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The Forum Jokes Thread


Colin_McLeod
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Sexist, racist or religious jokes aren't funny - keep them to yourself!

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5 hours ago, luckymucklebackit said:

 

Franz Schultz claims he wrote all of Shakespeare's works. Schultz also claims that his wife and him wrote the sonnets*

 

 

 

 

 

 

*Monty Python, "Stake your Claim Sketch"

It was Norman Voles.

 

There's another YouTube clip of the TV version, but the subtitles are wrong. It reads 'Schultz' but the dialogue is still Mr Voles. 🙄😉👍

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On 25/04/2024 at 01:57, BR60103 said:

I will defend that the plays weren't written by Shakespeare but by somebody else with the same name.

 

The BBC have just released a documentary about that.

 

 

 

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24 minutes ago, Compound2632 said:

Probably qualifies as sexist. If started at the fourth paragraph, might pass.

 

Certainly doesn’t qualify as very funny…

 

steve

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2 hours ago, steve1 said:

 

Certainly doesn’t qualify as very funny…

 

steve

Which means that you are entitled to complain to the moderators about it, or just move on to the next.

 

Plenty of other posts not funny or repetitive.

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32 minutes ago, KeithMacdonald said:

 

I always wondered what "going off in a huff" would sound like.

It's like being in a train but without the sea.😁

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5 hours ago, KeithMacdonald said:

I always wondered what "going off in a huff" would sound like.

Depends on what year Huff it is, the 1936s sound totally different from the 1939s.

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WORDS THAT ARE DIFFICULT TO SAY WHEN DRUNK:

1. Innovative

2. Preliminary

3. Proliferation

4. Cinnamon

WORDS THAT ARE VERY DIFFICULT TO SAY WHEN DRUNK:

1. Specificity

2. Anti-constitutionalistically

3. Passive-aggressive disorder

4. Transubstantiate

WORDS THAT ARE DOWNRIGHT IMPOSSIBLE TO SAY WHEN DRUNK:

1. No thanks, I'm married.

2. Nope, no more booze for me!

3. Sorry, but you're not really my type.

4. No thanks, I'm not hungry.

5. I'm not interested in fighting you.

6. Thank you, but I won't make any attempt to dance. I have no coordination and would hate to look like a real Fool!

7. Oh no, I must be going home now as I have to work in the morning

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23 minutes ago, jbqfc said:

WORDS THAT ARE DIFFICULT TO SAY WHEN DRUNK:

1. Innovative

2. Preliminary

3. Proliferation

4. Cinnamon

WORDS THAT ARE VERY DIFFICULT TO SAY WHEN DRUNK:

1. Specificity

 ...snip...

I have trouble with that one at any time.

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5 hours ago, Compound2632 said:

 

We need a list of words that are more difficult to say when sober than when drunk...

 

1 minute ago, KeithMacdonald said:

I love you.

 

And, of course, "Will you marry me?"

 

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