tony_S]

9 minutes ago, DaveF said:

will not do anything later today, just read and watch TV or similar. 

Sounds very sensible. Glad it all went well.

[PhilJ W]

Afternoon all from Estuary-Land. I received my Tesco Clubcard vouchers the other day, £20.50 worth. I usually spend them on topping up the petrol but at the moment the car doesn't need topping up. They have made changes and they've ceased giving money off and extra points vouchers. I then noticed that the cash vouchers are valid for two years and can be spent* on a Railcard or on the Channel Tunnel Shuttle. *They also double in value when you spend them with Reward Partners so my £20.50 becomes £41. 

[New Haven Neil]

2 hours ago, Gwiwer said:

Is this why they call our destination “Lostwithiel”?  

 

A'noon.  Mrs NHN (her being a Corn and all) has her sis and an aunt in that town, known to us as LostwithNeil.  

 

On the subject of Mrs NHN, the camera obviously found no sunshine where it went, but found nothing else, thankfully.  Odd, as the test she keeps having strongly suggests something is VERY wrong up there.  So a good result, but still more questions than answers, we await the next steps slightly relieved but not convinced.

 

Nice to see @Dave F Dave F recovering well, take care Dave, nice and easy does it.  The Whelkmen too, who have been absent from the news for so long, and their most impressive coracles.

[TheQ]

Afternoon Awl,

Much muddling done, 1 kg added to the unmentionable...

How do I know 1 kg?

That's the weight of the airdrying clay I've applied using a stone sett roller.. 

It will get lighter as it dries, but not by much...

 

Much painting of lorries.

 

Ben took me for his short walk, it's was slightly sunny then , now it's getting dark and windy.

 

Thinking of planting seaweed here, it would be appropriate for the soggy not of the garden.

 

 

[southern42]

54 minutes ago, Smiffy2 said:

The whelkmen of Carshalton-sur-Mer, where to begin, where to start…

 

It was in the dark days following the return of the Bourbon dynasty to France (1814) that the pro-Revolutionary whelk fishermen of Brittany and Normandy made a run for it to the southern coast of England.

Knowing that their revolutionary, nay Napoleonic views would not go down well with the people of Bournemouth and Worthing they paddled their coracles across the channel, traditional bright colours overpainted with an early form of dazzle camouflage, but their navigational skills, always a weak point, led them astray, and after a lot of frustration they ended up on the River Wandle, at the place they, optimistically, named Carshalton-sur-Mer.  There they fashioned their crude huts and carried on their unsophisticated lifestyle, still clinging to the Revolutionary Calendar, even though it had been abandoned in France in 1806. They arrived on 21st Fructidor in Year XIX. The use of this calendar - up to the present day (29 Pluviose CCXXXI) - has caused many problems…

 

Having set up home on the banks of the Wandle, a pleasant chalk stream well stocked with ducks, swans and presumably whelks, they began to trade. The local people were not particularly enthusiastic, and the Whelkmen have always been a separate group within the community. They have always kept their own traditions, including  rather obscure Saint’s Days and cultural events such as the weekly Belting The Whelk ceremony. This is, of course, held in private.

 

I am often asked about the Whelkmen’s domestic arrangements. Of course, over the years they have intermarried with the local population, tending to have short, dark sons and tall, willowy daughters. This cannot be explained by normal genetics. They tend to take names from their heroes de la revolution, and their current leader (Chef des Bulots) is one Jean-Paul Robespierre III, who has a particularly fetching coracle for which he is rightly famous. Often one hears the cry “Jean-Paul, show us yer coracle”. He always obliges.

One of the difficulties they face is that whelks are not commonly found in the Wandle, and so whelking days are restricted so as not to overfish. Neither are whelks particularly popular with the general population (or Wockles as the Whelkmen call them). Therefore whelking days are limited, most whelkmen making their living from other trades, such as training racing swans or making lavender bags from discarded Iron Maiden tee shirts, often found in the bushes alongside the river.

 

Today the whelkmen are a small, self-sufficient community, providing a semi-popular service to a limited number of patrons in the local area. Their fame has not spread far, like Marmite on a cold day. They are content to carry on in their traditional manner, wearing traditional nineteenth century whelksmocks, speaking their own patois (Whelshk) and singing their old revolutionary songs, notably La Mayonnaise. “Aux whelks, citoyens,

mangez vos crustaceans!

Bulot, bulot, qu’un whelk impur,

vous provoque des crampes d’estomac!”

 

Watch out for further bulletins.

Written on the feast of Saint Fiesta of Dagenham

 

Interesting the Revolution should come up. In the last few days, I have been the recipient of some of the findings of family members who have been delving into our past history. In one line, I had been told many years ago, I had links to the Protestant Huguenots. It now comes to light that it was the French Revolution that caused a particular nth great granddaddyparrot to be brought, Moses like across the water, with his "Nanny" to nest here. (I wonder how many other young nestlings were saved this way?) This parrot later paired up with nth great grandnannyparrot, the offspring of a famous seafarer who met trouble at sea. So, it appears I come from some aristocratic and well to do parrots, far removed from my working class upbringing.

