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The Forum Jokes Thread


Colin_McLeod
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Sexist, racist or religious jokes aren't funny - keep them to yourself!

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7 hours ago, Gibbo675 said:

Hi Phil,

 

 

 

It is also my guess that they measure everything in "centimeters", Richard Craniums that they are.

 

Gibbo.

What difference does it make if they use centimetres or any other unit of measurement?

The sheet is too big to fit, regardless of unit used.

 

But yes. My computer club has a DOTW (Richard Cranium of the Week) competition, but due to sheer number of entries, we have to limit ourselves to Australian nominees.

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15 hours ago, PhilJ W said:

Growing old is like living in a haunted house. There are sounds and smells that cannot be explained.

Not quite; the sounds and smells can be explained well enough, but it is probably better if they aren't.

 

Blwythyn Newydd Dda, pob un!

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13 minutes ago, KeithMacdonald said:

Everybody thought that somebody would do the job, but nobody did ...

 

(Always make sure you disconnect the corridor connector before you disconnect the loco...)

 

 

 

Oh dear. That looks expensive.

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2 hours ago, KeithMacdonald said:

Everybody thought that somebody would do the job, but nobody did ...

 

A degree of which is necessary because no-one would be able to do anything if everyone always had to check absolutely everything everyone else did. The trick is finding the right balance.

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11 hours ago, KeithMacdonald said:

Everybody thought that somebody would do the job, but nobody did ...

 

(Always make sure you disconnect the corridor connector before you disconnect the loco...)

 

 

 

All those people and all that metal flinging around. Not good.

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On 31/12/2019 at 05:25, kevinlms said:

What difference does it make if they use centimetres or any other unit of measurement?

The sheet is too big to fit, regardless of unit used.

 

But yes. My computer club has a DOTW (Richard Cranium of the Week) competition, but due to sheer number of entries, we have to limit ourselves to Australian nominees.

I think Gibbo was pointing out the Americanism of spelling (centi)meter with 'er' at the end instead of the correct centimetre.  A metre is a unit of length. A meter is device used to measure things. A centimeter would be one hundredth of a device;  so about one transistor....

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4 minutes ago, pH said:

I thought 'peeky blinders' were the little old ladies who surreptitiously observed neighbours from behind window coverings.

 

Are you thinking of "Nosey Parkers"?

 

IIRC, it might have been a spin-off from Thunderbirds.

 

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3 hours ago, KeithMacdonald said:

 

Are you thinking of "Nosey Parkers"?

 

IIRC, it might have been a spin-off from Thunderbirds.

 

 

In some episodes of Thunderbirds, Parker is indeed referred to as 'Nosey' (usually by past acquaintances from his previous life as a safecracker).

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