RMweb Premium newbryford Posted November 5, 2022 RMweb Premium Share Posted November 5, 2022 4 hours ago, CameronL said: Me too, but on cold days it just says "AIRWAYS". or "wllly" 3 Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Allegheny1600 Posted November 5, 2022 Share Posted November 5, 2022 1 hour ago, Compound2632 said: Definitely not. The University of Derby did not achieve that status until 1992. Oops! As a former student of that establishment, I forgot about that! Either it was from the polytechnic or it was from a different university. 1 1 2 Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
RMweb Premium Compound2632 Posted November 5, 2022 RMweb Premium Share Posted November 5, 2022 (edited) 22 minutes ago, Allegheny1600 said: As a former student of that establishment, I forgot about that! Either it was from the polytechnic or it was from a different university. Anyway, I doubt that an elephant in the wild in 1986 would have been in captivity in 2006: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Captive_elephants A google search shows the story is told with a variety of universities (generally US) and a variety of zoos (also US) but the protagonist is always called Peter Davies. Probably wasn't the same Peter Davies. Edited November 5, 2022 by Compound2632 3 Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
RMweb Premium Compound2632 Posted November 5, 2022 RMweb Premium Share Posted November 5, 2022 (edited) I am reminded of an old friend of mine who fell into the rhinoceros enclosure at the zoo. "Did the rhinoceros charge?" I asked. "Yes", said he, "Fifty quid. Outrageous!" Edited November 5, 2022 by Compound2632 8 Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Steamport Southport Posted November 5, 2022 Share Posted November 5, 2022 A streaker decides to run into the elephant enclosure. "Blimey" said one elephant to his mate, "He can't drink much water with that!" 1 15 Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hroth Posted November 5, 2022 Share Posted November 5, 2022 6 hours ago, CameronL said: Me too, but on cold days it just says "AIRWAYS". And fully extended; "Fly United..." 2 1 Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
CameronL Posted November 5, 2022 Share Posted November 5, 2022 3 hours ago, Steamport Southport said: Without getting into that debate, I do know a girl who voted pro EU as she genuinely thought that she wouldn't be able to watch Eurovision..... I mean, come on! Australia is in it!! 🦘 🇦🇺 True, but we deported so many criminals there that Australia is a part of Europe genetically if not geographically. 1 Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
RMweb Gold Colin_McLeod Posted November 5, 2022 Author RMweb Gold Share Posted November 5, 2022 (edited) Congratulations to @Steamport Southport who posted the 20,000th post in the jokes thread and @Hroth who posted the 20,000th reply. Unfortunately there is no prize lol 😁 Edited November 5, 2022 by Colin_McLeod 1 2 1 Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Steamport Southport Posted November 5, 2022 Share Posted November 5, 2022 Wow! We've got to be careful though. James Corden might start nicking our jokes! 🤡 For those that might have missed it https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/newsbeat-63483918 2 Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
RMweb Premium J. S. Bach Posted November 6, 2022 RMweb Premium Share Posted November 6, 2022 (edited) 10 hours ago, Steamport Southport said: I met mine in Llanfairpwllgwyngyllgogerychwyrndrobwllllantysiliogogogoch...... Were? Edited November 6, 2022 by J. S. Bach To correct a typo. 1 Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Steamport Southport Posted November 6, 2022 Share Posted November 6, 2022 13 minutes ago, J. S. Bach said: Were? Llanfairpwllgwyngyllgogerychwyrndrobwllllantysiliogogogoch...... And yes, I can say it! 1 1 Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Obi-Jiff Kenobi Posted November 6, 2022 Share Posted November 6, 2022 What did the elephant say to the naked man? ”Cute, but can it pick up peanuts?” 2 5 Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
RMweb Premium Compound2632 Posted November 6, 2022 RMweb Premium Share Posted November 6, 2022 4 hours ago, Obi-Jiff Kenobi said: What did the elephant say to the naked man? ”Cute, but can it pick up peanuts?” To which the man replied: "Massive, but can it pick up girls?" (To which the answer is, of course, yes - also tree trunks, etc.) 5 Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
RMweb Gold chris p bacon Posted November 6, 2022 RMweb Gold Share Posted November 6, 2022 8 hours ago, Obi-Jiff Kenobi said: What did the elephant say to the naked man? ”Cute, but can it pick up peanuts?” And exactly where would they be stuffed.... 1 1 Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
F-UnitMad Posted November 6, 2022 Share Posted November 6, 2022 19 hours ago, J. S. Bach said: Were? Edited 19 hours ago by J. S. Bach To correct a typo. Correct a typo?? When it should read "Where?"... 🙄🙄🤣🤣 Now over 20,000 posts in the Jokes Thread. What a pity only 1,427 are actually jokes.... 😝😝😝 1 3 2 Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Steamport Southport Posted November 6, 2022 Share Posted November 6, 2022 I say, I say, I say, my wife's just gone to the West Indies Jamaica No, she went of her own accord! 2 5 2 Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hroth Posted November 6, 2022 Share Posted November 6, 2022 6 hours ago, chris p bacon said: And exactly where would they be stuffed.... Where the monkey put it's nuts??? Hat, coat, outski.... 1 Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
RJS1977 Posted November 6, 2022 Share Posted November 6, 2022 40 minutes ago, Steamport Southport said: I say, I say, I say, my wife's just gone to the West Indies Jamaica No, she went of her own accord! Mine's gone to the East Indies. Jakarta? No, she went by boat! 1 3 Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
RMweb Premium PhilJ W Posted November 6, 2022 RMweb Premium Share Posted November 6, 2022 1 hour ago, F-UnitMad said: Correct a typo?? When it should read "Where?"... 🙄🙄🤣🤣 Now over 20,000 posts in the Jokes Thread. What a pity only 1,427 are actually jokes.... 😝😝😝 You counted them? 1 1 Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
F-UnitMad Posted November 6, 2022 Share Posted November 6, 2022 48 minutes ago, PhilJ W said: You counted them? Only the ones that were actually funny.... 1 Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
RMweb Premium kevinlms Posted November 7, 2022 RMweb Premium Share Posted November 7, 2022 5 hours ago, F-UnitMad said: Correct a typo?? When it should read "Where?"... 🙄🙄🤣🤣 Now over 20,000 posts in the Jokes Thread. What a pity only 1,427 are actually jokes.... 😝😝😝 I counted 1,429, you need to do a recount! 1 1 2 Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
33C Posted November 7, 2022 Share Posted November 7, 2022 This Christmas i'm going to send each of my family members a big pile of snow. I hope they get my drift.... 1,430! 10 Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
RMweb Premium kevinlms Posted November 7, 2022 RMweb Premium Share Posted November 7, 2022 5 hours ago, F-UnitMad said: Only the ones that were actually funny.... And recently, the percentage of good ones is dropping! 1 2 Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
CameronL Posted November 7, 2022 Share Posted November 7, 2022 10 hours ago, RJS1977 said: Mine's gone to the East Indies. Jakarta? No, she went by boat! I spent a weekend with my wife in a North Wales town on the Menai Straits. Bangor? No, she had a headache. 8 1 Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hroth Posted November 7, 2022 Share Posted November 7, 2022 16 minutes ago, CameronL said: I spent a weekend with my wife in a North Wales town on the Menai Straits. Bangor? No, she had a headache. Definitely TMI... 1 1 Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
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