 

So, I guess that is one way to learn about the subjects I opted out of at school! Remembering names and dates was never my strong point. Now had it been a map, picture or story based subject rather than ever increasing lists of dates, I might have a broader knowledge of what went on in the world. I did catch up a bit with History in art and music but only as it impacted on artists, musicians and composers but interesting and informative nonetheless. Now, it is my very own forebears that are enlightening me but, of course, to work out the route you need a list of names and dates!

 

Polly Parrot

[Ozexpatriate]

8 hours ago, Tony_S said:

Now they seem to be investigating what look like post apocalyptic planting in rubble. 

Very 'normal' these days in the US desert southwest - think Arizona, Nevada, inland southern California - where plants like these are native species.

 

Living in those places is not sustainable and green lawns are the absolute worst. In that climate artificial turf is not a great option either - it can get hot and photodegrades emitting polymer fragments into the ground and even the air.

 

There's a push for similar approaches in the high deserts (chaparral / sage / junipers)  west of the mountains from California to Washington.

 

Less necessary in an English garden.

 

It's a hobby horse, but I think the use of potable town water for landscape irrigation should be illegal everywhere. Reclamation of rainwater and even grey water should be a mandatory part of every structure when constructed (as should solar power). If you have enough reclaimed water for your garden and car-washing - fabulous. I wanted to do something like this when I built my house but my builder didn't have the proficiency.

 

Rainwater reclamation was de rigueur in Australia until town water appeared and corrugated iron water tanks were ubiquitous - still are in rural areas. Much less so now in 'town'. They *should* be everywhere. The humble tank (a big green plastic thing buried in the yard will do) is not that expensive to include when building from new.

 

Edited February 17 by Ozexpatriate

[Ozexpatriate]

6 hours ago, Smiffy2 said:

The use of this calendar - up to the present day (29 Pluviose CCXXXI) - has caused many problems…

Wish les hommes des bulots un bon 29 Pluviose CCXXXI for us, would you? 😉

 

Edited February 17 by Ozexpatriate

[Coombe Barton]

... Spaniel puppy Poppy was collected last night by son. A few growls, the rabbit telling her where to get off but settling in. ...

https://johncolby.wordpress.com/2024/02/17/covid-another-chart-shows-up-hot-february-already-and-poppy/

[Tony_S]

20 minutes ago, Ozexpatriate said:

Less necessary in an English garden

The RHS is very optimistic. No matter what happens they will be there for gardeners. 
It is fairly dry and rarely frosty here, though the last few winters have been record breakingly wet, though not by the standards elsewhere in the UK. Yucca and agave grow here, we don’t have any. We do have a couple of small olive trees. People with plants like tree fern or bananas have to wrap them in fleece over the colder months though. The palm trees on the sea front at Southend must be from one of the more hardy varieties. 
Tony

[Tony_S]

48 minutes ago, Coombe Barton said:

Spaniel puppy Poppy was collected last night by son. A few growls, the rabbit telling her where to get off but settling in. ..

When we bought Robbie home our hamster Coco made it quite clear she was senior pet. He never bothered her. Hamsters are amazingly self confdent, convinced they can intimidate much larger creatures. 

Edited February 17 by Tony_S

[Ozexpatriate]

11 hours ago, iL Dottore said:

Finally, on the subject of copyright: why haven’t the corporate lawyers of far-too-many-to-mention companies descended on Amazon, en-masse, like the proverbial ton of bricks?

Because copyright law largely applies to things like the printed word, artistic image, written or recorded music or motion pictures.

 

There are broadly three categories of intellectual properties:

• Copyright
• Trademark
• Invention / patent

Copyright does not apply to shapes where you could argue that function dictates form. A firearms manufacturers like Colt, Glock or Smith and Wesson could hardly argue the shape of a sidearm with barrel, trigger and handle as "copyright".

 

Nor is shape a protected invention - as Apple found out when they tried to declare that the form factor of the iPhone was an "invention" and that other companies who built rectangular telephones violated their invention. Suits were settled but Apple did not get the "win" they wanted.

 

Trademark is relevant. Perhaps looking at a manufacturer's trademark notices might be illustrative.  You'll find BMW's here. The "split grill" is not a blanket trademark, but it does appear in detailed descriptions of some models.

 

There are some specific exceptions. "Artwork" for the appearance of a circuit board or semiconductor layout (which is essentially manufacturing data - a 'blueprint" if you will) can be protected in a manner similar to copyright - but distinctly different as a "mask work".

 

EDIT: 

I should add that software is protected under copyright law - the code is an extension of the printed word.

 

Edited February 17 by Ozexpatriate

[PupCam]

Evening All

 

10 hours ago, iL Dottore said:

I would argue that cheap Chinese knockoffs are far worse for the mercantile well-being of developed countries than a small (Western) company making a limited number of copies of long-defunct and out of production classic cars (I don’t see why JLB [or other big company] don’t approach such tiny manufacturers not with writs but with an offer of a licence to build replicas if the replica manufacturer can meet certain standards).

 

True but I would suggest they don't do so because it is difficult impossible to nail jelly to a wall which is what it would be like doing I would imagine.

