Allegheny1600 Posted November 7, 2022 Share Posted November 7, 2022 Seeing how I went and got us back to elephant jokes and for the benefit of a younger audience; How do you get four elephants in a mini? Two in the back, two in the front. How do you know when an elephant has been in your fridge? Footprints in the butter. How do you get two whales in a mini? Get the elephants out first. How do you get to Wales in a mini? Follow the M4 west. I’ll stop now!!! 4 2 2 2 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RMweb Premium Compound2632 Posted November 7, 2022 RMweb Premium Share Posted November 7, 2022 16 minutes ago, Allegheny1600 said: Seeing how I went and got us back to elephant jokes and for the benefit of a younger audience; If this topic has a younger audience, I hold out little hope for the continuation of civilisation! 1 3 1 6 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post KeithMacdonald Posted November 7, 2022 Popular Post Share Posted November 7, 2022 Something for the older audience then? 6 1 9 8 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Danemouth Posted November 7, 2022 Share Posted November 7, 2022 1 hour ago, Allegheny1600 said: Seeing how I went and got us back to elephant jokes and for the benefit of a younger audience; How do you get four elephants in a mini? Two in the back, two in the front. How do you know when an elephant has been in your fridge? Footprints in the butter. How do you get two whales in a mini? Get the elephants out first. How do you get to Wales in a mini? Follow the M4 west. I’ll stop now!!! Must have first heard them ~60 years ago 😀 Makes me feel old Dave 4 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Titan Posted November 7, 2022 Share Posted November 7, 2022 1 hour ago, KeithMacdonald said: Something for the older audience then? It is my Godsons fourth birthday next year, I am not sure that I can resist the temptation... 4 1 1 7 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
proton Posted November 7, 2022 Share Posted November 7, 2022 1 hour ago, KeithMacdonald said: Something for the older audience then? All I see is four candles... 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
KeithMacdonald Posted November 7, 2022 Share Posted November 7, 2022 5 minutes ago, proton said: All I see is four candles... What?!?!? You must have had a seriously deprived childhood. Just for you then... 1 3 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
proton Posted November 7, 2022 Share Posted November 7, 2022 13 minutes ago, KeithMacdonald said: What?!?!? You must have had a seriously deprived childhood. Just for you then... Yes, I know.... 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RMweb Premium Ian J. Posted November 7, 2022 RMweb Premium Share Posted November 7, 2022 (edited) How you do know when there's two elephants in your fridge? You can't close the door! 🤪 Edited November 7, 2022 by Ian J. 1 1 9 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Obi-Jiff Kenobi Posted November 7, 2022 Share Posted November 7, 2022 Why did the two elephants have to take it in turns to go swimming? Because they only had one pair of trunks between them! 17 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
KeithMacdonald Posted November 7, 2022 Share Posted November 7, 2022 4 hours ago, Danemouth said: Makes me feel old Is Old the new dwarf? 4 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dorsetmike Posted November 7, 2022 Share Posted November 7, 2022 There were five ants in discussions about renting a flat with another five ants. They went ahead and now they're tenants. 1 11 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CameronL Posted November 7, 2022 Share Posted November 7, 2022 How do you get down from an elephant? You don't, you get down from a goose. 3 1 1 7 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
F-UnitMad Posted November 7, 2022 Share Posted November 7, 2022 9 hours ago, Allegheny1600 said: Seeing how I went and got us back to elephant jokes and for the benefit of a younger audience; Why do elephants paint the soles of their feet yellow? ...So they can hide upside down in a bowl of custard. Have you ever seen an elephant hiding upside down in a bowl of custard? No? See, it works! 4 2 9 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RMweb Premium newbryford Posted November 7, 2022 RMweb Premium Share Posted November 7, 2022 20 hours ago, 33C said: 1,430! But that includes repeats, so probably nearer 430........ 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DavidB-AU Posted November 7, 2022 Share Posted November 7, 2022 11 hours ago, KeithMacdonald said: Something for the older audience then? At Ronnie Barker's public memorial service at Westminster Abbey. the cross was accompanied by four candles instead of the usual two. 3 5 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
KeithMacdonald Posted November 8, 2022 Share Posted November 8, 2022 36 minutes ago, DavidB-AU said: At Ronnie Barker's public memorial service at Westminster Abbey. the cross was accompanied by four candles instead of the usual two. Ditto at Ronnie Corbett's memorial service. God bless them both. 1 5 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Obi-Jiff Kenobi Posted November 8, 2022 Share Posted November 8, 2022 There is a rude version of this joke, but I’ll stick with the clean version... Why do elephants paint their toenails red? So they can hide in cherry trees. What’s the loudest noise in the jungle? Giraffes eating cherries. 1 12 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post F-UnitMad Posted November 8, 2022 Popular Post Share Posted November 8, 2022 1 27 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RMweb Gold Colin_McLeod Posted November 8, 2022 Author RMweb Gold Share Posted November 8, 2022 18 hours ago, proton said: All I see is four candles... All I see is fork handles. 😉 1 9 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
steve1 Posted November 8, 2022 Share Posted November 8, 2022 His addiction was getting out of hand. First it was the Shakespeare but now he was doing poetry. He’d gone from Bard to verse… steve 13 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post Steamport Southport Posted November 9, 2022 Popular Post Share Posted November 9, 2022 A woman was sitting in a park where some children were playing. Impressed by their behaviour she approached the adult who was with them and said "These kids are very well behaved" The other woman, quite annoyed, retorted 'They are not kids. They are children. Kids are young goats.' The first woman apologised, asking 'Are you their mother?' 'No' came the reply, 'I'm their nanny.' 1 1 27 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DavidB-AU Posted November 9, 2022 Share Posted November 9, 2022 Why do Swedish warships have barcodes? So that when they return to port, they can Scandinavian. 1 3 5 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RMweb Premium Compound2632 Posted November 9, 2022 RMweb Premium Share Posted November 9, 2022 3 hours ago, DavidB-AU said: Why do Swedish warships have barcodes? I thought that was a poem addressed to a sailing ship? 1 1 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RMweb Premium J. S. Bach Posted November 9, 2022 RMweb Premium Share Posted November 9, 2022 (edited) On 07/11/2022 at 07:21, Allegheny1600 said: ...snip... How do you get two whales in a mini? Get the elephants out first. How do you get to Wales in a mini? Follow the M4 west. I first heard those as a combination : How do you get two whales in a mini? Over the xxxx bridge (name unremembered now). Edited November 9, 2022 by J. S. Bach To do a minor edit. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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