Adrian Wintle Posted June 7, 2012 Share Posted June 7, 2012 PLD just jogged my memory of another one: Barb Wire - the remake of Casablanca with Pamela Anderson in the role of Rick... Adrian Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
iL Dottore Posted June 7, 2012 Share Posted June 7, 2012 My girlfriend is a fan of girly movies, or 'Jenny and the Pretty Dress' movies as I like to call them, much to her chagrin.... Ah, yes. The infamous "chick-flick". Mrs iD occasionally succumbs and has a "ladies evening", taking over the home cinema with her girlfriends and watching something execrable like Ghosts of Girlfriends Past... Fortunately, I get banished to the cellar during such evenings (let me clarify, my workshop is in the cellar..) I have to add my vote for Starship Troopers, it didn't get a key message of the Heinlein book (i.e. you have to earn your citizen's rights [which you may or may not agree with]) nor was it that bad enough to be good (a bit like reverse Kitsch) plus it was chock-full of bad science. F p.s. somebody nominated the zombie movie 28 Days Later. Now, once a person dies, he/she starts to decompose and fall apart once the body's cells stop self repairing. Given that the zombies portrayed in films always seem to be decomposing, one must thus presume that whatever animates them doesn't also restart their cellular processes. Which leads me to ask, why not sit tight and wait for decomposition to do its job? And furthermore, if a sweet little old lady can't open a screw top bottle when alive, how come she can punch through walls when zombified??? A truly scary film would be one where all the science and biology is correct, adds up and is plausible and still something nasty happens. Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Adrian Wintle Posted June 7, 2012 Share Posted June 7, 2012 p.s. somebody nominated the zombie movie 28 Days Later. Now, once a person dies, he/she starts to decompose and fall apart once the body's cells stop self repairing. Given that the zombies portrayed in films always seem to be decomposing, one must thus presume that whatever animates them doesn't also restart their cellular processes. Which leads me to ask, why not sit tight and wait for decomposition to do its job? And furthermore, if a sweet little old lady can't open a screw top bottle when alive, how come she can punch through walls when zombified??? A truly scary film would be one where all the science and biology is correct, adds up and is plausible and still something nasty happens. I always questioned how Zombies managed to stay 'mobile' since they only seem to eat the few non-zombies they manage to catch. Even if they weren't decomposing, wouldn't you just have to find a well stocked hide-out for a month or so to let them keel over from malnutrition? Of course, in Zombieland they seem to have eaten all the Twinkies, which in my mind would accelerate the process of death by malnutrition... And then there is the recent remake of Piranha - apparently they survived 1000s of years in a cut-off underground lake through cannibalism, but the moment it is connected to the rest of the world they change their eating habit to focus on scantily-clad young people. Or there is Sharktopus, a higly improbable amalgam of two incompatible species that is also quite selective in its diet... quite where it puts all the people it eats is unknown, since it is effectively a shark's head with tentacles that can apparently change its size at random. Adrian Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
scots region Posted June 7, 2012 Author Share Posted June 7, 2012 And then there is the recent remake of Piranha In the interests of Debate, may I just state that the people who made the above film all deserve to DIE!!!!!!!!! Zombieland - fairly ok for me, but then again its all a matter of Opinion Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
shortliner Posted June 7, 2012 Share Posted June 7, 2012 Practically ANYTHING released in connection with DC Comics - The comic artform really doesn't transfer to the big screen if you are over 12! Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
halfwit Posted June 7, 2012 Share Posted June 7, 2012 Practically ANYTHING released in connection with DC Comics - The comic artform really doesn't transfer to the big screen if you are over 12! Being a lifelong 2000AD reader I must say that the Judge Dredd movie was absolutely b***** awfull and did nothing for the character or the comic. Stallone indeed. Muppet. Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
AndrewC Posted June 7, 2012 Share Posted June 7, 2012 Take the movie list for the sci-fi channel and post it here. That pretty sums up the worst movies I've ever seen. Sharktopus, Seattle Super Storm, Camel Spiders, Miami Magma, and the list of dire unflushed turds goes on. I will state though, I have yet to manage more than 10 minutes of viewing of any of these so called movies. Mr. Cranky would have nuked them all if they had made it to the cinema. Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Raffles Posted June 7, 2012 Share Posted June 7, 2012 I'm not sure that the "zombies" in 28 Days Later are zombies as such. They are infected with a virus, making them "crazies" more than zombies. Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