 

10 hours ago, monkeysarefun said:

Though  that said - that thing would be heaps of fun to try on the Lake Eyre  or Lake Gairdner  salt flats!  (Is that @PupCam at 1:05?)

 

Sadly not although that Beeza looks frightfully modern.  Why, it's even got Tele forks so is probably only 75 years old! 🤣

 

7 hours ago, Sidecar Racer said:

 Nice video but sadly ruined by the music .

 

I've heard far worse and, on the right video it would be OK although I can't help thinking the noise from the combustion of petrol and air would have been adequate in this case at best or at worse swap the respective volumes of the music and the exhaust notes.

 

ION

 

A most pleasant day was spent with a certain Mr P. Bear at the East Beds MRC exhibition in Biggleswade.  Fortunately at no time did I have to reach for my Bosch Cordless Bear Tormentor!  © @iL Dottore      We happened to stumble on the primary contributor to Wright Writes and in between his customers we spent some time putting the world to rights once again.   Once again, the world probably wasn't listening.    It's loss ....

 

Having said only yesterday I haven't had a curry for ages due to the potential after effects during the night, when I got home I found an invitation to Junior Puppers for a curry!     Oh well, you have to live dangerously sometimes and I have to say it was very nice indeed.    Industrial doses of GAV are on stand-by and I suspect I'll be propped up for most of the night.    Wish me luck 🤣

 

TTFN

 

 

[grandadbob]

Evenin' each,

It's raining here and is forecast to stay wet until about 01.00.

Glad to hear that Dave's surgery went OK.  Mine was over 5 weeks ago and no problems had whatsoever.  Not supposed to do heavy lifting or violent exercise after the op for 6-8 weeks.  TBH I haven't done violent exercise for some considerable time...years in fact and have no intention of starting that lark again.  I've not had any problems with lifting things but am still being very careful.

Lazy day for me but I have muddled a bit and painted some small scenic items.  I received a 6 bottle case of wine from Laithwaites which was a special offer I couldn't refuse as it contained some of my favourite wines.  Rugby watched and enjoyed as usual and fish and chips had for dinner.

Will probably don the headphones now and listen to some music....still haven't got around to trying to play my guitar(s).

 

[Andy Hayter]

11 hours ago, iL Dottore said:

Finally, on the subject of copyright: why haven’t the corporate lawyers of far-too-many-to-mention companies descended on Amazon, en-masse, like the proverbial ton of bricks? Any time you type in a name brand item (such as - for sake of humourous illustration - a Bosch Cordless Bear Tormentor) into the Amazon search engine, amongst the first things that pop up are not only the Bosch item but also many crap Chinese identical-looking copies* of the Bosch machine with names like XFGXZL and STARDRIVER.  And that’s if you’re lucky, many times I’ve looked for a name brand item on Amazon.co.uk, Amazon.de and Amazon.it, only to be offered just the knock offs (although sometimes you can bypass the Amazon search engine by going to Google and typing in something like “Bosch Cordless Bear Tormentor on Amazon.de” and get a link directly to the item).

 

 

 

I am not sure how not showing you what you searched for is a breach of copyright.

It is just a measure of a cr@p search engine - deliberately designed thus  or though incompetence.  

 

Amazon, Ebay, Google, Yahoo and many other please note.

[Tony_S]

13 minutes ago, Andy Hayter said:

It is just a measure of a cr@p search engine - deliberately designed thus  or though incompetence.  

Amazon’s search engine returning lots of things they do sell instead of things they don’t actually sell sounds quite deliberate to me@nd not incompetent. 

[pH]

7 hours ago, DaveF said:

… I was quickly admitted and prepared for the surgery.  I went to sleep just after 5.30 (p.m.) … I was allowed home at 11.00 (a.m.) …

 

(Italics are my assumptions about times.)

When I had that surgery, I arrived at the hospital at 8 a.m. and was sitting (gingerly) on the couch at home at 12 noon!

Edited February 17 by pH

[Ozexpatriate]

3 minutes ago, pH said:

When I had that surgery, I arrived at the hospital at 8 a.m. and was sitting (gingerly) on the couch at home at 12 noon!

 I would expect a similar discharge velocity at US hospitals, but you'd be barely past initial recovery from general anesthesia at that point. Can you urinate? OK, we'll send you home.

[RobAllen]

Successfully spoke and attended a technical conference in London and then today made it to Kettering for the Midland Railway Society meeting. Two excellent talks that I very much enjoyed. Unfortunately my train home was delayed by 10 mins at Kettering which meant that I missed my connections at Leicester and New St, leading to arriving home over an hour and a quarter later than intended.

[Ohmisterporter]

1 hour ago, Tony_S said:

Hamsters are amazingly self confident, convinced they can intimidate much larger creatures. 

 

I bet we have all known people just like that.

[PhilJ W]

Evening all from Estuary-Land. The dampness has arrived here as well, Arthur Itis gave notice of its arrival a few hours ago. I didn't go to Tess Coes this afternoon after all, I have sufficient supplies until Monday so I had an eyelid inspection instead.