Obi-Jiff Kenobi

Daddy wouldn’t buy me a bow-wow.

What a joke that was.

According to (IIRC) Doug Nye's amazing History of the Grand Prix Car (vol 2), when Porsche rocked up at Footwork with a life-sized blueprint of the proposed engine, the Footwork boys assumed it had been printed at larger than life size!

It's also a bit short. Last time they seriously tried taking F1 back there, they worked out that the cars would be doing a lap in just over a minute, and apparently there is some sort of caveat about the minimum length of an F1 lap being over 60 seconds. Cars these days are even faster... (posted simultaneously with Pete's similar one)

Great counter argument, Pete. No penalty system is perfect, but the one in use at the moment seems to generate a lot of negative feedback. There’s room for improvement, but maybe not by introducing my version as proposed.

I’ve been saying for years that the penalty system currently in use needs completely overhauling. I think they should do away with drive-throughs and stop & go penalties. Teams can appeal against other penalties, but these, once applied, can’t be rescinded. Instead, I’d simply remove points. For driving standards infringements, deduct points from the driver concerned; for technical infringements, constructors’ championship points get taken away. That way, not only would drivers and teams be unable to overcome silly penalties such as drive-throughs or grid place deductions by changing strategy, but if teams appeal and are successful, points are reinstated and no harm is done.

We don't seem to have much of that sort of thing these days. Would anyone care to speculate what Fifty Shades of Grey is satirising?

They could also go with Society of Pedants.

If I drew a picture of Rick Blaine from Casablanca on the toilet wall, would it be classed as Humphrey Bog-art?

I think the only people who hadn’t already come to that conclusion are all firmly in the Verstappen camp!

There are rumours that Mercedes will turn up at this week’s test with a B spec car that has no sidepods. Apparently they’ve mounted the radiators further inboard and more vertically, and it’s showing enormous advantages in the sims. Obviously they must still have the deformable crash structure alongside the driver, but if true it will be interesting to see how they’ve managed it.

You mean to say that Mazespin is not in F1 solely due to his talent?

Makes me think of Dolly Parton in a sports bra.

It might be a bit scorched.

How do you get down from an elephant? You don't - you get down from a duck.

The shortcomings were less apparent in the original version, designed for and used in the 1968 Indy 500. Sustained high speed running with little to no braking except for regular fuel stops, low frontal area, clean doorstop shape, light weight, four-wheel drive, and very capable of winning but for failure of a small component. That version also had the best livery, STP fluorescent orange, with dayglo yellow accents - quite striking! Indy changed the rules for the next year, they thought a grid full of wingless fighter planes whistling round the track might have less appeal for car-mad fans than noisy piston engines.

To quote Keke Rosberg (the finest moustache to race in F1): "The fact is that we F1 drivers are like (ladies of negotiable virtue). If the money is right we'll turn up anywhere to do our stuff." Drivers who consider themselves in contention for the championship will race, wherever the race is held. That doesn't say much for Vettel's opinion of the newest Aston Martin!

I bet it'll be some time before the FIA actually remove the Russian GP from the calendar. Despite ruling over such a fast-paced sport, their response is often glacially slow, especially to world events. Remember March 2020, when the whole circus rocked up in Oz for the opening race, despite most countries going into lockdown of some sort?

Titter ye not!

That's on Talking Pictures TV on Sunday, for UK viewers.

I read a little about this 'Birds Aren't Real' movement recently, but can't remember where. It's probably worth using the search engine of your choice, it's not quite as mad as it sounds!

I tried selling t-shirts with the chemical symbols for potassium, nobellium and boron on them, but nobody was interested.

I read it here: Atlas Obscura - grapefruit is weird

I've just been reading a little about that, how it was discovered that grapefruit inhibit medicines (it involved drugs, alcohol and raiding the refrigerator), and how the sneaky blighter does it.

What’s worse than raining cats and dogs? Hailing taxis.