bagpipes331 Posted January 7, 2015 Author Share Posted January 7, 2015 My favourite time of the year.........a mere 20% rise in subs, renovations and west wing almost complete on our club house. Again, only top quality labour has been employed, and notice the superb Brunellian arch I had knocked through. I'm considering re-naming the clubhouse Taj Temple Meads, as I see those chaps in India have gone and built a similar clubhouse themselves. Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
RMweb Gold westerhamstation Posted January 7, 2015 RMweb Gold Share Posted January 7, 2015 You've gone and done it now, who mentioned the SUBS word, it's like poking a happily sleeping crocodile with a sharp stick. I for one have happily paid the miserly 20% increase + vat . Those of you who have not yet paid be afraid, very afraid as his subs collector is doing his rounds and will be visiting a hospital near you. Terms and conditions apply, your home/safety may be at risk if late payment occurs. may contain nuts. Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
railsquid Posted January 7, 2015 Share Posted January 7, 2015 Terms and conditions apply, your home/safety may be at risk if late payment occurs. may contain nuts. Why yes, my home does contain nuts. Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
railsquid Posted January 7, 2015 Share Posted January 7, 2015 Damn, no place to hide from the subs collector. Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
bagpipes331 Posted January 7, 2015 Author Share Posted January 7, 2015 Following extensive interviews I have hired the latest recruit to my late subs collection squad. Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
SM42 Posted January 7, 2015 Share Posted January 7, 2015 Mrs SM42 said "Awww cute kitty" Andy Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
jcredfer Posted January 7, 2015 Share Posted January 7, 2015 Aahh .... yes .... I think I have located one .... Why yes, my home does contain nuts. ... There - look, just by your computer keyboard. ....... oh, wait ....................... someone put a mirror in front of my Screen ...... Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
bagpipes331 Posted January 7, 2015 Author Share Posted January 7, 2015 Just taken a quick shot under my work bench, as there are always a few nuts under here.................. Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
jcredfer Posted January 7, 2015 Share Posted January 7, 2015 Hopefully ............................... all of them .................... Just taken a quick shot under my work bench, as there are always a few nuts under here.................. Nuts.png ...................................... Mineral ............ .. Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mr Grumpy Posted January 7, 2015 Share Posted January 7, 2015 This Topic is nuts Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
bagpipes331 Posted January 13, 2015 Author Share Posted January 13, 2015 Thanks to the 20% hike uplift in subs, the extension housing the chairman's suite is now complete. Not quite enough left in the kitty to furnish to my complete taste, but you can only do what you can get away with..... I have taken the opportunity to nip down to the local haberdashery and get the latest Clumsy suits run up.....I feel another raise in subs coming your our way...... Hopefully the girls in the group will look just fine...................... Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
railsquid Posted January 13, 2015 Share Posted January 13, 2015 Damn, I'll have to sell another first-born child at this rate. But what's this? Oh, it looks like the shoestring budget mentioned recently in the form of the chairman's wallet, which presumably he dropped in a moment of clumsiness. If I send it back, do you think I would be allowed to keep the shoestring? It's very nice and one day I might be able to afford a second one. Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
RMweb Premium PhilJ W Posted January 13, 2015 RMweb Premium Share Posted January 13, 2015 Damn, I'll have to sell another first-born child at this rate. But what's this? Oh, it looks like the shoestring budget mentioned recently in the form of the chairman's wallet, which presumably he dropped in a moment of clumsiness. If I send it back, do you think I would be allowed to keep the shoestring? It's very nice and one day I might be able to afford a second one. Shoestring.jpg Should have held it to ransom. Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
bagpipes331 Posted January 13, 2015 Author Share Posted January 13, 2015 This clumsy motorist fell from a multi storey car park, but luckily the loco broke the fall............... Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
railsquid Posted January 13, 2015 Share Posted January 13, 2015 Should have held it to ransom. Yeah, but if I do that, Mr. Bagpipes will just send in the club SWAT team. Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
bagpipes331 Posted January 13, 2015 Author Share Posted January 13, 2015 Following the modest refurb of the chairman's suite, I found enough loose change to invite a couple of lucky members round for a take-away. Big mistake ordering the vindaloo though......... Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
railsquid Posted January 14, 2015 Share Posted January 14, 2015 Coincidentally, in order to finance the club dues I recently patented a natural gas extraction method called "vindaloo fracking", tragically the recent collapse in oil prices have ruined any chances of exploiting it commercially. Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
