RMweb Premium newbryford Posted March 10, 2019 RMweb Premium Share Posted March 10, 2019 Shamelessly lifted from FB. 2 8 4 Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
RMweb Premium Ian J. Posted March 10, 2019 RMweb Premium Share Posted March 10, 2019 Groan... 7 1 Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
APOLLO Posted March 11, 2019 Share Posted March 11, 2019 "What do we want?” “Anagrams!” “What-ho! Wet, new mend?” “Own!” Brit15 4 1 4 7 Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
manna Posted March 11, 2019 Share Posted March 11, 2019 G'Day Folks 5 11 Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
luckymucklebackit Posted March 12, 2019 Share Posted March 12, 2019 1 3 Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Liam Posted March 12, 2019 Share Posted March 12, 2019 Now why does this spring to mind? 1 2 Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
RMweb Premium kevinlms Posted March 12, 2019 RMweb Premium Share Posted March 12, 2019 1 hour ago, SVRlad said: Now why does this spring to mind? So who plagiarised? 1 Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Amand Posted March 12, 2019 Share Posted March 12, 2019 I've heard that the Durex factory has had a huge fire. The damage was so bad that the factory has been condommed! 2 3 Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
jcm@gwr Posted March 12, 2019 Share Posted March 12, 2019 I've just found a way of making salad leaves grow 5 times faster. I call it rocket science 1 3 2 Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
RMweb Premium PhilJ W Posted March 12, 2019 RMweb Premium Share Posted March 12, 2019 We really do need that GROAN button. 4 Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
jcm@gwr Posted March 12, 2019 Share Posted March 12, 2019 I'm going to fit a new lock on the bottom of my back door. Nothing fancy, I want to keep it low key. 1 10 Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Classsix T Posted March 12, 2019 Share Posted March 12, 2019 I like to have the drive-train on my model locos running as sweet as a nut, but wear a trench-coat, sunglasses and trilby when asked, they're in-cog-neato. C6T (or am I...) 3 Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
RMweb Premium kevinlms Posted March 12, 2019 RMweb Premium Share Posted March 12, 2019 2 hours ago, Amand said: I've heard that the Durex factory has had a huge fire. The damage was so bad that the factory has been condommed! But it's sticky tape! Or it was, as no longer told in Australia. Durex are condoms now. 1 Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
N15class Posted March 13, 2019 Share Posted March 13, 2019 1 hour ago, kevinlms said: But it's sticky tape! Or it was, as no longer told in Australia. Durex are condoms now. It's still sellotape here in Brazil. 1 1 Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
RMweb Gold teaky Posted March 13, 2019 RMweb Gold Share Posted March 13, 2019 8 hours ago, N15class said: It's still sellotape here in Brazil. Ah, that explains the high population then. 1 7 Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
DavidB-AU Posted March 13, 2019 Share Posted March 13, 2019 (edited) A lifelong Manchester United fan arrives at the UEFA match at Old Trafford and takes his seat. The crowd starts to arrive around him and take their seats too. By the time the match starts the seat next to him is still empty. At half time another fan behind him asks "How come there is a vacant seat next to you? The match was sold out ages ago." The man looks back sadly and says, "Well I bought two tickets, one for myself and one for my wife. But since I bought them she has passed away." The fan behind offers his condolences then asks "Couldn't any of your friends or relatives have used the ticket?" The man looks back and says "I guess so, but they're all at her funeral." Edited March 13, 2019 by DavidB-AU 1 4 1 Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post steve1 Posted March 13, 2019 Popular Post Share Posted March 13, 2019 In a recent job interview I was asked how i would perform under pressure? I thought for a moment and said that i didn’t know all the words to that one, but I could have a good bash at Bohemian Rhapsody" steve 1 1 18 Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post peanuts Posted March 13, 2019 Popular Post Share Posted March 13, 2019 1 20 2 Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
RMweb Premium kevinlms Posted March 13, 2019 RMweb Premium Share Posted March 13, 2019 3 hours ago, peanuts said: 1 6 Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post AndyB Posted March 14, 2019 Popular Post Share Posted March 14, 2019 17 hours ago, peanuts said: Sure I've heard that one before, but.... Don't know where, Don't know when. 2 1 2 18 2 Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
F-UnitMad Posted March 14, 2019 Share Posted March 14, 2019 (edited) On the subject of whales, here in the Black Country (an area of the West Midlands - but NOT Birmingham!!) a local chap claims to his mate that he's caught a whale in the local 'cut' - the local expression for a canal. His mate is incredulous and asks what sort of whale he managed to catch in the cut?? A bicycle whale, was the reply. (It's all to do with the local dialect. Black Country jokes are often called "Aynuck& Ayli jokes" after the two men who usually feature in most of them. ) Edited March 15, 2019 by F-UnitMad 6 1 1 4 Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bernard Lamb Posted March 15, 2019 Share Posted March 15, 2019 19 hours ago, AndyB said: Sure I've heard that one before, but.... Don't know where, Don't know when. Reminds me of a comment by my dad on returning from Singapore and Thailand after 3 1/2 years as a POW. it must have been terrible people would say to him. He would reply that it was not too bad, at least we did not have to listen to Vera Lynn. Some people took this comment seriously. Bernard 2 6 Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
RMweb Gold chris p bacon Posted March 15, 2019 RMweb Gold Share Posted March 15, 2019 1 minute ago, Bernard Lamb said: Reminds me of a comment by my dad on returning from Singapore and Thailand after 3 1/2 years as a POW. it must have been terrible people would say to him. He would reply that it was not too bad, at least we did not have to listen to Vera Lynn. Some people took this comment seriously. Bernard After his time as a PoW My Dad used to say the same, although he wasn't joking... 2 Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
RMweb Premium PhilJ W Posted March 15, 2019 RMweb Premium Share Posted March 15, 2019 22 minutes ago, Bernard Lamb said: Reminds me of a comment by my dad on returning from Singapore and Thailand after 3 1/2 years as a POW. it must have been terrible people would say to him. He would reply that it was not too bad, at least we did not have to listen to Vera Lynn. Some people took this comment seriously. Bernard 20 minutes ago, chris p bacon said: After his time as a PoW My Dad used to say the same, although he wasn't joking... My dad wasn't a POW but he spent most of the war out in Burma. He said that he was thankful that he was on the front line when she was out there and missed seeing her. 2 Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
APOLLO Posted March 16, 2019 Share Posted March 16, 2019 Brit15 1 1 12 Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
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