RMweb Premium John M Upton Posted June 7, 2012 RMweb Premium Share Posted June 7, 2012 No idea what the title was, it was that memorable, but some Terminator inspired thing where an outdated cyborg soldier was dumped on a planet used as a giant rubbish dump where he finds humans living illegally. the authorities spot them and send the up to date cyborg soldiers to kill them and he organises the humans to fight back and defeat the cyborg army. The crowning point of this film was not part of the movie itself but the disclaimer in the final credits that 'This is a work of fiction. Any similarity to real characters or events is entirely co-incidental.' Now that would be some co-incidence. That would be 'Soldier', a Kurt Russell film supposedly set in the same timeframe/universe as 'Bladerunner' and one I actually quite liked if only for spotting the various films that bits of the junkyard come from and the endless Hitch Hikers references in many of the screen graphics!! http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0120157/ It bombed at the box office in the US so much so it went straight to DVD (i.e. Tesco bargain bins for a quid) over here. Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
steve1 Posted June 7, 2012 Share Posted June 7, 2012 Anything with Norman Wisdom in it, mistakenly labelled as "comedies" steve Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
peanuts Posted June 7, 2012 Share Posted June 7, 2012 anything with jim carey gurning away at the camera aaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhh Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
RMweb Premium MJI Posted June 7, 2012 RMweb Premium Share Posted June 7, 2012 I have to add my vote for Starship Troopers, it didn't get a key message of the Heinlein book (i.e. you have to earn your citizen's rights [which you may or may not agree with]) nor was it that bad enough to be good (a bit like reverse Kitsch) plus it was chock-full of bad science. Actually that is a large part of the film In the interests of Debate, may I just state that the people who made the above film all deserve to DIE!!!!!!!!! Zombieland - fairly ok for me, but then again its all a matter of Opinion Zombieland was fun Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
iL Dottore Posted June 7, 2012 Share Posted June 7, 2012 ....Actually that is a large part of the film.... I thank you for the correction, I stand corrected. But in my defense, I confess to (just about) sitting through it once - on DVD - using the fast forward button a lot. Although I read the Heinlein story many years ago, it seems to be quite different to the film. That being as it may be, Starship Troopers is still pretty awful. Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
halfwit Posted June 7, 2012 Share Posted June 7, 2012 anything with jim carey gurning away at the camera aaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhh Whilst I agree that Jim Carrey is a gurning pillock who should normally be avoided at all costs, don't let that put you off watching 'The Truman Show' and 'I Love You Phillip Morris', both great films. Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
pete_mcfarlane Posted June 7, 2012 Share Posted June 7, 2012 All of Adam Sandler's films are pretty terrible. I was made to watch 3 of them back to back by some of my American colleagues Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cleefy Posted June 7, 2012 Share Posted June 7, 2012 Spielberg's War of the Worlds. It wasn't so much that it was garbage that grated, rather that it was garbage on so many levels. Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
RMweb Premium Jason T Posted June 8, 2012 RMweb Premium Share Posted June 8, 2012 I would have agreed about Jim Carey a few years ago, I just wanted to punch his stupid face every time I saw it but had to resort at shouting and swearing at the TV instead. However, I then watched Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind and when he puts his hand to a serious role, he can act pretty well. He should just leave comedy roles well alone. Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
RMweb Gold griffgriff Posted June 8, 2012 RMweb Gold Share Posted June 8, 2012 Santa Claus conquers the Martians... End of debate Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
RMweb Premium MJI Posted June 8, 2012 RMweb Premium Share Posted June 8, 2012 I thank you for the correction, I stand corrected. But in my defense, I confess to (just about) sitting through it once - on DVD - using the fast forward button a lot. Although I read the Heinlein story many years ago, it seems to be quite different to the film. That being as it may be, Starship Troopers is still pretty awful. It is a very love hate film, I know it is corny and unbelievable, but it is full of the earn your rights to be a citizen and that Johnny Ricos favourite teacher was an elite soldier. But I find it fun and that is an important part of a film. Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