jcredfer Posted January 14, 2015 Share Posted January 14, 2015 The idea is apparently not entirely new ............... Coincidentally, in order to finance the club dues I recently patented a natural gas extraction method called "vindaloo fracking", tragically the recent collapse in oil prices have ruined any chances of exploiting it commercially. Back in the 60s certain PE College Students were seen on a number of occasions deciding which of them made the loudest/best fracking Vindaloo noises, demonstrations were done on the benches in the changing room, for the best "sound" distribution ........ ................ ............ inevitably, eventually, someone decided that the gas quality should also be tested - by application of a lit cigarette lighter, close to the source - resulting in the most remarkable jets of flame ....... ..... and sadly someone's singed rear-end ....... PS. It might be noted that these "Enterprising" young men went on to deliver their acquired College Education to thousands of youngsters all across the country .... Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
RMweb Premium PhilJ W Posted January 14, 2015 RMweb Premium Share Posted January 14, 2015 The idea is apparently not entirely new ............... Back in the 60s certain PE College Students were seen on a number of occasions deciding which of them made the loudest/best fracking Vindaloo noises, demonstrations were done on the benches in the changing room, for the best "sound" distribution ........ ................ ............ inevitably, eventually, someone decided that the gas quality should also be tested - by application of a lit cigarette lighter, close to the source - resulting in the most remarkable jets of flame ....... ..... and sadly someone's singed rear-end ....... PS. It might be noted that these "Enterprising" young men went on to deliver their acquired College Education to thousands of youngsters all across the country .... I remember a similar occurrence when I was an air cadet, back, crack and sack wax no longer required. Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
RMweb Premium jamie92208 Posted January 14, 2015 RMweb Premium Share Posted January 14, 2015 The idea is apparently not entirely new ............... Back in the 60s certain PE College Students were seen on a number of occasions deciding which of them made the loudest/best fracking Vindaloo noises, demonstrations were done on the benches in the changing room, for the best "sound" distribution ........ ................ ............ inevitably, eventually, someone decided that the gas quality should also be tested - by application of a lit cigarette lighter, close to the source - resulting in the most remarkable jets of flame ....... ..... and sadly someone's singed rear-end ....... PS. It might be noted that these "Enterprising" young men went on to deliver their acquired College Education to thousands of youngsters all across the country .... More years ago than I care to remember I was a regular volunteer at Ravenglass. Winter working parties were always provided with vast quantities of pie and mushy peas by Dai Pickup. The inevitable result happenned and we were all nice and snug in the tool van. The conversation turned to harvesting the results and if it would be possible to power the train loco on natural gas. All sorts of designs were suggested but the problem of sealing the collectors effectively defeated us. Jamie Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
bagpipes331 Posted January 14, 2015 Author Share Posted January 14, 2015 More years ago than I care to remember I was a regular volunteer at Ravenglass. Winter working parties were always provided with vast quantities of pie and mushy peas by Dai Pickup. The inevitable result happenned and we were all nice and snug in the tool van. The conversation turned to harvesting the results and if it would be possible to power the train loco on natural gas. All sorts of designs were suggested but the problem of sealing the collectors effectively defeated us. Jamie After a night out at the local Indian, we just attach the apparatus to our nether regions, and hey presto....a free ride home Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
5050 Posted January 14, 2015 Share Posted January 14, 2015 This anal-gas talk is all well and good - but if you suddenly have a blowback at the point of ignition........................................... Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
railsquid Posted January 14, 2015 Share Posted January 14, 2015 Over on the ER thread there's much talk of colonoscopies... I'm wondering if there's potential for synergy here? Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
RMweb Premium jamie92208 Posted January 14, 2015 RMweb Premium Share Posted January 14, 2015 This anal-gas talk is all well and good - but if you suddenly have a blowback at the point of ignition........................................... Yes there was a piece in Private Eye once about that happenning after someone got a live hamster stuck and his friend looked for it with a lighted match. After the resulting explosion the hamster came out so fast that the friend's face was bady cut and both gentlemen had to go to hospital. It all happenned in Utah. From memory I believe that the activity they were engaged in was called Felching but on the grounds of decency and taste I will say no more. It was however a very entertaining news story to read. Jamie Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
jcredfer Posted January 14, 2015 Share Posted January 14, 2015 ................................................. OK .............................................. who stole it? ............................................................ ....................................................... where is the Vomit Icon? .............. Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
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