MartynJPearson Posted May 24, 2023 Share Posted May 24, 2023 Mate of mine started a job at the bakery. "I don't think my boss trusts me", he said "Why not?" I asked "I told him I'd mixed some dough, and he asked me to prove it" 9 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
aardvark Posted May 24, 2023 Share Posted May 24, 2023 A friend wanted to start his own bakery storefront, but alas, he kneaded more dough. 7 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
KeithMacdonald Posted May 24, 2023 Share Posted May 24, 2023 16 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post KeithMacdonald Posted May 26, 2023 Popular Post Share Posted May 26, 2023 1 18 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hroth Posted May 27, 2023 Share Posted May 27, 2023 1 hour ago, KeithMacdonald said: At least they don't have the problem that a dweller at 99 would have with 66, 96 or 69..... 2 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RMweb Premium kevinlms Posted May 27, 2023 RMweb Premium Share Posted May 27, 2023 (edited) 9 hours ago, Hroth said: At least they don't have the problem that a dweller at 99 would have with 66, 96 or 69..... Next door to me is number 19. Or is it... Edited May 27, 2023 by kevinlms Clarification 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RMweb Gold The Johnster Posted May 27, 2023 RMweb Gold Share Posted May 27, 2023 667, neighbour of The Beast… 3 1 7 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hroth Posted May 27, 2023 Share Posted May 27, 2023 19 minutes ago, The Johnster said: 667, neighbour of The Beast… The working title for a Gaiman/Pratchett collaboration that never happened... 4 1 2 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CameronL Posted May 27, 2023 Share Posted May 27, 2023 18 hours ago, KeithMacdonald said: I once bought a tie. But I took it back to the shop and asked for a refund. It was too tight. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RMweb Gold The Johnster Posted May 27, 2023 RMweb Gold Share Posted May 27, 2023 Plotline; The Beast, a fearsome pan-dimensional being whose time has come, recruits Rincewind, who has now become proficient in pan-dimensional avoidance of Death, to assist him in his own flight from the Grim Reaper, and of course Binkie. We end up with all four of them fleeing in terror. From The Luggage… 1 1 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
exmoordave Posted May 27, 2023 Share Posted May 27, 2023 As a child we were so poor, all my clothes came from the Army Surplus stores. I was the only Japanes general in my class......... 1 13 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RMweb Premium newbryford Posted May 27, 2023 RMweb Premium Share Posted May 27, 2023 7 hours ago, The Johnster said: 667, neighbour of The Beast… No. That's 664 or 668. 1 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RMweb Gold The Johnster Posted May 27, 2023 RMweb Gold Share Posted May 27, 2023 (edited) Ok, 'Opposite The Beast', then... Edited May 27, 2023 by The Johnster 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RMweb Premium newbryford Posted May 27, 2023 RMweb Premium Share Posted May 27, 2023 11 minutes ago, The Johnster said: Ok, 'Opposite The Beast', then... I live at 20, opposite me is 15........., so that's 661 or 671 then? 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RMweb Gold Dagworth Posted May 27, 2023 RMweb Gold Share Posted May 27, 2023 (edited) The next number to my house is 150 yards down the road, the other side of the traffic lights of a major junction. Took ages for a food delivery driver to find one night! Much like the picture up thread my numbers could be swapped and the house would be opposite me. Andi Edited May 27, 2023 by Dagworth Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RMweb Gold The Johnster Posted May 28, 2023 RMweb Gold Share Posted May 28, 2023 I've got a primary school across the road from me, and that's on the even side of the road where numbers go up to 94. I'm on the odd side, reasonably enough considering, in the end house, which is 107... No beasts among the children, they're all delightful, but some of the parents are not what you want to meet up a dark alley... I had a flat up on Cardiff's Llanederyn estated back in the 90s, and numbering up there was just plain wierd, The streets, if you could call them that, were named for the farms and streams that had been there before the estate was built in the early 70s, and the idea was that all the dwelling would face onto pavement, and grass or woodland; the street access was at the backs of the houses. This insanity was compounded by the numbering, which had been devised to suit Post Office sorting with a complete disregard for consequitiveness or, in some cases, local geography. The flats I lived in, 654 of them, were numbered according to the floorplans, of which there were of course several, with numbers allocated in blocks to each floorplan as if it was a class of locomotives. Another feature of Llanederyn was that it was laid out so that you could walk from any residence's front door to 'The Maelfa' (the central hub where the shops, pub, chippy, police station, council offices, health centre, and communal heating system boiler house were located) without crossing any roads except by bridges or underpasses, and without encountering any steps, walking through pleasant parkland mostly, within a maximum of ten minutes a a gentle stroll. This well-intentioned design won several awards, and to be fair looked brilliant on paper, but of course the reality was that the bridges and underpasses became the haunts of youth gangs as soon as it got dark because the council couldn't keep up with the broken lights, and nobody else ventured outside except through their back doors to use their cars. It took about as long to drive anywhere on the estate as it did to walk, but it was simply unsafe after dark! 10 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jwealleans Posted May 28, 2023 Share Posted May 28, 2023 I live at 6, West End... the house opposite is 259 Westgate. That's Adolf's fault. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RMweb Premium Sidecar Racer Posted May 28, 2023 RMweb Premium Share Posted May 28, 2023 People think you're smart if you wear glasses, but you had to fail a test to get them. 1 12 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
exmoordave Posted May 28, 2023 Share Posted May 28, 2023 Elton John has just bought a treadmil for his rabbit. It's a little fit bunny.......... 1 8 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RMweb Premium Reorte Posted May 28, 2023 RMweb Premium Share Posted May 28, 2023 Boringly off-topic and unfunny, but on the house numbering scheme odds on one side, evens on the other is the most common in the UK (and several other countries) but it's not universal. I'm in number 1, in a row on its own, so they're just numbered 1-8 (with 7 missing because 8 is two houses knocked through in to one). The occasional street has numbers running up sequentially on one side and back down the other. A famous example of next door having the following number is Downing Street. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CameronL Posted May 28, 2023 Share Posted May 28, 2023 (edited) 21 hours ago, Hroth said: The working title for a Gaiman/Pratchett collaboration that never happened.. I can just imagine the opener - One day, while Mr Puty was pruning his roses in the front garden, a removal van pulled up outside the house over the road with a taxi following it. And he saw a beast coming out of the cab. It had ten horns and seven heads, with ten crowns on its horns, and on each head a blasphemous name. The beast he saw resembled a leopard, but had feet like those of a bear and a mouth like that of a lion. Mr Puty walked across the road and said "Hello. You're not from round here, are you?" (Description of the beast straight out of The Book of Revelations). Edited May 28, 2023 by CameronL Added a bit 10 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RMweb Premium PhilJ W Posted May 28, 2023 RMweb Premium Share Posted May 28, 2023 13 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RMweb Premium PhilJ W Posted May 28, 2023 RMweb Premium Share Posted May 28, 2023 1 7 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RMweb Premium kevinlms Posted May 28, 2023 RMweb Premium Share Posted May 28, 2023 When does a rabbit goes as fast as a train? When it's a passenger! 5 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
F-UnitMad Posted May 28, 2023 Share Posted May 28, 2023 54 minutes ago, kevinlms said: When does a rabbit goes as fast as a train? When it's a passenger! It's not time for Xmas cracker jokes already, is it..???!!! 😱 1 3 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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