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The Forum Jokes Thread


Colin_McLeod
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Sexist, racist or religious jokes aren't funny - keep them to yourself!

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12 minutes ago, Titan said:

I thought the correct answer was something like "Forget about your bum, what the hell is up with your legs?"

I never realised how dangerously some of you guys like to live!!!  :scared:

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46 minutes ago, F-UnitMad said:

I never realised how dangerously some of you guys like to live!!!  :scared:

Hi There,

 

I'm amazed that so many that regard themselfs men are so frightened of women !!!

 

What is all this SWMBO nonsense ? Have you no will of your own ? Where is your fortitude ?

 

My selection process has always been that they know where the door is and I'll happily shut it behind them, I then tell them with a smile that they are welcome to stay so long as they accept that I am a real man because that is the way it is. Feminists hate that one and are off, running and shutting the door behind them before before I get the chance to open it for them in a gentlemanly fashion, and life is so much more pleasant with out them I can tell you.

 

These barren types are likely buying their own drinks at the bar and putting their own shelves up with a substandard pink plastic tool kit from Argos, while wearing dungarees. Good for them !

 

It sounds like you all need a real woman, one that understands femininity not one that orders you about as though you are a child or a mouse.

 

Ying and yang explains all that, balance and equity, not instability and partiality bias.

 

Gibbo.

 

 

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Hello Gibbo, I slightly disagree. Women are fun to have around. Thanks to Mrs Smith, she has , and continues,  to do fantastic things. 

 

She is a fantastic cook, and my waistline bears testimony to that.

 

And, I get somewhere to park my bike at night......

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12 minutes ago, Gibbo675 said:

Hi There,

 

I'm amazed that so many that regard themselfs men are so frightened of women !!!

 

What is all this SWMBO nonsense ? Have you no will of your own ? Where is your fortitude ?

 

My selection process has always been that they know where the door is and I'll happily shut it behind them, I then tell them with a smile that they are welcome to stay so long as they accept that I am a real man because that is the way it is. Feminists hate that one and are off, running and shutting the door behind them before before I get the chance to open it for them in a gentlemanly fashion, and life is so much more pleasant with out them I can tell you.

 

These barren types are likely buying their own drinks at the bar and putting their own shelves up with a substandard pink plastic tool kit from Argos, while wearing dungarees. Good for them !

 

It sounds like you all need a real woman, one that understands femininity not one that orders you about as though you are a child or a mouse.

 

Ying and yang explains all that, balance and equity, not instability and partiality bias.

 

Gibbo.

 

 

How is life as a monk? :jester:

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16 hours ago, Gibbo675 said:

Hi Chris,

 

Plenty of times, but then its a rhetorical question to which she knows the answer:

 

n722086651_201267_6785.jpg.0d33699a8767011b989e8d4076beae76.jpg

 

Gibbo.

 

8 minutes ago, PhilJ W said:

How is life as a monk? :jester:

Hi Phil,

 

I would suggest that a single picture paints a thousand words.

 

Gibbo.

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5 minutes ago, chris p bacon said:

 

But some of those words are 'Village people lookalike' and 'blow up doll'...........:D

Hi Dave,

 

Only nine hundred and ninety four words to go !

 

You only described me and have missed the equally obvious, smiling blonde, PVC dress, knee high stockings, long gloves, and riding crop.

 

That has shortened it to nine hundred and eighty three words.

 

Gibbo.

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1 hour ago, Gibbo675 said:

You only described me and have missed the equally obvious, smiling blonde, PVC dress, knee high stockings, long gloves, and riding crop.

 

Ah, so you're the one with the hat ... 

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