daftbovine Posted June 8, 2012 Share Posted June 8, 2012 There was an Americanized Thomas the Tank feature film some years ago that must have had Reverend Awdry turning in his grave. I remember being so disappointed that they mucked around with the stories and characters. They could have done so much better. it was unbelievably dreadful. Regards Veronica. Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Steve K Posted June 8, 2012 Share Posted June 8, 2012 p.s. somebody nominated the zombie movie 28 Days Later. Now, once a person dies, he/she starts to decompose and fall apart once the body's cells stop self repairing. Given that the zombies portrayed in films always seem to be decomposing, one must thus presume that whatever animates them doesn't also restart their cellular processes. Which leads me to ask, why not sit tight and wait for decomposition to do its job? And furthermore, if a sweet little old lady can't open a screw top bottle when alive, how come she can punch through walls when zombified??? A reasonable point about zombie movies in general, but 28 Days Later isn't one, although I think I categorised it as such earlier on. The "zombies" are actually crazed humans who have been infected with the Rage virus (not rabies, though). All of Adam Sandler's films are pretty terrible. I was made to watch 3 of them back to back by some of my American colleagues I simply don't get his appeal at all. Usually playing unlikable characters with "hilarious" silly voices, as far as I can tell. However, I shan't put any of his movies on my "worst" list, as I've never sat through a whole one... Spielberg's War of the Worlds. It wasn't so much that it was garbage that grated, rather that it was garbage on so many levels. I actually preferred it to the 1950s version. The action was OK, and Morgan Freeman's voice-overs (straight from the original novel, AFAIK) at the beginning and end bookmarked the film nicely. I also loved the sound of the alien weapons and the look of the infecting weeds. Creepy! Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
scots region Posted June 8, 2012 Author Share Posted June 8, 2012 There was an Americanized Thomas the Tank feature film some years ago that must have had Reverend Awdry turning in his grave. I remember being so disappointed that they mucked around with the stories and characters. They could have done so much better. it was unbelievably dreadful. Regards Veronica. Oh you think that was bad, just watch one of season 15s episodes or alternatively wait until 2014. Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ozexpatriate Posted June 9, 2012 Share Posted June 9, 2012 For those who don't like sequels, the further back you go the worse it gets. The 'golden age of Hollywood' produced some clangers, and then kept making them, over and over again. For example: Donald O'Connor in Francis the talking mule: Francis (1950) Francis Goes to the Races (1951) Francis Goes to West Point (1952) Francis Covers the Big Town (1953) Francis Joins the WACS (1954) Francis in the Navy (1955) Or back when they REALLY cranked them out. "Hey gang, let's put on a show!" the MGM Andy Hardy movies with Mickey Rooney: A Family Affair (1937) You're Only Young Once (1937) Judge Hardy's Children (1938) Love Finds Andy Hardy (1938) Out West with the Hardys (1938) Loews Christmas Greeting (short) (1938) The Hardys Ride High (1939) Andy Hardy Gets Spring Fever (1939) Judge Hardy and Son (1939) Andy Hardy's Dilemma (short) (1940) Andy Hardy Meets Debutante (1940) Andy Hardy's Private Secretary (1941) Life Begins for Andy Hardy (1941) The Courtship of Andy Hardy (1942) Andy Hardy's Double Life (1942) Andy Hardy's Blonde Trouble (1944) Love Laughs at Andy Hardy (1946) Andy Hardy Comes Home (1958) Not counting the commercial shorts, there were 15 sequels!! As a point of reference, National Velvet was released in 1944 and Girl Crazy was 1943. There are just so many really bad movies that we forget ... because they are forgettable. Because of this, the answer to the worst film ever is almost unknowable. Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ozexpatriate Posted June 9, 2012 Share Posted June 9, 2012 All of Adam Sandler's films are pretty terrible. I was made to watch 3 of them back to back by some of my American colleagues I will confess to having enjoyed The Wedding Singer. Sure it's silly, but sometimes that's OK. The rest are pretty much schlock. Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ozexpatriate Posted June 9, 2012 Share Posted June 9, 2012 I had to sit through 'Lost in Translation' for the sake of politeness. Not necessarily a masterpiece, but I don't think it belongs on a "worst" list. 1960's Bond parody 'Casino Royale'. Why? Is Casino Royale really worse than its contemporaries like The Pink Panther and What's Up Pussycat? It's what passed for madcap in the 60s. We wouldn't have Austin Powers without it. Anything by M. Night Shyamalan. The only director who's films have got progressively worse with each new one.... Even the "surprise" in The Sixth Sense was too easy to work out early on. I would agree that he gets worse and worse. I did enjoy The Sixth Sense the first time through. Once you know what happens it's not a movie for rewatching. Still the internets have lists. I liked these: IMDB's bottom 100 Ebert's Most Hated Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
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